me & my gf want a baby but....

well we are a couple (females) and have been together 6years nearly 7 we are wanting a baby to complete the family, we have thought this out very much,

the trouble is we need sperm, I have asked a few male friends who said no and one that said yes is gay and sleeps around so that's a no no in my books due to virals etc.

Has anyone on here been through this or know where and what clinics, I have looked online and I am not sure who or what company is right or the procedures.

any advice, I am UK

I wouldn't mind donating. Hopefully that doesn't sound weird to you. :/
I don't know anything on this subject; Still I hope the best for you.

Not knowing where you live for availability but there are sperm banks. Maybe some online research would give you locations and cost.
Good luck!

reply to post by jumpingbeanz


Talk to your doctor. He/She would be able to provide a reliable recommendation.

Random forum - not so much.

Good luck. I hope it all works out for you both.

[edit on 1-7-2010 by LadySkadi]

problem is I cannot understand a word my doctor says...
I hate going there because I can't translate what he says ever!

reply to post by jumpingbeanz


You should search online and use Yahoo Answers. I'm sure there have been people in your shoes before. I would love to help an any way.

reply to post by jumpingbeanz


Um ... ok.

Why are you with this doctor then?

That makes zero sense to me.

reply to post by jumpingbeanz


I understand maternal feelings but raising a kid is much more than just completeing a family.

First get a dog to take care of; then magnify that by a factor of 1000 and you might get some idea of what it takes to raise a child.

Always check your motivations.

You want a child to complete your family?

What about all those childless couples?

Are they not a family?

If that is your motivation,you two have some serious issues other than lacking a penis and sperm.

Couples have children to ensure their legacy.

Which one of you is going to carry the child to term?

Originally posted by jumpingbeanz
the trouble is we need sperm, I have asked a few male friends who said no and one that said yes is gay and sleeps around so that's a no no in my books due to virals etc.

Can't you just ask that he be tested? I am sure he would understand.

I have already had a dog for 5years already and numerous other pets, and also grow my own veg.
I do want to ensure the legacy and I want to give birth myself,

We feel that the time is right to start a family, I have recently also decorated the back room already and completed the house renovations.

I was hoping for someone on ATS to have been through this already in the UK who can shed some light on this matter,

the friend who said he would is also unreliable so getting him turning up for tests would be a let down in my books.

I am a knowledgeable young lady who would hopefully bring a wonderful little person into this world and teach them everything I have learned and already know with a loving family behind her/him.
I have also picked names since I was a child

Haney James (boy)
Alicia Joyce (girl)

Learn to internet

I agree with the poster who said you really should talk to your doctor about this, they'll know better than any of us who's good in your area.

Another option would be to go to a site like www.whattoexpect.com where they have forums full of women who are pregnant/want to be pregnant and ask for a recommendation there.

edit to add: specifically, ask your doctor for the name of someone who specializes in IUF/IVF (intrauterine fertilization/in vitro fertilization). That should get you to a different doctor. If you still don't understand what they're saying and they can't seem to adjust their communication so that you can, then ask for another referral. It just seems to me that pregnancy is no time to rely on a doctor you can't understand.

[edit on 7/2/2010 by americandingbat]

I'm going to echo Lady Skadi's advice, and say go to the doc, but also add that first, you need to be sure you can carry a baby to term...make sure you know all potential health threats, etc.

Even if you don't know what your doctor is saying (and I'll again echo LadySkadi's concern here)...he/she should be able to recommend a specialist in this area to help guide you...(and make sure you won't have any legal entanglements for custody...which is another reason to use a respected clinic vs. a friend...

I saw your comments on a legacy, etc., so I'm assuming adoption is off the table...(myself, I'm in favor of skipping the midnight feeding period, and heading right to the kid can talk...but to each their own... ) Not to mention of course, providing a home to a child in need...but I do understand the legacy issue too...so don't feel I'm harping on it.

Protect yourself health-wise, and legally, and rely on professional advice to make it happen for you. Best of luck.

reply to post by jumpingbeanz



Oh my, you need another Dr. - its important to know what your Dr. is saying to you - otherwise someone there that can translate.

reply to post by jumpingbeanz


Then why do you go to a dr. you can/'t understand?

I like the idea of a sperm bank. No connections, just numbers.

please only reply if you have been through the same experience etc

reply to post by jumpingbeanz


Why limit your feedback? (and, there really isn't a way to police it...), but you can certainly make the request...(but don't be surprised when it falls into the thread abyss...)

female couple
in England
wanting a blood-relative baby
ATS members

Kind of narrows down the field more than a bit.....

[edit on 6-7-2010 by Gazrok]

Originally posted by jumpingbeanz
please only reply if you have been through the same experience etc

Do you think ats would have a higher rate of lesbian couples wanting sperm donations for impregnation? or do you think ats men would have more worthier sperm than other internet sites?

If so.. why? I am very interested in your answer.


....very.

Gazrok has a point. The chances of someone going through exactly the same thing who just happens to also come from the UK are probably very small.

[edit on 6-7-2010 by riley]

reply to post by riley


i think your reading into this way too much, i am after information not members
lol