I had a few good laughs and found some interesting truths amongst these and the others found here...Enjoy.
www.scribd.com...
2000 B.C. - Here, eat this root. 1000 A.D. - That root is heathen. Here, say this prayer. 1850 A.D. - That prayer is superstition. Here, drink this
potion. 1940 A.D. - That potion is snake oil. Here, swallow this pill. 1985 A.D. That pill is ineffective. Here, take this antibiotic. 2000 A.D. -
That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root.
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2B or not 2B? I think it's a grade of pencil.
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3 nails + 1 cross = 4 given.
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43% of all statistics are worthless.
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668: The Neighbour of the Beast.
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7/5th of all people do not understand fractions.
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90% of men kiss their wife goodbye when they leave the house. The
rest kiss their house goodbye when they leave the wife.
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A baby sitter is a teenager acting like an adult while the adults are
out acting like teenagers.
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A banker is someone who lends you an umbrella when the sun is
shining, and who asks for it back when it start to rain.
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A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist.
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A bicycle can't stand on its own because it's two-tired.
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A bird does not sing because it has an answer -- it sings because it
has a song.
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A boy, frustrated with all the rules he had to follow, asked his father, "Dad, how soon will I be old enough to do as I please?" The father answered
immediately, "I don't know. Nobody has lived that long yet."
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A brook would lose its song if God removed the rocks.
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A budget is just a method of worrying before you spend money, as
well as afterward.
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A budget is something we go without to stay within.
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A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as
when you are in it.
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A calm sea does not make a skilled sailor. (African proverb)
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A camel is a horse designed by a committee.
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A candidate is someone who gets money from the rich and votes
from the poor to protect them from each other.
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A candle brightens the world around it. Unfortunately, it creates a
shadow of its own. It still serves the purpose it is meant for.
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A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.
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A careless word may kindle strife. A cruel word may wreck a life. A
timely word may level stress. A loving word may heal and bless.
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A celebrity is someone who works hard all his life to become known
and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognised.