"Help, quick – I’ve unscrewed the top on a ticking bomb"

martinskinner.wordpress.com...

Like any responsible parent, I would not leave a loaded gun in the children’s playroom or keep my painkillers in their sweetie tin. But it turns out that for two years there has been a nuclear bomb in one of my kitchen cupboards, between the tomato ketchup and the Rice Krispies.

"Be careful with your novelty Hot Sauce!" I guess is the moral we are supposed to take away.

Well, that’s what it says on the tin. But I don’t believe it. I think it’s made from uranium, plutonium, fertiliser, sulphuric acid, nitric acid, hydrochloric acid and ammonia, with a splash of mace. I do not believe it’s a foodstuff. It’s a weapon.

Oh.....this was priceless!!!!!


S&F

The pain started out mildly, but I knew from past experience that this would build to a delightful fiery sensation. I was even looking forward to it. But the moment soon passed. In a matter of seconds I was in agony. After maybe a minute I was frightened that I might die. After five I was frightened that I might not.

Oh, my. This is a riot....

Originally posted by sonnny1

Well, that’s what it says on the tin. But I don’t believe it. I think it’s made from uranium, plutonium, fertiliser, sulphuric acid, nitric acid, hydrochloric acid and ammonia, with a splash of mace. I do not believe it’s a foodstuff. It’s a weapon.

Oh.....this was priceless!!!!!


S&F

I too thought this work is a priceless masterpiece. The main character is deep and conflicting. The overarching conflict is a gripping and dark epic. The villains character development is subtle, yet masterfully developed. The conclusion was satisfying while still leaving room for a sequel, or perhaps a spin off.

I give this story a 10 out of 10

Originally posted by SLAYER69

The pain started out mildly, but I knew from past experience that this would build to a delightful fiery sensation. I was even looking forward to it. But the moment soon passed. In a matter of seconds I was in agony. After maybe a minute I was frightened that I might die. After five I was frightened that I might not.

Oh, my. This is a riot....

It had its moments of comedy, though the focus is clearly Drama/Horror.

everything2.com...

reply to post by TsukiLunar


Nice Find actually!!

Yeah, I could "feel" all the pain, he tasted.

reply to post by TsukiLunar


I love spicy foods.
The hotter the better. Yeah, yeah, I normally pay for it in the ----> end

reply to post by TsukiLunar

LL

That was a brilliant story!

Awesome!

That Pizza.. I just found out about it. Joe Mamas is down the street... The same one they are at...I am doing it guys... Wish me luck.

reply to post by TsukiLunar


Oh SNAP!!!



Good Luck Brother !!!

So funny! My Mother made her own taco sauce, one year it was bad, your eyes watered just walking in the house when it was cooking on the stove. She canned it anyway. It dissolved the rubber lining on the lids and ate the metal.

that was great. I got a little overzealous with the hot sauce the other nigjt and as slayer said was paying for it the next day. Now I want to try this stuff. Masochism. Good find.

reply to post by Iamschist




I wonder how well it will strip paint?

Originally posted by SLAYER69
reply to post by Iamschist

 

I wonder how well it will strip paint?

Would it kill a tapeworm?

reply to post by TsukiLunar


The three stooges.....


"I want two rotten eggs, sour milk and some burnt toast!"

"Why"

"Because I have a tapeworm and that's good enough for him!"

forums.webrats.com...

The following morning I was in no need of an alarm clock. My stomach was churning, and making noises that surely weren't natural. As I swung my legs out of bed, I doubled up in pain, and squatted down on bent knees. Already I could feel my colon starting to contract, and as my stomach gave another mystical churn, I wondered if I would make it to the toilet in time.

" After maybe a minute I was frightened that I might die. After five I was frightened that I might not."

I LOVE that line