Originally posted by greenovni
Am I RESPONSIBLE for a child that is NOT biologically mine?
You shouldn't be, of course. But 18 years ago you blew it big time. You made the wrong decisions. We can easily chalk that up to a naive 17 year old
who simply did not understand, someone who was bullied by his own mother into accepting paternity. Perhaps many of us here would have been pressured
into the same decisions had we been there. On the other hand we weren't all screwing older women when we were 17 either. Here you are at 35 18 years
later still unable to see your own part in this sorry state of affairs. You appear to accept no responsibility at all when it is your actions that set
this whole train in motion.
1. You slept with her, right? No disagreement. You did.
2. You signed the papers your mother told you, right? No disagreement there either.
The point is that your ACTIONS set this whole thing going. If you had not done either of those things, we wouldn't be having this discussion. You
bear responsibility for that, whether you accept it or not. The fact that you do not is driving a lot of your emotion here. You want to be completely
absolved, which is not going to happen.
Now let's jump to Phase Two here. At some point a DNA test was done, well after the fact. It sounds like it was YEARS, but we're a bit fuzzy on this
point. In any case, this requires the mother's participation. And after the test came back for some reason you say the courts would not accept
And here is where it gets very strange. We have testimony right here on this thread that details what to do by someone who actually works in the
field. You apparently did not do it. You did not avail yourself of legal help. You apparently contacted the wrong authorities. You're trying to do
all this from out of state. It sounds very much as if you were completely inept in dealing with this--just like you were when you were 17.
The fact is that your presentation throughout all this has been completely disorganized, flying from one point to another with no paragraphs, no
logical flow of points. It's a mess! It's taken days of pulling teeth to get the story out of you in a way that we can even understand. Your
timeline is totally screwed.Your opening essay is simply an emotional rant. If this is how you present yourself to the courts or whomever then NO
WONDER you never got anywhere! Quite honestly I really thought we were dealing with a 17 year old right now. I thought, 'wow, this guy has something
going for him if he got a landscaping business going so well at such a young age.'
And now, finally, oh, BY THE WAY, the kid is now 18 and you're 35.
WTF??????? You just didn't happen to mention that before. The kid is now officially an adult. It's over. We're talking about a story from 1995.
In other words, this whole thing is a moot point. The issue is not you paying child support; it is recovering the child support you already paid.
Well, good luck. I hope you win. But get a lawyer. I simply do not believe you can handle doing this on your own.