Teen pregnancy low in 'sleepover' country of the Netherlands

Teen pregnancy low in 'sleepover' country of the Netherlands

www.washingtontimes.com

America’s battle over sex education could be boiled down to one question: Would you let your teenager spend the night with his or her sweetheart in your home?
When 32 American parents were asked this question, 29 said no, including one mother who blurted out, “No way, Jose!” said Amy Schalet, author of the new book “Not Under My Roof: Parents, Teens and the Culture of Sex.”

But in the Netherlands, where rates of teen pregnancy, birth and abortion are low, 24 out of 26 parents said that yes, under the right circumstances, they would let their teenager spend the night with their st

(visit the link for the full news article)

As the article says - the US is not quite ready to do what it ACTUALLY takes to reduce unwanted pregnancies - it prefers to think that sex is evil and to be ignored as long as possible.

But at least the question is being put as to how to change this archaic, and, frankly, self defeating attitude.

It takes little imagination to also see the link between "no sex please we're American" and the power of the "religious right".

www.washingtontimes.com
(visit the link for the full news article)

Holland is a very forward thinking country on a lot of issues, obviously the main one being their laws on certain things that I cannot talk about here as my post may get deleted.

Probably because the US lives in a time where they are still introverted and ashamed of sexuality. Responsible parents promote responsible children. It is not surprising the proportion of US parents who said 'no' to allowing a sleep over. All this will do is enforce repression and ensure rebellion and the teens of course will act out and go and have sex anyway, ignorantly and without protection.

Lets face it the typical Amercian is conservative and still locked into the values portayed in the 50's, which IMOA is not a bad thing, manners and courteous etc, yet, sexual repression drives the need to explore which in turn ends up in teen pregnancy.

Education and support is required of course, but that appears to be a long way off

reply to post by Aloysius the Gaul


You know the situation is screwed up.

You see in the West, we tend to over sexualize our youth, yet we punish them for acting on those wishes.

Beer commercials are marketed at teenage boys as MUCH as they are for adults, just because it says 21 and over does not mean they wish to comply with that.

Sex in marketing and entertainment has been ramped up, even in the last ten years. Just watch an episode of Glee or check out the 14 year olds on The X Factor if you don't believe me.

On the other end of the coin we see countries like the Netherlands, who encourage healthy sexual relationships among yound adults. Who educate them early on about sex, the great parts of it and the not so great parts.

They never had one extreme or another. We in the West strive on extremes. We need to find balance and we need to have a conversation among adults. Unfortunetely a lot of the adults in charge are just children posing as adults and they don't have the maturity or the education to make the right decisions.

Of course there's also the whole left vs right. The right being ultra conversative and anti sex and the left being far too hapy with oversexualization of our youth.

I let my daughter's boyfriend sleep over after she turned 17. All I asked is that they were respectfull. I know I could not keep them from having sex, so I would much rather have them do it under my roof, than some highway or some party where there's drugs and alchohol involved.

Before I get my parental head ripped off for the above, I did of course speak with the boys parents and we were actually very active in their relationship in that sense. I believe in raising children from start to finish, and not allowing the media and advertisers to do it in between.

~Tenth

Not trying to sound crass here but they're going do it whatever, so why not just teach them to bag up before hand?

reply to post by magma


Well culture breeds counterculture; if the 50's weren't so repressive, the 60's and 70's wouldn't have been so rebellious. But I agree, demonizing sex and repressing sexuality leads to sexual ignorance in teens.

reply to post by tothetenthpower


All it takes is common sense mate, education at an early age with a more healthier and respectful attitude of the consequences of unsafe sex.

Where I'm from has the highest teenage pregnancy rate in the U.K., it's simple, because sex education is woefully inadequate. Lot of dysfunctional families have kids early and the cycle continues, sometimes it's like contraception doesn't exist here, especially when you see a whole line of teenage kids pushing their babies around.

I think people should seriously consider waiting to have sex until they are prepared to have children and have a partner that they are comfortable with as a parent.

The premise that we need better sex education in America is correct. It should be easier to talk about, and we should be producing sexually smart children.

But I think a part of this is to encourage young people who do not understand the consequences of pregnancy and are not mature enough role models to be a parent to hold off.

Sex shouldn't be shunned as a discussion topic, but it shouldn't be promoted as an ideal hobby for teenagers either.

ETA: To answer the question of whether I'd allow a boyfriend/girlfriend to sleep over at my teenager's house. I'd say yes, I'd allow it. I'm not a parent. But I hope that I can make it known to my future children what my values are and then trust them to make their own decisions. All predicated on the type of person my child is, and their partner. Also, they'd have to be a really mature 16-17, or average 18.

So I wonder how high the true abortion rate is?

We here in the US are eventually going to be forced to evolve/mutate our attitudes about sexuality at some point, but we're still only a couple generations out from when sex was much more easily hidden due to lack of media like tv and interwebs. We're a bit schizophrenic being a highly sexualized society while seemingly having such archaic hangups with it. Maybe a destructive combination.

ETA sex is practically a bodily function. Doesn't seem healthy or natural to brutally suppress it.

reply to post by Zcustosmorum


It's offensive if you ask me. We should all be ashamed for what our children call schools.

I do find myself thinking that education starts at home though and that in the end, parents are wholly responsible for providing them with the proper information.

Another point to mention is that the Netherlands are one of the most secular countries in Europe. Seems in certain areas, when the religious influence isn't as strong, you find people who are better at some things.

Who would have thought?

~Tenth

nudity being common in the Netherlands is one of the biggest reasons for the lower rate.
hawksinholland.blogspot.com...

reply to post by 11235813213455
Holland has one of the lowest recorded abortion rates in the world. It also offers an insight into the cultural drivers that motivate choices between contraception and/or abortion. For instance the abortion rate has risen in Holland in the past few years with the rise in migration. Foreign nationals (non-Dutch), in some provinces, have added some 60% of abortions.

This suggests that national rule and custom has a successful approach to contraception and abortion if we are to rate *success* by low figures.

The UK has been umming and ahing for years about introducing their approach to sex-education and just can't overcome the fear that it'll be political suicide. Will middle-England be able to sleep at night knowing 5-year-olds will see sexual activity (appropriate documentaries) in the controlled environment of school? Heck no! We'd all be murdered in our beds!! It's better to do nothing and blame the high abortion rate, high teen pregnancy rate and bulging care-system on the lowest in society.

reply to post by Aloysius the Gaul


I agree with the Dutch. In fact -- I raise my kids in a similar way. We talk about sex whenever we need to, and we strive to be as open an honest with both kids, as possible. Good stuff, OP!

Originally posted by Kandinsky
reply to post by 11235813213455

 

Holland has one of the lowest recorded abortion rates in the world. It also offers an insight into the cultural drivers that motivate choices between contraception and/or abortion. For instance the abortion rate has risen in Holland in the past few years with the rise in migration. Foreign nationals (non-Dutch), in some provinces, have added some 60% of abortions.

This suggests that national rule and custom has a successful approach to contraception and abortion if we are to rate *success* by low figures.

The UK has been umming and ahing for years about introducing their approach to sex-education and just can't overcome the fear that it'll be political suicide. Will middle-England be able to sleep at night knowing 5-year-olds will see sexual activity (appropriate documentaries) in the controlled environment of school? Heck no! We'd all be murdered in our beds!! It's better to do nothing and blame the high abortion rate, high teen pregnancy rate and bulging care-system on the lowest in society.

I knew someone would have this exact response. That's why I said "true" not reported.

reply to post by 11235813213455
I knew your response would be the one you just made too so we're both right.