posted on Dec, 28 2011 @ 11:21 AM
Very nice post!
I enjoy the book of Job because I can understand it somewhat in comparison to my own life. Not exactly, no, but I can pull alot of similarities from
my life and compare them with Job.
The question/problem/turmoil I have is... Why must man endure so much pain on earth, loose his wife, his home, his belongings.... all for a reward
herafter? Why not just go strair to herafter and recieve bliss, instead of having to live a life of hell just to get there...
And.. since you're man, you dont know the way, you dont know truth.. You have to figure it out by digging through all the rubbish with hopes on
finding the right answer. Is it fair for man to be temped and pulled away every day when man is weak. It's like looking at a world of people and
knowing that only a very small portion will make it out just the right way enough to get to the reward in the end. Meanwhile, a world of anguish,
unhappyness, pain and suffering continues to exist all around us, but not everyone makes it through, but mostly everyone has to endure that unjustice
We're made to live in mystery.. To find out on our own.. At least the Jews had a visible flame/cloud/voice to base their beliefs on. All we have
are 6000 years of total confusion brought on by the people before us, and the people before them.. to finaly end up in a world at the very end with
the utmost confusion, no guidance except from people who cant even agree among themselves. Every religion, every person, every single one, will have
We hear.. "Read the bible.. the answers are there". Same with the Koran, Kabbala, and other books. How can we even know that we're reading the
right book for the right answers? Wouldnt each one be just as credible to their own sect and less credible to others?
Yet, we stay here on this blue ball, awaiting a salvation to come after the ultimate end here in a world in which we are placed to be born and raised
in this material world, as we know nothing else.. Only to be told, you suffer here so you can get your reward in the next life. This is but a step
before the real life.
In this life you will suffer.. You will lose your wife, your family, your heart, your love, your feelings, your happyness, your everything that you
ever knew from the moment you opened your eyes. But you have to suffer and learn from your suffering, because if you dont, you will suffer again in
the next life, but this time for eternity.. no death will save you from that suffering.
In the next, IF you do the right thing, without any real note of which belief you should believe in, you will make it to heaven and live in eternal
bliss, without lovedones for all in heaven are as the angels.. No wife, no children, just everyone the same, looking to one another as equals, not
what you had here on earth, but a seperation from belonging to any specific family, instead part of one big family. I understand there is pride
involved, but unfortunatly that seems to be an inate ability that we can do nothing about here on earth. We can fight it, but why? We wake up
another day with the same feelings.
I cant imagine not looking at my child as my child in heaven, yet looking on them as just another angel. Love included or not. Maybe that's why
I've never had my own children. My punishment for feeling this way?
I find that, if I believe, every little mistake I make (against my beliefs and God), I am penalised for it. Something happens where I know my
mistake. I've got scars on my fingers for just such occassions. Doing something with tools, or a knife for example, thinking mean things (it
happens, some things will frustrate us) yes, slip... *&^#@$ Damnit!! Need a bandaid!
This has happened all my life. Maybe it's just my own self fullfillments, I dont know. But I do feel like I'm constantly pushed to or not to do
something by some unseen force simply because I believe.
After I lost the love of my life... she broke one of the big commandments... (she didnt believe in them anyways), I struggled with my faith for a
year.... Then I just stopped and didnt care to believe anymore. Then when Id think of bad things.. nothing would happen. I felt free... but more
lonely than when I started down this road. Now.. Anger.. confusion.. rebelious (slightly).. defiant at times... Simply because I no longer feel that
I am being watched over. I no longer feel that I am allowed in grace. And most of all, I feel God doesnt listen to me anymore, or he simply doesnt
care from my failure.. given up on me? The things promised in the bible when you feel/believe just doesnt seem to work. It couldnt be from a lack of
faith. Maybe I'm wrong, but I beleieve that if you pray everyday and talk to God often when you're alone, that alone should constitute more faith
than a mustard seed.. Yet, my mountain stands firm and will not budge! Still I cannot rebuke, curse, or hate God for my own doings. Still..