Not one to post dreams etc but this one really shook me to the core, was vivid, scary, and mind blowingly sick

Maybe as a soldier myself I was manifesting my worst fears in my dreams, and witnessing some bad experiences in waking life bought it on? All I know is that I woke up having a panic attack.. And as a former PTSD sufferer maybe that was a reacurance.. A blip..


All I know is that it felt very real..

So here goes;

I dreamt I was at a friends house with my estranged missus (we are talking again), and her two gorgeous kids who I love like my own.. We were all having a good time, un-wrapping presents, eating mince pies, helping the kids assembe the kids toys (as guys know, its an excuse to have a play ourselves). You get the picture..

When all of a sudden there was shouting and the sound of things getting broken and smashed outside.. There was banging on the window and it smashed.. The scenes outside was one of hundreds of kids rioting.. Hurling bricks at windows, setting fire to cars, having no control and being seemingly led like follow the leader on a rampage.. They tried getting in the house. They had ferral looks on their faces. I cuffed their ears and told them to go home.. They looked almost thankful for the discapline.. The ferral look dissapeared and they looked like kids again.. But the anarchy continued..

The troops came.. They herded the kids together and made a baseline.. Then a few high ranking police officers turned up and made my friends house their HQ.. The crowed was behind the house held in place by the troops.. I got the missus to get the kids away in her car. I escorted her to the car and made sure they got away safe.. I stuck around to help my mate clean up.. And spoke to the officer in command of the troops who I had served with in Northern Ireland and now was a Major.. He pointed to a platoon close by who were armed with Javelin missiles.. He said "these f##kers are dead" to which I said "they are just kids!" He then told me "orders" I said they are illegal then ran to the platoon and begged them to use their right to ignore illegal orders.. They just ignored me and fired..


I will not be too graphic.. But if any of you have witnessed battle you will know the screams, blood, guts, piss and crap, the stink of burnt flesh etc.. All very vivid..

I ran to my mates house.. He was OK but a knock on the window was some kids who had escaped full of total fear and begging us to help them because "the soldiers are coming and we are scared".

That woke me up.. A child scared of those that are duty bound to protect them..


I must apologise for any typos.. And cant edit properly.. Just need answers..

I will not be too graphic