Hallmark Cards That Aren't (Yet)

# Gee, Sorry You Got Herpes (or the more pointed Sorry I *Gave You* Herpes)
# Apparently internet dating ain't what you thought it was...
# Bummer about your candidate card (sent to libertarians every four years)
# the all-purpose Sarah Palin card (open it up, there's nothing inside)
# the What's Four Feet of Snow Between Friends card
# Sorry I Finished Too Fast card
# the Obama card (promises money inside but it just costs a lot more)
# MAC card (elegant cover, overpriced, requires Steve Jobs' permission to sign)
# the Dick Cheney card (now with anthrax)
# the Sorry I Boinked Your Daughter card
# the Windows card (you have to keep re-signing it)
# the Newt Gingrich card (it's a Christmas card - no, it's a Hanukkah card!)
# Sorry I was Wearing Your Underwear card
# the Snuggie card (it's a regular card, you doofus)


I need your suggestions.
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