Overcoming Onanism.

Do you think Onanism is wrong Jesus said "But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart." (Matthew 5:28 KJV)

If so any tips on how to stop lust and Onanism?

reply to post by TinFoilHatMan55


Without wishing to be disrespectful to your faith, I simply must point out the rather paradoxical result of combining the words "onanism" and "overcoming" .... I was going to use 'outcome' instead of 'result' but that would have been too much.

I don't care what they say, the art of irony is alive and well.


I was aware that masturbation is a sin in the catholic tradition, but was not aware that all denominations were as strict, but then again I get my catochism from watching "The Meaning of Life" so it's probably innacurate. Man there's a lot of rules to this thing.


[edit on 29 Jan 2010 by schrodingers dog]

I think that as far as the Church is concerned, it follows a
rather antiquated interpretation of Natural Law, as it does with
all things sexual, including birth control. Moses told Onan 'better
to leave your seed in a whore than to spill it on the ground.'

The Church considers any sexual activity that doesn't allow for
pro-creation a sin. This is also included in the argument against
homosexuality, no pro-creation possible.

Whether masturbation is a sin depends on whether or not there
was willingness and consent, and awareness it was a sin, and
not a compulsive or obsessive act.


Jesus' warning against lust already adultery in the heart is sorta
like being a thief. One is not a thief because he steals, he steals
because he is first, a thief.

It helps to remove the typical gateways to the temptation. There is a program called SafeEyes I have on my computer that automatically blocks pornographic websites, or ads for such sites. By removing the visual temptation, the whole lust thing loses a lot of ground.

So far as the woman on the street goes, I personally would pray for strength (fixing your eyes on Christ helps, and I find prayer helps me fix 'em on Christ), and do what the author of Every Man's Battle calls a bounce -- when your eyes are drawn to an attractive or revealed woman, look somewhere else. At first, it's difficult, but eventually it can become habit to the point of no longer even looking.

If you're really interested in stopping the whole lust thing, I highly recommend the book I mentioned above, Every Man's Battle: Winning the War on Sexual Temptation One Victory at a Time. It was something that really helped me in that battle. What's more, it gave me hope that it could be overcome. Our society today tells us that masturbation not only is ok, but it's not healthy not to. It'll even go on to say men can't resist the urge to do so.

When you look at all the ads out there, and what marketing focuses on, it makes sense -- many products appeal to men through sex, and if they can drive it into our heads that we're helpless to resist, it makes the ads that more effective. There is hope, though, and this battle can be won.

reply to post by schrodingers dog


It's not rules so much as self-control and a devotion to God.

Christ did say that to look at a woman in lust in your mind is akin to breaking the commandment, and most Christians believe what the Bible says. Therefore, lust is a sin. Is masturbation a sin? Well, if you can do it without thinking of a woman (or man), no, not as such. However, I've never spoken with a person who has said they've been able to do this.

It is that lust, which leads to the objectification of women and a lack of self-control, be it sleeping around or just having to masturbate to get it out of your system, that is going against God's will for us.

If you fall into it, though, the Bible is also clear that there is grace and forgiveness for our sin. Romans 8:1 says there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, and First Corinthians points out that when we do fall short of Christ by sinning, God's grace covers the sin and the Holy Spirit gives us the strength to resist future actions along the same line.

To say Christianity is a bunch of rules is to be in agreement with the Pharisaical lawyers Jesus often slammed in the gospels. It's about a relationship with Christ, not following a bunch of rules. When He said, "If you love me, you'll keep my commandments," He wasn't saying, to prove you love me, keep my commandments. Instead, He was saying a natural outflow of a love of Christ is a desire to keep His commandments, just as a natural outflow of loving a woman is to seek to make her happy before you yourself.

reply to post by junglejake


First of all I want to say that I appreciate you not taking offense at my nonsense above, I hope you know there was no intent to belittle behind it ... just observing a seemingly funny wording of the thread title.

Also for the record I am in religion, as on all other elements of our existence, agnostic ... that is simply to say 'I don't know.'

Without getting bogged down in academic theology, for which I contain almost no substantial knowledge ... could you please help me understand how different denominations of the christian faith seem to have different stances on the OP's topic.
It seems to the observer at a distance, that what you expressed above can't really be opened to interpretation. I assume (but don't know) that this is part of the 'reformation' ... yet as you describe it, it appears to be clear cut.

edit cause I forget to type words.

2nd edit to make the effort to look things up myself instead of depending on others.
I found this link which explains it a little better ... and also shows how much interpretation is a part of the process. www.liberty.edu...

[edit on 29 Jan 2010 by schrodingers dog]

[edit on 29 Jan 2010 by schrodingers dog]

reply to post by schrodingers dog


There's no offense taken! I was on the opposite side of this argument several years ago, and, quite frankly, loved to tweak Christians. I didn't think that was what you were trying to do, and even if it was, Jesus can defend Himself.

Which segues into this paragraph. Hooray! I do love my theology, and find it easy to delve in deeply into scripture to exemplify a point. I just find it absurdly interesting, and, quite frankly, learned much of it talking with folks about what I believe here on ATS. Many folks here made great points against Christianity I couldn't ignore, which kept me digging deeper into the religion. Ironically, it's made me a more gung-ho Christian than I think I ever could have been without those detractors.

So, anyway, I try to base my theology on the Bible being authoritative, meaning it is the inspired word of God, and, in its writing, God is the author, though He wrote it through man. Right now, free will discussion = academic theology, so I'll move on

I suspect my theology has been influenced by the reformation, since, well, I don't read Latin. I believe, from my reading of the Bible, that it's pretty clear cut that men aren't supposed to lust after women. This doesn't mean you can't be attracted to them -- we'd be wiped out as a people were that true. It's the lust, which is going beyond, "Hmm, she's really beautiful, I'd like to get to know her," to "Dang, she hot. I wanna bang her but never would. Or would I..."

My explanation to you in the previous post tied in verses from various parts of the Bible. I don't belong to any specific denomination, though I see the point of many (another discussion for another place ). I try to see the Bible as a whole, a single book, and as such, often will reference verses from many of the books of the Bible to make a point. I believe God was consistent in writing His Word, and so it all works together (which, by the way, blows my socks off!).

I've not been to a church (I've been to several denominations) where they've advocated masturbation, though I've heard of some who do. I think that's where the message gets confused -- typically when it is advocated, it is a way to help you blank your mind of the lust. Afterward, for a guy at least, it's a lot easier to stop thinking of a woman in a sexual manner.

So, in short, I know what Jesus said, and TinFoil quoted that above. I know God wrote we are to have self-control. I also know that God wrote that He can redeem us from anything if we just call out to Him genuinely. I know He wrote we are shown grace for our behavior against Him. So that's why I believe what I wrote to be clear cut.

I had a local religious leader once say that if you are tempted by internet pornography, a good way to avoid it is to put a picture of Jesus beside your computer. That way, you are reminded that there are certain temptations you don't want to give in to. I'd imagine it's pretty hard to wank off while Jesus is watching you...

You could also carry something with you as a sort of reminder to avoid sin. For instance, Catholics often have a cross on a necklace. I'm a Mormon, and many of us wear these rings that say 'CTR' on them (choose the right). I have also seen other Christians with rings and bracelets that say 'WWJD' on them. (what would jesus do) Perhaps something along those lines would help?

The other part of your question, as to whether onanism is wrong... there's a lot of debate about that, so I won't get into that. I will say, however, that when I read the Genesis account of Onan, it sounds to me like God was mad at Onan more because he wouldn't "raise seed unto his brother's wife". (his brother had died without children so in that culture the next brother was supposed to marry his wife and have kids in the deceased's name, and Onan didn't want to, so he "spilled his seed upon the ground")

(just checked, and that story is in genesis 38)