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February 22, 2012
I dreamed last night that I was walking, sky-clad, through an endless middle-eastern desert. I was being guided by Inanna; Queen of Heaven, mother of the Earth, and goddess of the Morning Star. She was walking me away from the safety of the civilizations of mankind, represented in the dream by the ruins of once-great cities. As I walked toward her, her presence moved ever-further from me, and eventually my bare feet began to turn into a chalky-black charcoal. With each step my flesh turned to cinders and was stripped away, coming off in ribbons and motes, as it danced across the empty space on the terrible desert wind which had begun to blow.
My sojourn stretched forth, as I journeyed out of the familiarity of common human culture, and found myself alone in the expanse of the Earth herself. No cities, no people, no technology. Only nature, and her natural chaotic balance: the blazing sun above, the water of the Earth before, the air all about, and the dry desert sands below. Upon this realization my ankles turned from ash to clay, degrading into a soupy mixture, toppling my posture, and I collapsed face-first into the red sands of the empty space. I shattered then, becoming a hundred million motes of sand on the desert breeze.
I was lifted on high, myself as these myriad fragmentary aspects of personality, appearance, consciousness, will, memory, thought, and emotion. In my lifting I was discarded, carried on the sea of wind across the empty space; scattered, deposited across the world; left to be reclaimed by the sphere which had set me free. In this dissolution of my sense of self, I was sublimated into something wholly more complete. An unrestrained notion of connectivity and consciousness washed over me, high above and beyond my sense of personal individualistic identity.
I had become whole in the act of becoming undone.
May 20, 2012
A dream of standing barefoot in the empty space. (Name removed) is wrapped up in my arms. Her head is resting against my chest, my chin locks her in place. We are naked, as a sudden inner-warmth surrounds us. The sky explodes a violet color, and rains down in rivers of blue, green, and red; all the while blazing a brilliant white in alternating flashes and swirls.
Andromeda has come. Her and our Milky Way are melting seamlessly into one. I know this without understanding it. The instability of existence unfurls before my eyes, as I hold tight to (name removed).
I feel that this is how the world ends. Barefoot in the empty space, (name removed) wrapped tightly in my arms, as one galaxy melts into another; like her into I. An Ouroboros of human flesh, and Universal soul. Alchemy; a philosophers stone. Eternal life as event horizons collide. We are permanent, as eternity flashes by in a split-second.