What happens to men over 40?

Would like to ask if any of you know if all men don't like sex after they turn 40. My hubby has some issues that can't be explained by emotional states, or medical reason, or if he is just one of those people that once you get married everything changes. We have only been married for 2 years and since the wedding everything has just been down hill. i can say that it wsnt like this b4 we got married. help please!

Men over fourty goes through life changing just like womens, in other words they get menopause, ha,ha,ha, I guess your hobby wanted a nice lady like you to share his life. maybe sex is not on his mind right now, but as long as he love you I guess is ok.

been i am not any where near 40, i don't really know any solution to the problem. but a man who doesn't like sex? amazing.... well either

1. you can wait and see what happnes
2. marriage counsler?
3. try sex toys?

whatever it is, he'll come around, sex can never be apart from males for a long time.

KSmith,

My husband is 42, and we've been married for a year now, and suddenly he's become sexless...

whenever I want it he doesn't, when he wants it it's out of the blue, when we do it it's only once in a day, maybe once a week. It sucks, i've had to put myself to bed with my friendly hand a few nights all the while thinking of me and him ... oh the memories.

Thats all I have, I truly believe he is going through some menopause, and i totally agree with the part abouthim wwanting to share his life with me..

He totally does, and thats really sweet and nice. But I want sex damnit!!!

well maybe you waited too long to get married. i know that yournger married couples, say mid 20s to early 30s need dynamite to get them off of each other. i mean they pick fights just to make up and have sex. thats what i think, but im an 18 year old virgin what do i know.

actually i'm 21 and he's 42 so i'm the one with the sex drive and he's stalled... I don't know what the problem is........
he says either' im too tired' or 'not right now' and never is a good time unless we're in the hot tub and he sees me caught in the moment, then wam! he's all over it... but sometimes i say no cuz i don't want to in the hot tub... so it's never a good time....
i like night time, the bedroom just has this romantic feeling in it and I want to get frisky, but he gets pissed and wants tog o to bed...
THen he says '"i wanted to do it today but you didn't want to"" ......
if i'm in the hot tub during the day i want to relax!! not to mention i don't want chemical water going up my hoo hoo. talk about a ph imbalance!
ew.

I'm not familiar with the situation but thought I would mention that I remember reading of the possibility that some low fat or other diets may lower testerone levels which would of course lower the sex drive etc. I also believe there are more dangerous food items in our environment that have estrogen effects which is not good for men but I don't know much about that. That's just something I read or heard somewhere. I'm not over 40 yet but I know that exercise tends to increase the sex drive too besides making me feel good in general.

I work out and feel good too, he doesn't and I try to get him too but he just dismisses it...

Maybe he depressed? He works alot, he own his own business so he has alot on his plate, not tomention we just moved and he's doing alot around here, so he never really gets time to himself... stress could be a factor...

i'll have to give him more back rubs when I see him...

Well you may have solved your own question. Moving, stress, and worries can all play havoc with health and sex drive I believe. I'm not a medical expert but it makes sense to me if someone isn't relaxed but stressed out.

maybe hes past his peak sex drive.

i am only 34, but you know, it may be true. he may have passed his peak. well, now what? i dont want to trade him in on a younger model. as for being 20 something and with the 42 yr old, well maybe we both should have thought about this decision of an older guy huh?

ksmith,

He was a wild monkey boy in bed before we got married, and I mean freaky.. It was great, now he's too tired and blames the sexless marriage on me because apparantly I never want to with is bs..... So he's playing reverse psychology..

Maybe he is past his sex drive although he claims to really enjoy it, we still have sex just not the crazy fun stuff like how it used to be.....Oh yes and the sex isn't frequent, it doesn't even deserve a checkmark on the sometimes point..

More around "rarely"

Being 20 and in 'my prime' (so they say) my sex drive is through the roof. My member is a dictator and controls my body. If it says do this, i do it, if it says do that, i do it. My sex drive is going through the roof and it gets worse and worse... i cant comprehend how a guy can lose this. But i have heard that coz guys have their prime earlier in life they are more likely to 'burn out' earlier too... but if that happens to me, i will just buy some viagra and keep at it...

hat you need to do is feed you husbands aphrodisiacs (this is for both of the ladies experiencing female versions of 'blue balls', no offence i hope), strawberries, oysters, dark chocolate, porn, viagra... get a natural remedy book and they'll tell you how to make your hubbys the cassanovas they once were

Well, I can fill you in on this one. Being 42 myself I can tell you that the drive is still there. Problem? Too damn much going on. Work, commuting, housework, yes guys got to pitch in there too, kids homework, paying bills, online when possible, by the end of the day, phew, I'm tired. It's not that the drive isn't there, I just don't think about it. When the wife takes the initiative, it's like, "oh yeah, damn good idea." Be playful, it will pay off.

Well, I can't speak for the others that have this problem ( if you wanna call it that), but in my house taking on the role of a leader in bed doesnt work either. In the begenning, which wasn't that long ago he was a hound. Now it's like he is settled and comfortable. Just has no desire to do it at all. I always tell him " Use it or lose it." Doesn't work either. Guess there is no hope for the sexually deprived lol.

Originally posted by intrepid
Well, I can fill you in on this one. Being 42 myself I can tell you that the drive is Problem? Too damn much going on. Work, commuting, housework, yes guys got to pitch in there too, kids homework, paying bills, online when possible, by the end of the day, phew, I'm tired. It's not that the drive isn't there, I just don't think about it.

That is exactly it, as we were sitting in the hot tub last night he even said it... I was actually fishing abit to try and figure out why, so I asked him how he was with the stress ect, and he took a deep breath and started going on about how the past two months have been crazy and he's glad it's almost done... We just moved, there's been alot of painting, carpeting, moving things in and around, putting things back together ect...

So thats what it is, and after I got him to spill the beans then we had a little nookie which was nice because for once he was really #ing good, I sat there in the hot tub out of breath, speechless, and very satisfied...
And then he goes

"See I still got it" LOL... That's right, he does and he didn't forget either...

God bless him...

Originally posted by KSmith69
Well, I can't speak for the others that have this problem ( if you wanna call it that), but in my house taking on the role of a leader in bed doesnt work either. In the begenning, which wasn't that long ago he was a hound. Now it's like he is settled and comfortable. Just has no desire to do it at all. I always tell him " Use it or lose it." Doesn't work either. Guess there is no hope for the sexually deprived lol.

I know what you mean KSmith, it sucks when all you got is yourself and memories of way back when lol..
Maybe one night you should relax him, rub his back and shoulders, pour him a drink, and kiss his neck... Hopefully then it'll be hard for him to resist his spring loaded bootyha and you can take it from there...
Try it out and let me know how it works lol...

Good luck and God speed!

Edit: forget the "and"

[Edited on 9-7-2004 by TrueLies]

I am over 50 and still do the nasty


I dont have the urgancy I used to but hell, I am over 50, try coming on to him, I know NOTHING turns me on like a woman that wants it.

NOW!

LOL

I will bump this thread in a year and a half or so to give you my personal account.

Really I feel like I am still young at almost 39... But everyone says that all changes after 40 :bnghd:



Gazz

Originally posted by UM_Gazz
I will bump this thread in a year and a half or so to give you my personal account.

Really I feel like I am still young at almost 39... But everyone says that all changes after 40 :bnghd:
Gazz

Really? I pegged you a lot younger than that. Still 3 years younger than me. How does your cane hold up?