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(IWWC) A Sense of Self

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posted on Jul, 5 2009 @ 07:00 PM
Throughout his training as a soldier, there was one thing he had been taught, over and over again. This point had been stressed on the first day of his training, and repeatedly thereafter: Do not let yourself be captured by the Indigos.

This was because the Indigos tortured their prisoners without compassion.

And yet, here he found himself face-to-face with that prohibition. At the last moment, before the Indigos had overtaken his position, he had been unable to end his life. He had hesitated. And as a consequence – just as they had warned - he would be tortured.

The training videos had shown horrific documentary scenes, and had attempted to explain. The Indigos were different. Unlike normal humans, Indigos only had a sense of "self". They felt no empathy. They were unable to connect to the emotions of other people.

The Indigos were genetically different. This is what would permit an Indigo to ignore screams of pain, observe the pitiful begging for mercy without emotion. They could not connect. If you were unfortunate enough to be captured, the Indigos would torture you, until finally you gave up everything, including your soul.

His trainers drilled him. It would be much better, under any circumstances, to escape capture, retain your humanity and end your own life.

"Say it," his torturer spoke in a detached tone. "You want the pain to stop. We will give you morphine, and your pain will go away. Just say these final words."

Whether he lived or died now was immaterial. The only purpose of his life was to end his pain. They had broken his bones one by one, his toes, is fingers, his feet, his hands, his legs, and his arms, his hips, his face. They had shattered his body with medical precision. His agony was unbearable.

After a point, he had begun telling them everything. Troop locations, strategic plans. But they had continued relentlessly.

"Just say these final words, and the pain will stop."

Regaining some level of consciousness, he realized he might finally put an end to his situation. His training no longer mattered. He had no goals, no morality, and no sense of "self" whatsoever.

"I – I – renounce –"

"Yes! Finish the thought!"

"I – renounce – the war against you."

"Yes. And?"

"And – I am sorry."

His torturer nodded. An associate immediately injected him with painkillers. Almost instantly, his pain began to subside.

Someone put the muzzle of a handgun into his face. He could see the gun, and the slim hand holding it between his eyes.

"Good. Just agree to one more thing. And if you lie, we will know that, and you will die immediately. Say it now! If you can!"

Even in his agony, he momentarily resisted. At this point, he could say nothing more without believing it fully. He could not lie, and yet could not hold back. Death loomed. But the pain was beginning to subside now. Death did not seem as attractive as it had moments before.

He sighed. "Yes," he whimpered. "Yes. I will no longer eat meat."

"Excellent. You renounce war. And you are sorry for participating in it. And you will embrace vegetarianism. A good start. One of several that we would have accepted. It is all we needed to hear."

He received a second shot of morphine. The pain disappeared completely, and he began to unfold into blissful unconsciousness.

And as he faded to sleep, he looked at his torturer's face. And for the first time, she smiled. She was unbelievably angelic and beautiful. How could he not have seen that before? How beautiful all Indigos truly were!

"You are taught that we are without empathy," she said. "You are told that we believe only in our own selves. But that is not true. It is simply a fact that our empathy travels in a different direction than yours. Go, my soldier. Think about what you have actually surrendered, and why. In time, you will heal, and you will understand...."

[edit on 5-7-2009 by Axial Leader]

posted on Jul, 5 2009 @ 07:04 PM
reply to post by Axial Leader

I just finished watching the "The Deer Hunter" on TV, and immediately wrote this story down in one sitting.

"The Deer Hunter":

This story works on several different levels for me. I wonder if any Indigo would have patience to watch this movie. But perhaps they don't really need to sit through three straight movie-hours in order to understand its point. Perhaps they already get it.

[edit on 5-7-2009 by Axial Leader]

posted on Jul, 5 2009 @ 07:25 PM
reply to post by Axial Leader

Hey Axial , glad to see you back

I'll catch up with the tale in a minute but wanted to let you know that I stopped by.

posted on Jul, 5 2009 @ 10:50 PM
Awesome story! Cruel but compassionate if only you will see things as they see them.

I also liked that the word count for the story was 666. (I'm a mod, I have to check those things for the contest)

Great submission my friend, I hope the judges look kindly upon you.


posted on Jul, 6 2009 @ 10:22 AM
Very clever use of subtle ironies.

Strong imagery; I could see the scene in my minds eye. Visual...

posted on Jul, 6 2009 @ 04:47 PM

Originally posted by mrwupy
Cruel but compassionate if only you will see things as they see them.

It is a brutal story. You may think that I paint the Indigos as monsters, but my intent is actually quite the opposite.

I omit any details about the soldier or his army's methods, but the reader should ask: what kind of army is it that encourages its soldiers to commit suicide rather than be captured? What atrocities have Indigos had to endure, committed by this army? Maybe the Indigos, even with their over-the-top torture techniques, are not that bad in comparison.

The reader should look at the last paragraph. What did the soldier actually surrender? I submit that he surrendered his willingness to continue fighting against Indigos, and yes – his willingness to eat slaughtered animals. (Vegetarians will get this more than most, I think.) He surrendered his limited and short-term empathy for a larger and more abstract compassion.

And why did he surrender? Because he realized (by suffering hideous and protracted torture) that the "sense of self" is really, really very important.

It is my postulate that this is what makes an Indigo: a heightened sense of "self" – even beyond the already heightened sense we sentient beings are normally imbued with. We characterize Indigos as self-conscious and self-centered. Perhaps it would be more accurate to characterize Indigos as "acutely self-aware".

Given that our extraordinary self-awareness is what distinguishes us from lower animals, perhaps this enhanced self-awareness is the next step in human evolution.

The Indigos tortured this soldier not to kill him, but to heighten his sense of "self", and thereby convert him into one of their own. That is really the central point of this story, believe it or not.

posted on Jul, 8 2009 @ 01:10 AM
Your story brought chaos to a corrupt order in the end bringing peace. I await ThE indigo take oN it Too.
Solid storY Axial!!

posted on Jul, 8 2009 @ 09:52 PM
reply to post by Axial Leader

I actually felt pain at that level before. I revisited it in your story! I found myself urgently waiting to read that they gave him the painkillers. Thank you for the story. I really enjoyed it.

posted on Jul, 11 2009 @ 07:48 PM
very, very good !

i can see where you are coming from with the scene in The Deer Hunter ( an all time favourite).
enforced darknight of the soul with instant results through physical torture, mmm the indigoes are ruthless!
top stuff!

posted on Aug, 9 2009 @ 03:39 PM
It seemed incongruous that such cruelty to a prisoner could be dealt out on the final request of not eating meat and becoming vegetarian. On the other hand, he was spared death, which is the fate of the animals people eat.

The tension between captors and captive felt very high, mainly due to the differences between the Indigo mindset (no empathy) and the very real agony of the captive. Your story described that nicely.

Well done.

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