Your Political Platform?

What would you do if you were in charge? Not who would you vote for and hope they did what you wanted, what would you do if you were the President, Congress, whoever?
Let's start with the basics.
Taxes/Economy
War
Energy Crisis
Welfare(Both Regular and Corporate)
Healthcare
Immigration
And current situations like the Bail Out and other things.
My Platforms/What I would do if I was Overlord of AMerica.
Taxes
Eliminate all loopholes. I would also cut the majority of tax breaks for Billionaires. I'd set up tax levels, much like today. Going from 3% at the 20,000 and under level up to 33%for the top 5%. I know, liberal, trickle down, blaw blaw blaw. Trickle down doesn't work if it did there would be no poor people in America. And a Billionaire paying 2million in taxes is nothing. It's less then what they spend on the fuel for their private jet. Also, since the church can't keep its nose out of politics, charge them ONLY property tax at 40% of the regular pay. I'm not trying to make these churches pay the same membership fee that the rest of America pays. Heck that alone would bring in hundreds of billions a year. And cut out Bush's Sending Jobs Overseas tax cut. If you ship an American's job overseas you shouldn't get a tax cut you should pay more.
Economy
Regulation! The DEregulation of banks gave us what we have today. No more tax breaks for billionaires, no more bail outs. Try to work with China and other countries on the trade deficit. Why do we buy so much from China when they buy so little from us? That is wrong! Either tax the crap out of lead products from China so we get more or make them buy more from us with threats of cutting buying from them.

War
End Iraq, turn it over to the UN. The UN seemed to be doing the job. No WMDS have been found in Iraq so obviously they did their job. This saves trillions of dollars and more importantly it saves American Lives. Send the troops to Afganistan, wipe out the Taliban and FIND OSAMA! Put his head on a spear and put it in the front of the White House.

Energy Crisis
Pretty much what Obama is doing. Make Oil obsolete by going to Hydrogen, solar, wind, biofuels, so forth. Not more drilling. Oil will not help do anything. A plan for everything but Oil. Also, more nuclear energy. Everything I've seen show there is no threat. Any more or less then what you see from other power plants. Also, threaten a takeover of oil companies if they don't stop gouging prices. Actually, that's not a bad idea. Take over oil companies. Why? The Government can then say "Oh well we're gonna go drill in ANWR!" and we'd be able to cut price of gas a lot since now we aren't relying on the taxes from sale of gas but all of it. Easily see 2dollar gas. And any oil we sell to other countries means more money for the Government to spend.

Welfare
First drug test and fingerprint all welfare recipients. Drugs? No more Welfare for a year, then need to be tested again. And fingerprinting cuts down on scammers. This saves millions. Corporate welfare? Why does a Billionaire need billions more? I'd probably cut billions in corporate welfare and restructure it so only small companies got it. No more Billionaires getting billions.

Healthcare
With no more Iraq, and Billions cut from welfare and corporate welfare, and property tax on Church/Temple/whatever and takeover of oil companies we'd have trillions a year. That would more then pay for healthcare for all Americans. By Americans I mean fingerprinted, SSN check, and given care. No SSN/proof of citizenship? Deported to your home country.

Immigration
With the trillions coming in build a real wall, not virtual. Also with end of Iraq War have troops stationed at border. Then raid all Home Depot, Walmart, meat packing companies and so forth and send the people back home.

Well, vote for me, or put your platform up and lets see if you'd make a good presidential candidate or not!

reply to post by GordonJQ


If ‘I’ were president, here’s what I’d do -


I would call on the most devout men and women from every faith, from all walks of life to join me for a private, seven day prayer vigil at the white house. We would pray to god in a sincere manner for his immediate return, or for his quick assistance with the insurmountable troubles facing the world. If god failed to respond within a specified time, I would close our borders, halt all air travel and begin working with military elite on creating the most advanced “alien’ looking spacecraft known to man.

Simultaneously, I would legalize an industrial grade psychedelic drug, and require its use amongst all Americans. I would cancel all news broadcast for months, and replace normal TV programming on every station with the same programs every day. In the mornings: ‘Rocky and Bullwinkle’ in the afternoons: old episodes of Scooby-Doo (without Scrappy), and in the evenings: the Beatles film ‘The Magical Mystery Tour.’ And every time someone might try to connect to the internet their computer would either direct them to an image of a smiling ‘Gary Busey,’ or to the music video ‘China girl’ by David Bowie. By this time all Americans, and the entire world, would be getting seriously freaked-out.
People would begin to riot (this is when I would unveil the massive spaceship.) From coast to coast all eyes would see it. In an instant, it would be able to incinerate the side of a mountain, or thousands of square miles of land.

At the helm of this monstrous craft would be the ugliest, the most frightening looking muppet ever created. The giant ship would hover over every city and proclaim in a thunderous voice “You fools, you were given every chance to love one another, to help one another, to share with one another, but you refused, and now you must pay the ultimate consequence!” When people try to shoot my muppet creation, fire will come out of its muppet mouth and burn them. Periodically, the close-up image of the muppets face will interrupt television programming. It will never say anything, but will slowly turn its head and give a sinister scowl deadpan into the camera, then fade out. Eventually everyone will be gripped with fear and fall to their knees in tearful regret. They will say, “who is like the muppet god? Who can fight against him?”

As president, I will establish direct communications with the muppet god. I will tell American’s that the muppet god has demanded an end to all country western music, unless it comes from the soundtrack of ‘Every which way but loose’ or ’Any which way you can,’ and that our artists, musicians and performers must recreate the year 1976, as it will symbolize freedom and rebirth, and from now on we must live as a egalitarian society, one devoted to helping our fellow citizens, protecting our environment, reducing our global population, learning good manners, sharing our resources, and rewarding art by individuals, not corporations. The muppet god will personally inform Angelina Jolie that she must be my first lady, and that she will no longer be a UN goodwill ambassador, but will once again take-up knife play and explicit sexual behavior, spending hours at a time beating me up in the oval office, like she did in ‘Meet the Smiths’ to co-star / boyfriend, Brad Pitt. And maybe In the interim, I’ll try and broker a middle-east peace plan and develop a smug British accent.

Because of my presidency, America will once again experience a rebirth in patriotism, in a true democracy and in art. Grandfather’s will hold their grandchildren on their knee and say “I remember a dark time in our history when the terrible ‘muppet god’ came to reap vengeance on mankind, but we have learned, we will live differently now, and you must too, or he will surely return to find you.”

Anyway, that’s what I’d do. . . no dumber than the McCain’s plan, and after two years of Obama you just might want to try it.


[edit on 25-9-2008 by sexysadie]

reply to post by sexysadie


This is the single funniest post i ever read,

I would end the War on Drugs and shut down the prison-industrial complex, in effect legalizing, regulating, and taxing all drugs. I would also legalize prostiturion, gambling, and repeal anti-sodomy laws.

I would pull out of Iraq and shut down all overseas military bases, as well as end foreign and military aid.

I would implement a nationwide school vouvher system and a single-payer healthcare system.

I would repeal public smoking bans and mandatory seatbelt laws.

I would abolish hate crime laws and affirmative action.

I would end corporate welfare, corporate personhood, eminent domain, abolish the federal reserve, and work to encourage self-employment and small business.

I would restore second ammendment rights and private property rights.

I would pull out of NAFTA, WTO, AND THE UN.