So, you've kicked the bucket

I''ve decided to be buried in a poor persons grave, and have the gravestone read "Ha...I am in Heaven!"

In fact I would like that to be true now...unfortunately God is not ready to take me yet; so I have to wait through torment, mental cruelty, harrasment ;people telling horrible lies about me; which forces me into a life of being alone all the time with no friends, no love....the human cruelty is just awful.

somehow I will endure, I feel like Jesus before he was crusified...."My God, My God why hast thou forsaken me"

a reply to: StoutBroux

Important stuff to talk about and -- in the best interest of your surviving family -- to deal with before the event. We always think we have time.

So, like you, we have a bit of property. Although it is not legal where we live to inter cremains on the property, we fully intend to do so anyway. We have already. Four years ago, I formed and cast a 2 X 2 8 cubic foot concrete box. The lid has a recess that fits over the box at grade and we have a bronze plaque affixed to the lid which lists those interred there. So far, it is my friend and ex-boss who died of cancer four years ago. We had his ashes in a 'pirate's chest' I made of local mahogany, and finally put him to rest in the vault. My Bride, me and my Mom all want our ashes to go in the vault. No desire to be scattered at sea, even though it's just a 50 yards away.

I made the thing big, because, hell, who knows, maybe we'll also use it as a time capsule.

I don't understand why it's illegal to scatter ashes or inter them on family property, but I file that under, "don't give a # about foolish laws." Doubt it would be enforced anyway. I would like to start a family tradition of putting our ashes neatly into the vault, and adding that person's name to the bronze plaque.

That was all probably more than you wanted to know.

a reply to: ketsuko

I hope you have fond memories. That's the best of things. I'm sorry for your pain. Perhaps invoking some form of cultural respect can help you get through it.

My father is an original mountain man. When he dies, I will take his cremains on a two-day hike to a special place in the Wind River Range and that will be the end of his story.

In the end, we are obligated to honor the wishes of our loved ones. I personally never want to take up space with my body/casket, etc. If I could be composted and set to infusing plants with my nutrients, that would be my wish, but that isn't a reasonable request within our current society.

a reply to: argentus

Good for you. Got me thinking on my situation.

We scattered my father's ashes in a local water way at a park we used to play at when we were kids. No one else was around and it was a nice cool clear Fall day. Later someone mentioned a question on the legality of dumping ashes in that water way. I saw no reason not to and really didn't care about a law against it. Heck, you can have a BBQ just about anywhere and dump the ashes from your ribs, burgers and dogs and it isn't a big deal. It's organic and isn't much content.

I don't really don't care too much where my ashes go but if I had my druthers, it would be at a beach in Oregon. Preferably Horsfall Beach or further North at Agate Beach. Hmmmm, I don't suppose my kids would want to go on an 'ashes delivery' run when I die, lol.

a reply to: StoutBroux

Good that you recovered your father's body more or less on your own terms.

Ugly truth is that dying is big business for some.

Cheers

a reply to: alexandrae

Sounds like you need a change of location and a new start.

Cheers

( duplicated post )

people should have their last requests written down, just incase. one can make a will cheap if assets are minimal.

it will keep the drama out and be quicker to disperse. and no lawyers needed.

wife and i decided to be scattered, ashes of course.

it still costs tho to do it. in designated places.

funny thing is, i found out we have family cemetary plots after my brother died.

it was only 150 bucks to bury his ashes there, our whole family is there

but it took 17,000 miles 10 grand and 6 months to do it.

long story.

see ya on the flip side.

a reply to: StoutBroux

I'm putting my name down for the next 'Operation Mincmeat', when the good guys fight against Klaus Schwab & his ilk, they can use my body in some sort of deception operation to help overcome their evil empire. Definitely down for that!

If I "kicked the bucket" then I became someone else's problem.

A few months ago, when my best friend's mother died, I told my family that they can do whatever they want with my dead body: a traditional Christian funeral (although I'm an atheist), a cremation or even just sweep me under a carpet, as I'm not very likely to need that body again.

As a kind of a PS, in Portugal, anyone can pay the funeral of someone that was a Social Security contributor, Social Security will pay back up to a specified amount (more than enough for a simple funeral).

a reply to: StoutBroux

You need to right now without delay created a legal document which outlines the ultimate processing of your earthly remains. Imo.

I want my body to either be donated to science or buried in a treepod.

What I really want is to have my body thrown out in the woods for nature to take it's course, but apparently that's illegal and my family refuses to follow through.

originally posted by: StoutBroux
I have thought on this topic often and deep through the past years. Every time there's a funeral I think on it again. Since I live on 8.3 acres, I have wondered about being buried on my own property, how it would be carried out and who would do it. Still working on the details.

When my father died while on a camp out on the Oregon California border I think about 16 or so years ago, another family member and I went to an Oregon rural small town where his body had been delivered. Coming from poor folk, none of us had any money or good credit and since not being involved personally with an after death experience, had NO CLUE as to what was expected. The business holding his body was priced clear out the door. They would not extend us credit for the casket (thank God) and we were in a conundrum. We went back to the even smaller town where my father had been living and spoke to a funeral director in the vicinity. We were told that the body couldn't be held for 'ransom' and could go through any funeral parlor place we wanted. Of course we went with him. He arranged pickup of the body, and we had our father cremated with no body bed as I recall. It cost about $900 I believe and I borrowed the money from a friend. It would have cost us thousands more if we had managed to go through the first place. It still angers me when I think about it. Burying a loved one shouldn't cost so much money.

Many people I know can't afford the end of life costs that have risen so high. I actually thought about building my own casket/coffin to save money. BTW, the difference between the two is one has a narrowing at the base and the other doesn't. They both can be ridiculously expensive.

So I was browsing the other day due to the threads about the increase in deaths and found this site:

funeralcircle.com...

For those of you wanting to only hear the highlights, I'll list a few below. P.S. this is only in the USA so your country of choice may be different.

You don't have to buy a 'body bed' (that's what I am calling a casket/coffin) from the funeral parlor.

Funeral homes have to accept caskets bought elsewhere. Under the Federal Trade Commission’s Funeral Rule, you can purchase a burial container from anywhere or even make one yourself and it must be accepted. Your funeral home or mortuary has no right to refuse a casket from a third-party supplier or charge handling fees to do so.

Caskets can be made of just about anything. I.e. cardboard, woven grass, plywood etc. and can be purchased from a business of your choice or you can make your own.

1. Ensure that your casket adheres to the standards required by the cemetery before buying or making.

Types of Non-Traditional Caskets:

Cardboard Casket ($200+)
Cloth Burial Shroud ($325 – $550) – While not technically a casket, this is a worthwhile mention from a price and sustainability perspective
Woven Fiber Casket ($900 – $2,400+) – This can be made of rattan, seagrass, bamboo, hemp, or even banana leaf.

Or you can go 'bedless' and use a simple shroud. Or your favorite quilt.

If you are also being cremated, the 'body bed' should not contain ANY metal.

Many regular stores sell body beds (who knew, right?)

Amazon
Costco
Sam's Club
Walmart

Now for the fun pictures:

A simple burial shroud I saw on Etsy. Prices vary, $20 on up.

Just thought I'd pass along some information because all of us will be in need at some time in the future and we can save our families a lot of money. and if you want to rent, well that's an option as well.

Rent a Casket
This involves placing the deceased in a simple wooden container that is then inserted into a casket for the service. The wood container is removed from the rental casket after all formalities are done. This practice is becoming more common as the price of funerals increase over time.

A key benefit of this is the cost savings while not having to compromise on having a quality casket during the funeral. While a basic burial container is still used, this is cheaper than forking out for a high-end casket. Your funeral home should have some rental options if you are interested (it can still be pricey to rent so pick an affordable one!). Expect to pay an average of $700 to $1,300 for a rental.

Just tell the living that one day my bones may appear due to critters digging you up . Cool plan though.

a reply to: MeatHookReality


It all breaks down in time.

[Ex] Eventually these too will disintegrate, and after 80 years in that coffin, your bones will crack as the soft collagen inside them deteriorates, leaving nothing but the brittle mineral frame behind. But even that shell won't last forever. A century in, the last of your bones will have collapsed into dust. [/Ex]


It may also depend on if the cemetery uses cement vaults, how wet the soil is and whether it has a lot of clay. Metal rusts and wood rots. I don't believe our bodies were meant to survive forever but I could be wrong.