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Funny Stories. Add Some

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posted on Jun, 30 2009 @ 05:39 PM
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Once upon a time there was a young boy named Jimmy. Jimmy was 15 years old and lived in Detroit, Michigan. While walking home from school one day, a blue Dog jumped out from behind a Tree and tackled Jimmy to the ground. But just when he was about to let out a scream for help, Jimmy realized that the blue Dog was only licking his face, not trying to bite it off. At that moment, Jimmy decided to keep the blue Dog as a pet. And on the way home he decided to name his pet blue Dog "David."

When Jimmy and his new pet finally got home, guess who was standing on the front porch? That's right, it was Jimmy's mother, Martha. And boy was she surprised to see a blue Dog following Jimmy into the yard! "What in world is that?" shouted Martha. "It's a blue Dog," answered Jimmy. "Dah, I can see that, Jimmy, but what on earth is it doing here?" said Martha. "It's my new pet!" answered Jimmy. "Oh you think so do you?" remarked Martha. "I wouldn't get your hopes up. You know how your father hates blue Dogs. But, well, I suppose you can keep him until your father comes home." And with that Jimmy grabbed David by the scruff of the neck and led his new pet into the house -- even though he knew his father was probably going to dissaprove.

Once in the house, Jimmy and David played and played, that is until Jimmy's favorite television show, "Scrubs," started. At that point Jimmy forgot all about David having an unsupervised run of the house. That is until half way through "Scrubs," when Jimmy was brought back to reality when he heard his father shout, "Hate!! Jimmy! Get your butt in the Kitchen...NOW!!" With that Jimmy rushed into the Kitchen to see what all the fuss was about.

When he entered the Kitchen, there stood his father, Joshua, pointing toward the Couch. "Will someone please explain that?" asked his father. Then, as Jimmy followed his father's finger to where it was pointing, he instantly knew what his father was so upset about. There, smack dab in the middle of the Couch, was the biggest pile of Dog doo-doo he had ever seen! "I don't EVEN want to know how that got there," said Joshua. "But you had better get it cleaned up now! And you had better get rid of whatever it is that could have done such a thing!"

Well, knowing his father as well as he did, Jimmy knew there was no sense even asking his father if he could keep David for a pet. So without hesitation, Jimmy set out to find where David was hiding.

After a few minutes of looking, Jimmy discovered David crouched beneath the table that Jimmy did his Reading on. "Come on, David, it's time to find you a new home. And hey, don't look at me that way, I'm not the one who did the dirty deed on the Couch!" scolded Jimmy. "Thanks to you I'll never get to have my own pet Dog!! And with that Jimmy led David out of the house and down to the local 7/11. 7/11 had a pet section and Jimmy knew the owner would find David a good home. So after saying good-bye to David, and thanking the owner of 7/11, Jimmy walked backed home and attempted to dround his sorrows by slamming down a half dozen Faygos. But Jimmy's pitty party came to an abrupt end when his father reminded him about the mess he had neglected to clean up. And low and behold, midway through the clean-up, Jimmy suddenly became thankful that someone else was going to have to do it from now on.

The End.

[edit on 30-6-2009 by ShadowLife]




posted on Jun, 30 2009 @ 05:46 PM
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Another one. Shorter though.

Gore em' Store em' General hospital is one of America's awesomeest hospitals for black , rich and famous People. The medical students are composed of 7 males and 8 Dogs.The Dogs do the best repairs. The Doctor's specialize in Cat surgeries which features such specialties as Bears and Flowers for these surgeries,with all the pepsi medicine they need for only $1.29. The Cheif of Staff of the Hospital Mr.T, is raising money to build a new Can laboratory and a new research lunch. Any pateint who goes to this hospital can consider himself very good.



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