So, I find that although I am able to relate to secular women fairly well, I do not think they are conducive to what I want in a relationship, which
is exclusivity, trust and getting to know each other on a deep level, as well as a life-long commitment. It is definitely possible for some people to
do this in a secular way, but I have read the writing on the wall and it is not for me.
So we approach the gambit.
I have a lot of experience in life as a Christian, growing up in a Episcopalian family - unlike everyone's views about Christianity, my family
believed in science, believed in helping others and believed in treating everyone well. This included gays, atheists, black people, whatever - I never
experienced anything at all like what people say religion is nowadays. Sure, we didn't do drugs or have sex with multiple partners at the same time,
but that also brought with it a level of comfort, some order, and trust.
Enter college. I went to an extremely liberal college (very likely the most liberal one in the nation), that had a bar on campus, and once a month the
cafeteria workers brought kegs out to the quad and poured free beer for everyone stopping by.
At first, I was at odds with the feminist faction at the college, which had a large hold on politics, and eventually a monopoly in the later years. I
didn't agree with some of their views - namely restricting freedom of speech and supporting a culture where exclusive relationships were shunned. I
wrote some controversial music that was meant to provoke discussion on how sex was being treated as more important than the relationships between
So, you might think that I would have continued this train of though, which some of you would consider motivated by my religious past, but that is not
Instead, I decided to listen to the feminists, I spent the last three years of college hanging out with girls, learning as much as I could about the
philosophy and, not on purpose, ended up making best friends with a gay guy. I started a new band with him as the lead singer, which I am still in
today (although he got married).
The question, of course, as we approach the gambit, has as much to do with religion as relationships. Like I said before, I have read the writing on
the wall, and a secular relationship won't work for me. As I approach the stage in life, I have to make a choice.
So a choice? What kind of choice?
Well, I've gone and done it. I have contacted two people that I am interested in dating - one is a Christian girl, and the other is a gay, black man.
Both seem to be quality people.
Am I going to date the Christian, and lead an exemplary lifestyle, marry, have kids, and continue my original vision of Christianity - to help others
and accept all -
Or, am I going to become gay and start writing a blog on feminism from a vantage point where I am safe to promote women's rights without having to
worry about being persecuted for being either a straight man or a Christian?
Probably neither. But I gave the universe a choice, and we shall see what happens.
edit on 28-8-2012 by darkbake because: (no reason