The vectorial nature of emotions.

I'm developing a new philosophy that all emotions are applicable for a situation, but as they arise, in order for them to have any applicable value, they must be directed in the proper direction.

That is, anger is okay to have, but doesn't serve a beneficial purpose unless it is directed appropriately. For example, I say something mean to my girlfriend and she gets mad at me. I see her anger and I react with anger towards her in an effort to defend myself. This would be the inappropriate response. The proper action would be- when I said something mean and she got mad at me, I should have gotten mad at myself for saying something mean instead of defending, and standing by what I originally said.

Anger, in that situation, went from destructive to constructive and allowed me to learn from it. It was the same emotion, arising from the same action, but consideration was given to which direction it should be directed and becoming angry at myself, rather than her, not only resolved a conflict, but also presented an opportunity to correct my behavior for the future.

Can you think of other emotions that can transform a destructive outcome into a constructive outcome and vice versa all because of how they were directed?

Maybe you're onto something, but you needn't have got angry with yourself in order to learn.

Originally posted by smithjustinb
I'm developing a new philosophy that all emotions are applicable for a situation, but as they arise, in order for them to have any applicable value, they must be directed in the proper direction.

That is, anger is okay to have, but doesn't serve a beneficial purpose unless it is directed appropriately. For example, I say something mean to my girlfriend and she gets mad at me. I see her anger and I react with anger towards her in an effort to defend myself. This would be the inappropriate response. The proper action would be- when I said something mean and she got mad at me, I should have gotten mad at myself for saying something mean instead of defending, and standing by what I originally said.

Anger, in that situation, went from destructive to constructive and allowed me to learn from it. It was the same emotion, arising from the same action, but consideration was given to which direction it should be directed and becoming angry at myself, rather than her, not only resolved a conflict, but also presented an opportunity to correct my behavior for the future.

Can you think of other emotions that can transform a destructive outcome into a constructive outcome and vice versa all because of how they were directed?

I see that the situation in which you outlined for us was dealt with inappropriately, regardless of if said person was to be angry at ones self, or continuing to defend what was originally said. The emotion, and set behavioral pattern that lead to the comment in the first place is what should be addressed.

There is a cause and effect at play, and to address the root is the most appropriate manner in which to find change, and develop a different means of addressing or communicating with another individual.

I'm not implying that the witnessing of emotions such as anger can't have positive effects, but that is entirely dependent on the individual. The ''bully' or strategically applied anger mentality will ultimately always fail in the long run, for what it breeds, time will manifest... and the result of which tends to be once again anger.

This is why.. long ago, a little thing called temperance entered the discussion, which is the means of acting through wisdom, maintaining and building character or soul and dissolving of ego. Although the ego part is up for debate I suppose.

You want to be angry at yourself? Good, tell me how that works out for ya.

You want to act in accordance with what is conducive towards happiness and good? Find some restraint, empathy, and use temperance. But meh... wisdom is bleak, and that's what a wise man told me.