Removing the Bully in Me and You., page 1

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ATS Members have flagged this thread 3 times

Topic started on 12-4-2009 @ 03:41 AM by Dark Ghost

I feel confident to say that most people in this world have experienced Bullying in one form or another. Whether you were the perpetrator, victim, bystander or moderator - I'm sure you have seen this very ugly practice. I have come across a range of definitions, but feel it can be best reduced to the following:

Bullying is using power over a person or people in a harmful way. Bullying goes against our rights, has negative effects on our safety, and can affect our chances to develop our full potential.

(Novita)

Education is the key to stopping this practice, and the best time to begin this education is as soon as possible. Yes, young children will not understand the significance of Bullying until they are mentally mature enough, but it is best to teach them what it is, how it works and why it must not be done. Also, I think it's important that anti-Bullying education should be practised every year of schooling, or as often as possible for each school and workplace.

Why did I make a thread about Bullying? Well for a few reasons, but mainly I think so many problems in the world could be avoided if Bullying was prevented, acknowledged and stopped when it does occur. Unfortunately, I myself have been the perpetrator of Bullying in the past. Although I was rather young when it happened, it's still apart of my history that I regret. I feel one of the ways I can redeem this dark part of my history is to advocate anti-Bullying ideals that will weaken this malicious psychological tool. This can be done by outlining the very issues that Bullying can create.

- Bullying is a VERY serious and COMMON problem throughout the world.

- Bullying must be acknowledged, addressed and prevented in the future through education.

- Bullying can lead to low self-esteem, low self-worth, anxiety and depression.

- Bullying causes victims to become isolated, withdrawn and unhappy.

- Bullying can have long-term consequences on the victim's personality, attributes and and confidence.

- Bullying is one of the highest causes of suicide, especially among teenagers and young adults.

- Bullying can lead victims to lose their mental stability and carry out atrocities such as school/university shootings.

- Bullying gives the perpetrator a false sense of security and control over others.

- Those who witness Bullying may be influenced to imitate this behaviour sooner or later in life.

I could spend paragraphs upon paragraphs getting into all the details, but I would rather summarise my views and provide external links on the issues of Bullying. The following websites provide solid information on effective strategies for dealing with Bullying.

www.bullying.org...

www.education.unisa.edu.au...

www.bullyingnoway.com.au...

en.wikipedia.org...

My contention for this topic was to inform the general public about Bullying and its effects. I do not contend that people who commit atrocities such as school shootings/bombs should be excused for their actions, but hopefully better controlling of Bullying will greatly reduce the number of troubled individuals who decide to take this option. Also, I hope this article will lead more people to reflect on their lives and how they treat others around them.

If you are EVER in a situation where you think Bullying might have or be occurring, speak INDIVIDUALLY with those who you think are affected. You would be surprised how much more open and honest people are when you are one-on-one with them.

PS: If this thread strikes a chord with you, please Star & Flag it so more people will see it and hopefully spread the word.

[edit on 12/4/2009 by Dark Ghost]

reply posted on 12-4-2009 @ 04:21 AM by spellbound

reply to post by Dark Ghost

Do you know what worries me more than the fact of bullying?

Why are we all born with the bullying gene? Or some of us - the rest would be as well if they were strong enough.

It seems to me as if we are born into this world ready to hate, bully and kill our fellowman. What loving creator would have done that?

This leads me seriously to question the concept of a loving God/creator.

And yes, bullying is rife and worse now with cell phones and the internet. A lot of young people have committed suicide because of bullying.

It is disgraceful and totally unacceptable, and I hope that bullies whose victims have killed themselves suffer for all their time on this earth and wherever else we go.

reply posted on 12-4-2009 @ 04:24 AM by YouAreDreaming

I don't want to be a bully, I genuinely want to care and love humanity. Just kind of hard, mind you I am now 36 and not in highschool, so the chances of me bullying anyone is most improbable.

That said, I believe one act of kindness has more reward then 1000 acts of violence.

reply posted on 12-4-2009 @ 04:30 AM by RuneSpider

reply to post by spellbound

Was bullied on as a kid, now a days have to be careful not to be a bully, due to my size and my temper.
I've known a lot of good people, many who have some serious legs up on their competition, nice folks.
My karate instructors could lay me flat and several other people, but ar there to help any of their students, same to various degrees with many of the people I've met there, at work, and around the place.

As for stopping bullying... it's dang near impossible.
Some bullying is point of view, friendly ribbing to one group is bullying to another.
Some people walk through life setting themselves up to be bullied. Think of some of the trolls who come on the forum on occasion.

Other times, you get people who got picked on by jackmule A, and because A was a jack to them, they end up being a Jack to person B.
Might have just been a off hand remark, but it spreads to a C.

Then you just have some guy or gal who thinks they are the bees knees for whatever reason.
Won't change their minds no matter what you do about them or to them. best you can do if they aren't actually hurting yourself is treating them like trolls here: ignoring them.

reply posted on 17-4-2009 @ 02:57 PM by amazed

S & F

I would like to suggest some reading for parents who's children may be dealing with bullies. Both books are by Rosalind Wiseman, one is called "Queen Bees & Wannabees", and the other is called "Queen Bee Mom's & Kingpin Dad's".

They are great books to get parents started. The first one talks about how to support children who are being bullied, and how to teach them techniques to deal with bullies in a healthy way. The other is to assist adults who may be dealing with adult bullies. The second one is very important, as many times if you are dealing with child bullies, and you have to speak with the child's parents, you may be dealing with adult bullies.

Both books have great ideas and suggestions on how to deal with bullies, be they adults or children. The biggest problem I see with the books is that they are mainly dealing with bullies from the perspective of girls, but most of the techniques can be transferred over when dealing with boys.

Peace

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