posted on May, 31 2008 @ 02:02 AM
Dang it! Are you kidding me? I just hit a huge bump in the road and my coffee spilled all over my new suit. Ahhhhh... how that burns! Oh great. The
coffee is all over my car seat as well. Just great. I've had the car for 2 days, and already I've left an indelible impression. MAN! I do have to
say that this car swerves really well and stuff! Yeah! Now that's some really cool swervin' and stuff.
Lights in my rearview. Oh come on. Are you kidding me?
So I pull over.
"License and Registration Sir."
I can only imagine what this officer is thinking. I'm covered in hot coffee. I have a napkin between my legs, and my face is all red and stuff due to
the burning sensation boiling water leaves when it spills on you.
"Are you OK Sir?"
"Yes Sir. Just spilled my coffee."
"Is that why you were all over the road?"
"Had alot to do with it."
He was very cool. Just doin' his job and stuff.
"Sir, you should probably take your shirt, tie, and suit to a dry cleaner. You look a mess."
"Thanks Officer, I really needed that."
"Have a good day sir. Oh by the way. Maybe you should wait until you are at a full stop before you take another sip of your coffee."
So I pull into work. I'm no sooner in the door when I hear my boss say:
"Lombozo! I need Junes projections now!"
"You told me you needed them Monday."
"Things change. I need them now! What the hell happened to your suit?"
"I'm on it. I did them last night, just let me download and print them out. I had a competition with a pothole, and the coffee and pothole won."
"You should probably get to a dry cleaner right away."
"Yep. Thanks for the advice."
The whole time I'm thinkin' how much I wish I could just go back home........
Then over the loudspeaker I hear:
"Lombozo call extension 8765."
I plug my laptop into the network so I can download my forecasts.
'Trying to find network......."
Great just freakin' great.
So I dial 8765. "Hey Larry."
"Well? Just say it."
"The prototypes won't be finished today."
Great. I have an 11:00 appt. in Manhattan with a new customer to deliver the newly designed prototype.
"well the this and that broke down, and the ......"
"Larry. Just tell me when it will be done."
Please Lord, let me wake up.
"Hey lombozo. What happened to your suit?" She asked. Sheila - the office hottie.
"Coffee. Car. Pothole."
"Well maybe we can go to my place for lunch, and I'll wash your clothes for you." and she winks.
"Thanks Sheila, but I think it will be better to use a dry cleaner."
"I don't wash clothes. I think you know what I meant."
Oh man. Don't say it, don't say it, don't do it.
"You're the best Sheila."
"Anytime sweetie. Anytime."
My phone is ringing.
"This is lombozo."
Satan - I mean my lovely wife is on the line.
"OK. I need this, and that, and a couple other things. I'm writing a check for X number of dollars. And I need my hair colored."
"You just had your hair colored last week."
"You're such an a-hole. Vicky just had hers done, and it's the latest color."
She hangs up in my ear.
"I need those projections pronto!"
"Workin' on it."
So I finally get everything printed out. I smooth everything over with the client waiting for the prototype.
Uh-Oh! I have 2 minutes until a new business conference call! Yikes.
I dial up in a jiffy. Can't be late!
Waiting. Waiting........ Finally the other party comes on.
Can't say it was a wasted 30 minutes, but when you're dealing with those that cannot see outside the box you may as well be speaking to a blade of
'Hmmm...... Gotta figure out a new game plan on this one.'
So it's finally time to head home. Traffic is awful. Awful! After an hour and 15 minutes I pull into my driveway. I'm ready to explode.
My son is at the front door, wearing his bathing suit. He has his swimming bubble, and a pair of swim goggles on. He looks so goofy that he looks
awesome. In a moment, I suddenly feel better.
"Daddy come on! Let's go in the pool!"
"Allright little Dude!"
I walk in the front door and he jumps up into my arms. He gives me my great big super squeezy hug.
"I love you Daddy!"
"I love you to Dude."
"C'mon. Let's go into the pool."
"Let me change buddy."
"No now! I've been waiting for you!"
Ah. My suit is ruined anyway.
We run out back, he goes in, and I jump in - suit and all.
"Do it again Daddy."
So I get out and do a 'super tsunami' which is a modified cannonball making a huge splash. His laugh and smile are better than any tranquilizer ever
I can only imagine what we looked like. Him in his goofy get up, and me swimming in a suit....
"I love you Daddy."
Man! What a great day.
As I always say: 'Don't sweat the small stuff.'
Life is good.