Hope for people who have lost a loved one

About 10 years ago i met a man through work. He was at least 20 years my senior, but we always had some strange connection. I ended up leaving the job and he was the only person i kept in touch with .Fast forward 7 years and he had come to be one of my best friends. He was something of a mentor to me. One day he called me and asked me to come over, and i could hear in his voice that something was wrong. When i got to his house he informed me that he had throat cancer and that he was dying. From the time he was diagnosed to the time it ultimately took his life was no more than 4 months. During the time he was sick i did everything i could to make sure he was as comfortable as possible, and enjoyed the time i had with him. Before he passed away he thanked me for being such a great friend and helping him through his darkest time and that he was glad he had met me.

After he passed i would always hear his voice. It wasn't an audible voice, but more like i'd get his opinion on things and hear him telling me to be strong when times were tough for me

On the 1st of july i underwent major back surgery. I woke up the next day and can say it was easily the worst day of my life.I wasn't at all prepared for the pain and everything else that goes along with having back surgery. I was a mess, i could hardly pull myself together in the hospital and was seriously regretting getting the surgery. Just as i was at my lowest most hopeless point i all of a sudden felt a calm come over me, and it's almost as if all of the sounds of the hospital disappeared for a few seconds and i heard my friends voice. He was from the islands and had a very distinctive accent, and in the same serious tone he had told me about his cancer in i heard "Hey Chris, they don't want me to be doing this, but you have to stand up, you gotta be strong" . I've always been somewhat of a skeptic when it comes to things like that, but i know what i heard.

The only reason i'm posting this is so that maybe someone who has just lost a loved one can find some solace in knowing that when you need that person the most they are there for you.

If this thread is in the wrong forum i apologize as i'm fairly new to the site

What a heart-warming story. Thanks for sharing it and I hope your back is in tip top shape by now.

My only question is: Who didn't want him to do this? (Talk to you in the hospital I mean?)

Perhaps he/ his soul was still healing and angels didn't want him to come back and visit loved ones so soon?
That's the only thing I can come up with.

I believe your story, especially because my dear grandpa past away 11 years ago, and he still visits me in my dreams, and on occasions when I feel upset or sad, and am alone, I can sense his presence and he comforts me.


S&F
Thanks again for sharing your lovely experience.

Socrates stated :"The mind will find the final truth once it leaves the body". My belief is that the final truth is we are not the body. Consciouness can continue even after the body has been shed. Who you are can't be destroyed. That light in your eyes is your true self. Astral projection proves this point. We wear these bodies while incarnate on the Earth plane. We don't come from dust, we come from spirit.

reply to post by Rainbowresidue

Thanks for the well wishes! I'm definitely starting to feel a little better day by day.

I'm at a loss as to who "they" might be . He never really was one to follow rules, but i took it as "they" didn't want him to contact me so blatently .

The strange part of the story is that a few weeks back my girlfriend went to a bachelorette party for one of her friends.At the party they had a medium there. The medium out of nowhere asked about me, and said that i had an older male spirit that looked after me and who's voice i can hear,and that i'm audio clairvoyant. I don't know so much about the latter, but the former is most certainly true.That actually solidified my belief that what i experienced was real.I've always approached stories about things like this with caution, and have generally leaned towards being skeptical of this type of stuff.It has most certainly opened my eyes though and it's comforting to know that he is still with me. Again, i posted it so that hopefully someone who has just lost someone can hopefully find solace in the fact that they have never really left you

reply to post by Oannes


well said!

reply to post by Haze617

The only reason i'm posting this is so that maybe someone who has just lost a loved one can find some solace in knowing that when you need that person the most they are there for you.

Thank you.

Its hard to post my feelings and give examples because it hurts emotionally to remind yourself of whats gone in the material sense even though spiritually our loved ones are always with us.

I just wanted to say thank you for sharing and for help me strengthen my belief that we are never alone if we have received love and given love in return.


It is solace I have found in words and want to keep on thanking you

so thank you x 1000

reply to post by InhaleExhale


Awesome, honestly it took me awhile to work up the nerve to post my experience . The thought of it helping you has made my day, and no thanks are needed . It is definitely hard to think about people that you have lost, but at the same time it can be very liberating,even more so when others find comfort in what you have to say. So i'll say thanks to you and the others who have responded, as it has most certainly made me feel alot better about putting this out there

thank you i enjoyed your story

as someone once said "we are spirits experiencing the human, not human experiencing spirit"

my best friend died 8 years ago of cancer, she was 40, she was also my brothers partner. Amonth after she died we were both greiving at the kitchen table, i had recently split from an ex she did not like, I was about to ring this ex as i was upset, my brother said don't ring him. As i was about to dial his number a pile of CD's that were sitting near the centre of the table, flew off onto the floor! I do beleive she stopped me from making that call, he was a nasty piece of work.

Originally posted by meremortal
thank you i enjoyed your story

as someone once said "we are spirits experiencing the human, not human experiencing spirit"

my best friend died 8 years ago of cancer, she was 40, she was also my brothers partner. Amonth after she died we were both greiving at the kitchen table, i had recently split from an ex she did not like, I was about to ring this ex as i was upset, my brother said don't ring him. As i was about to dial his number a pile of CD's that were sitting near the centre of the table, flew off onto the floor! I do beleive she stopped me from making that call, he was a nasty piece of work.

Thanks for reading, and i'm sorry for your loss .I I00% believe it was her too, think of all the heartbreak she saved you! it's so nice to hear other people have had similar experiences .

Originally posted by Rainbowresidue

Perhaps he/ his soul was still healing and angels didn't want him to come back and visit loved ones so soon?
That's the only thing I can come up with.

That's actually a very good theory.

reply to post by Haze617


S & F thank you for your honesty-know you are not alone in your connection to the other side(after death) They don't know everything but have a clearer view and understanding that we still have a hard time conceiving. They are not allowed to tell us somethings due to free-will-understanding-freaking us out.
Kind of like-did that just happen or did I just imagine that concept!

Bless Trinity

Originally posted by trinityalways
reply to post by Haze617

 

S & F thank you for your honesty-know you are not alone in your connection to the other side(after death) They don't know everything but have a clearer view and understanding that we still have a hard time conceiving. They are not allowed to tell us somethings due to free-will-understanding-freaking us out.
Kind of like-did that just happen or did I just imagine that concept!

Bless Trinity

Thanks for reading and thanks for s&f . I can totally understand that, if it hadn't been for the experience in the hospital i don't know if i would be as far along as i am in terms of recovery. My quest now is to find out who "they" are. It's puzzling that he said "they" and not "him" . He also isn't the first loved one i've lost, but he is the first one to have reached out to me. The whole thing has left me with so many more questions, and i appreciate those who have responded as knowing i'm not alone makes me feel 100% better

reply to post by Haze617


I always felt that it is taboo on both sides for contact. Living contact or mess with the dead and dead contact or mess with the living..in regards to your friends voice saying "they don't want me doing this".

I recently wrote a letter to my brother who passed and few nights later I felt a chill the next morning my fiancé said she was up all night and felt heavy in the air and was hearing whispering voices. After that I ran out and when I came back I opened my closet and felt that cold again and smelt a smell only associated with my brother. Prior to this we would see something move in that closet at night if door was open. When this took place its like I felt him near me and I got very emotional and there was such a peaceful feeling. I think something I needed cause I felt strong again and happy after this.

I guess the story of Saul and the witch of endor says a lot about contacting the dead.

Originally posted by Johnathanandheather
reply to post by Haze617

 

I always felt that it is taboo on both sides for contact. Living contact or mess with the dead and dead contact or mess with the living..in regards to your friends voice saying "they don't want me doing this".

I recently wrote a letter to my brother who passed and few nights later I felt a chill the next morning my fiancé said she was up all night and felt heavy in the air and was hearing whispering voices. After that I ran out and when I came back I opened my closet and felt that cold again and smelt a smell only associated with my brother. Prior to this we would see something move in that closet at night if door was open. When this took place its like I felt him near me and I got very emotional and there was such a peaceful feeling. I think something I needed cause I felt strong again and happy after this.

I guess the story of Saul and the witch of endor says a lot about contacting the dead.

Thank you for sharing, My condolences go out to you and your family. I am not familiar with the story of saul and the witch of endor , but i am going to look into it. Thanks to all who have responded as it has made me feel alot better and further validates what i happened to me.

Its good that you had your own alleged personal experience. If it puts you at ease anyway.

The problem is, its your own alleged personal experience. None of us can verify it and I personally have not witnessed anything that I would consider spiritual in nature. So I remain skeptical.

My mother claims to have seen her father (my maternal grandfather) standing up and talking to her the moment he died. He told her to take care of her mother (my maternal grandmother) and disappeared. This is the closest story I have and even then it could be that my mother was in an altered state of consciousness due to the stress of the situation and may have been hallucinating.

Originally posted by Haze617

Originally posted by trinityalways
reply to post by Haze617

 

S & F thank you for your honesty-know you are not alone in your connection to the other side(after death) They don't know everything but have a clearer view and understanding that we still have a hard time conceiving. They are not allowed to tell us somethings due to free-will-understanding-freaking us out.
Kind of like-did that just happen or did I just imagine that concept!

Bless Trinity

Thanks for reading and thanks for s&f . I can totally understand that, if it hadn't been for the experience in the hospital i don't know if i would be as far along as i am in terms of recovery. My quest now is to find out who "they" are. It's puzzling that he said "they" and not "him" . He also isn't the first loved one i've lost, but he is the first one to have reached out to me. The whole thing has left me with so many more questions, and i appreciate those who have responded as knowing i'm not alone makes me feel 100% better

Hello:

"They" are the others he is now with in the afterlife. Some of them are what you can consider "teachers" or "guides".

They probably told him not to communicate with you that directly since active involvement in how our lives go is likely seen as "not so beneficial". The idea is that everything has a reason to happen, we have to find solutions ourselves..we have to see for ourselves whether we we can overcome/master obstacles in life. It's the principle WHY we exist in the first place Growing and learning!

He knew that...but at some point he felt he needed to up-lift you and give you a positive kick, regardless what the "rules" are. It's proof that the person cares a lot for you.

Originally posted by Frith
Its good that you had your own alleged personal experience. If it puts you at ease anyway.

The problem is, its your own alleged personal experience. None of us can verify it and I personally have not witnessed anything that I would consider spiritual in nature. So I remain skeptical.

My mother claims to have seen her father (my maternal grandfather) standing up and talking to her the moment he died. He told her to take care of her mother (my maternal grandmother) and disappeared. This is the closest story I have and even then it could be that my mother was in an altered state of consciousness due to the stress of the situation and may have been hallucinating.

I can completely understand and respect your point of view as it is usually the one i have taken in the past . I appreciate you sharing your story about your mother.

Originally posted by NoRulesAllowed

Originally posted by Haze617

Originally posted by trinityalways
reply to post by Haze617

 

S & F thank you for your honesty-know you are not alone in your connection to the other side(after death) They don't know everything but have a clearer view and understanding that we still have a hard time conceiving. They are not allowed to tell us somethings due to free-will-understanding-freaking us out.
Kind of like-did that just happen or did I just imagine that concept!

Bless Trinity

Thanks for reading and thanks for s&f . I can totally understand that, if it hadn't been for the experience in the hospital i don't know if i would be as far along as i am in terms of recovery. My quest now is to find out who "they" are. It's puzzling that he said "they" and not "him" . He also isn't the first loved one i've lost, but he is the first one to have reached out to me. The whole thing has left me with so many more questions, and i appreciate those who have responded as knowing i'm not alone makes me feel 100% better

Hello:

"They" are the others he is now with in the afterlife. Some of them are what you can consider "teachers" or "guides".

They probably told him not to communicate with you that directly since active involvement in how our lives go is likely seen as "not so beneficial". The idea is that everything has a reason to happen, we have to find solutions ourselves..we have to see for ourselves whether we we can overcome/master obstacles in life. It's the principle WHY we exist in the first place Growing and learning!

He knew that...but at some point he felt he needed to up-lift you and give you a positive kick, regardless what the "rules" are. It's proof that the person cares a lot for you.

edit on 21-8-2013 by NoRulesAllowed because: (no reason given)

That actually makes alot of sense to me . At the time, had i not received the "kick" i wouldn't have gotten out of the hospital as quick as i did . When he was alive he actually told me quite often how i needed to "harden up" and if i didn't when something real bad came down the pipe i wouldn't be able to handle it. He most certainly played an integral role in me becoming stronger and learning how to deal with adversity when he was alive, so if what you say is true than it makes perfect sense as to why he felt it necessary to help me at that time. Thanks for your insight !

I say we do the opposite. Damn the hope for people who lost loved ones.

Why? Don't need people going all half cocked on false hopes.

Most major religions shun the possibility of people being ghost beyond the grave once they are dead - ( all Christian religions and other religions that stemmed from the Hebews dispensation.) According to this if Man has a soul once he dies the person either goes to Heaven or Hell. These texts do allow for a few special circumstances ( such as Moses's return) but this is not the norm - other such " beings" are looked at as demons by these texts and we are instructed not to give these things credence. There is also a trap in this because Man should not put his trust in spirits for comfort but in God alone.

Yeah.. I know.. I have seen an apparition of my dad around the time of his death also. There is evidence that scientifically the brain can conjurer up visions and hallucinations of loved ones in times of stress. They have found chemicals released in the brain that cause this such as the experience people have with an Near Death Experience. This is duplicate-able in the lab.

We really cannot know the truth no matter what one believes. It's far better to wish the person a well journey on the way to where ever that soul goes and know that person is Dead never to return.

The comfort should be only to know that the person escaped this horrible world we live in. Throw them a party - Don't dare mourn them. Chances are if they are alive in some form they are way better off now than before.

Originally posted by JohnPhoenix


The comfort should be only to know that the person escaped this horrible world we live in. Throw them a party - Don't dare mourn them. Chances are if they are alive in some form they are way better off now than before.

lol, well i can't really argue with that point