posted on May, 9 2008 @ 03:40 PM
Another one from about 6 years ago, i worked the window occassionally at an animal sanctuary.
We had a cougar, birds, and lemurs right at the entrance. Also at the entrance was a sign, painted on a 4x8 sheet of plywood:
Under 5 Free
The average "goldfish" would come up, look a the animals, watch the birds squak, the cats pace, the lemurs jump around, look at the sign, look
around, turn to me and ask:
"Do you have animals here?"
The next question was oftentimes:
"Are they alive?"
Depending on how frustrated i was by that point, i'd sometimes tell them:
"No, all of our animals are advanced animatronic robots."
Some would wonder in the amazement of the animatronics.
The next question is usually, after staring at the sign with the prices and apparently studying it intently for a reasonable enough timeframe to
comprehend all of the information contained in it's intricate complexity of 3 lines.
And it would be either:
"Does it cost money?"
"How much does it cost?"
I'd kindly refer them to the sign that has the prices listed.
They'd ponder the sign for a second, and finallly turn to me:
"So it costs $8.00?"
And at that i'd confirm that they are in fact literate and capable of reading, leading to the conclusion that the problem lies therein with the fact
that they just don't comprehend, or forget what they read 3 seconds later.
It would usually take a few more rounds of circular nonsense like this before they can gain admission, due to similar lines of ridiculous
"Do i have to pay if i just want to look at the animals?"
(My thought, What the hell were you planning to do to/with the animals if not look at them?)
"If i pay, do i get to see the animals?"
(my thought, Are you aware of anything around you?)
Usually the people who ask these questions also have quite a difficult time counting 8 dollars. And there's a LOT of them. I'd get those
questions repeatedly all day.
Another one i'd get all the time, i had a sandwich shop and these same types would attempt to feed.
During a rush, i'd be taking orders and making sandwiches and doing business with the regular crowd. Someone i see stand in line, watch me make and
sell a few sandwiches, will step to the counter and ask:
"Are you open?"
"Do you have food here?"
There's a list of sandwiches on the wall with prices, they see that and ask:
"Is this your menu?"
(No, i just put that big sign there to show you what we don't have)
And there's a lot of them out there. Fortunately i live in a pretty down to earth place with a low idiot quotient, so it's mostly with the
outlanders that come here and swim into the glass repeatedly.