Bullying: Our favorite pasttime

It seems that bullying has become the favorite pasttime of many these days. The end result being that someone snaps and commits suicide or goes on a shooting spree.

Bullying is no longer the staple of playgrounds and school yards. It occurs in the workplace, the roadways, the pulpit. I can't understand why some people feel the need to drive another person or group into the ground. What good can possibly come of it?

What can we do as a whole to curb this disturbing trend?

Been there, done that, HATED IT. I'm glad that there are currently efforts to try to address this problem. It's gotten WAY out of hand.

My heart really goes out to kids who are affected by it. When you're young you don't really know what to do sometimes and telling an adult about it isn't always wise or an option at all.

Peace.

Unfortuantly, as a 15 year old High School Freshman in this day and age, i cannot tell you how society today has pissed me off. Gangbangers, wanna-bes, emos, etc. have all been pissing me off. Todays generation is too focused on being self-centerd. I know i am , but it is especially bad today!! Not enough effort is being put forth to stop bullying. My opinion is that bullying and hatred towards people who are alienated or loners, will just make them snap. My heart goes out to the Columbine and Virginia Tech shooters. I AM NOT SAYING WHAT THEY DID IS RIGHT, its just that society kinda just made them be isolated. From the bullying and rude comments towards them it was hard for them to live normal lives. the Virginia Tech shooter already had a history of mental illness to an extent, wheter it was shallow or not, there was a reason he was isolated.Columbine on the other hand, they were teased and bullied by their peers where they too were alienated for the thoughts and beliefs. i am not saying that they should've shot many innocents, but does it really take a fricking school shooting with dozens left dead and many more wounded, making it headline news just for the rest of America to take a more stricter notice of bullying and safety? SERIOUSL, it has to take 32 innocents dead for this very issue to be recognized by everyone else, and the media just blows the whole thing out of proportion leading America to have anger take over their mind.

Listen, i know am young and think i know everything. But i am an open-minded person, so tell me your comments and such. Just be mature!! I am sorry if i insulted anyone and/or made you mad by my opinions. I am young, and i make mistakes. Thanks for even reading this.

Originally posted by jarheadjock
~ Listen, i know am young and think i know everything. But i am an open-minded person, so tell me your comments and such. Just be mature!! I am sorry if i insulted anyone and/or made you mad by my opinions. I am young, and i make mistakes. Thanks for even reading this. ~

I understand your frustration. I was bullied for eleven of the twelve years I was in public school because I was an egghead. I was physically attacked and engaged in constant psychological warfare. It was exhausting and I am not an entirely happy adult because of it.

From my perspective, school officials and teachers could care less. Their interest is that paycheck every couple of weeks. Very few were willing to get involved in my struggles. I was fortunate that there were two teachers who put a stop to the crap when they could.

Anyway, it shouldn't take school shootings to stop the BS, but that seems to be the trend. I believe, again, that teachers and others employed in schools across the country don't give a smack about bullying except in how it affects their ability to make it to the last bell.

I'm sure they'll hop in this thread now and flame the crap out of me, but I speak from eleven years of personal experience. School is a little-examined crucible that breeds fear and heartache and the people who should give a sheet don't unless the punch or the barb or the gun is aimed right at them.

My $.02.

Originally posted by RRex13I'm sure they'll hop in this thread now and flame the crap out of me, but I speak from eleven years of personal experience. School is a little-examined crucible that breeds fear and heartache and the people who should give a sheet don't unless the punch or the barb or the gun is aimed right at them.

They wont because its the truth. And your right, the teachers and school admins dont really care. The time when action will take place is when its too late and out of control. It already is, but the system is deteriorating faster than ever crumbling at the "difficulty of this situtaion" or make some more BS school board excuses. They just want the damn school kids to get good grades so they can be accredited and stuff. But i understand where your coming from and i commend you for living through that hell, and say your one of the few adults who actually give a damn about this. and thanks for reading my post.

This is the very reason for my becoming a Police Officer...

My Big Sister was not popular and was picked on all through school. I was two years behind her and took up for her all I could, but the damage was done and I can see the results even now.

I hate bullies, on here and in real life, they are a caustic sore on society. Regardless of the recent "Pig" threads being authored by the juvenile misinformed, it is my experience being in this business all my life, that most Officer's feel the same way I do.

Just my 2 cents..

Semper

This probably won't be a popular answer, but bullying is not a new thing. I was in elementary school over 30 years ago, and I was the class omega. It was so bad that on one class trip, even the teacher got in on the act and helped humiliate me on the bus o' doom. I was emotionally fragile because of child abuse at home, and was smarter than most of the other kids in class, which was not a happy combination. It attracted bullies like blood in the water attracts sharks.

However, I never tried to murder any classmates or commit suicide. It was just the sad fact of my life. In the end it made me stronger. It was unpleasant, and should not have happened, but it always HAS happened. If you look at evolutionary biology and modern primates, that is the way we are. We are social apes and social apes have their hierarchy. And the apes on the bottom of the hierarchy take everyone else's crap.

No matter WHAT is done to someone, the choice to go out and kill was entirely upon the person who did the heinous deed. Nobody made him. He had a choice, to rise above it and become a stronger and better person despite these impediments, or do something stupid and unnecessary. The onus is entirely on the murderer, IMO.

There is no excuse for bullying, no. But being bullied is no excuse for becoming a murderer. Nobody made him pick up the gun, he chose to. Therefore it's all on him.

Bullying in school needs to be addressed. Just because we're primates doesn't mean we can't overcome our biological imperatives; that's why we have our great big brains. But blaming society for what one individual did is a cop out, just like a child abuser complaining to the court that he was abused as a child so he "just couldn't help it."

I'm tired of people passing the buck when they do something wrong. It's reminiscent of the old excuse, "The Devil made me do it." The Devil today being our corrupt society. It's all hooey. Nobody can force anyone else to do anything, there is always a choice.

You know what Major?

That brings up the also probably unpopular hypothesis that being bullied would in fact make the person stronger and in the end better suited to succeed..

Having been bullied, do you feel this may be the case?

Semper

Well, I can't say I've ever been successful, but it made me well-equipped to doggedly hang on when there seems to be no hope in my life. I've been through some seriously heavy events, from being homeless in San Francisco to the custody battle from hell I'm involved in now. I'm not rich or powerful, no, but I am well prepared for adversity. And I rarely ever care what most people think of me.

Success? Not necessarily. Survival, doggedness and determination, most assuredly. Unless of course you equate success with survival, which on the genetic level is all that matters. Despite what I've been through, I still managed to pass along my DNA and my kids will benefit from the extent of my own experience. I think that social behaviors can be passed down to your children just like your DNA can. Having a parent that has survived so much can only benefit them in the end, by example if by nothing else.

[edit for typo - not enough coffee yet]


[edit on 28-4-2007 by MajorMalfunction]

Originally posted by MajorMalfunction
No matter WHAT is done to someone, the choice to go out and kill was entirely upon the person who did the heinous deed. Nobody made him. He had a choice, to rise above it and become a stronger and better person despite these impediments, or do something stupid and unnecessary. The onus is entirely on the murderer, IMO.

There is no excuse for bullying, no. But being bullied is no excuse for becoming a murderer. Nobody made him pick up the gun, he chose to. Therefore it's all on him.

I couldn't agree more with this sentiment. People need to be held accountable for their actions, regardless of their individual circumstances.

I was also the victim of schoolyard bullies. Despite the mental anguish, I learned to cope. I can honestly say that while my life if far from perfect, I'm content with my familly and my job. I am more empathetic towards others, and I strive to treat people with dignity.

What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. There's a corallary to that rule. But only if you're strong enough psychologically.

Ex-victim of bullying here. I can remember being so angry, that I nearly did snap on a couple of occaisions, not to the point of shooting up the school, but certainly attacking physically my tormentors. This subject is near to my heart because of my experiances. I have no time for bullies of any sort, I've lost freinds because I won't tolerate it in any fashion.

first of all,my heart,as a victim of bullying myself,lgoes out to those who have HAD A PART OF THEIR LIVES STOLEN FROM THEM by bullies. however,i think it is bull# when someone simply says "he's the one that chose to do it,so it is his fault." when we say that,we're simply excusing the little puke who has been doing the bullying. the question is: WHY did he pick up the gun and do what he did? i know this because,as a child,i was literally bullied from the moment that i walked into kindergarten. i had my childhood stolen away from me, as i was alone almost always,and teased,etc.,everywhere i went. and yes,on a couple of occassions, i did get violent and hurt those who were teasing me because there was simply no way to get them to stop. children should be allowed to have fun,friends, and be allowed to be children. bullying is never excusable under any circumstances,and,as it did to me,DOES drive people to violence. this needs to be stopped NOW,and those who do it ,as well as those who allow it should be punished severly.

o.p. by Major Malfunction
If you look at evolutionary biology and modern primates, that is the way we are. We are social apes and social apes have their hierarchy. And the apes on the bottom of the hierarchy take everyone else's crap.

That's right. We struggle to function in a hierarchical society that is a product of a fallen world. I have bullied, and been bullied, in turn.

Are we really no better than chickens in a coup, establishing a pecking order and looking for the first opportunity to step on and over the one 'above' us, while constantly keeping those 'below' us in line?

Now, I am going to get Biblical on y'all. If you don't want to hear it, stop here and go back to the coup. Or skip over it and go on below. Or do whatever you please. No more bullying for or from me.

1 Corinthians 12:

14 For the body is not one member, but many.

15 If the foot shall say, Because I am not the hand, I am not of the body; is it therefore not of the body?

16 And if the ear shall say, Because I am not the eye, I am not of the body; is it therefore not of the body?

17 If the whole body were an eye, where were the hearing? If the whole were hearing, where were the smelling?

18 But now hath God set the members every one of them in the body, as it hath pleased him.

19 And if they were all one member, where were the body?

20 But now are they many members, yet but one body.

21 And the eye cannot say unto the hand, I have no need of thee: nor again the head to the feet, I have no need of you.

22 Nay, much more those members of the body, which seem to be more feeble, are necessary:

23 And those members of the body, which we think to be less honourable, upon these we bestow more abundant honour; and our uncomely parts have more abundant comeliness.

24 For our comely parts have no need: but God hath tempered the body together, having given more abundant honour to that part which lacked:

25 That there should be no schism in the body; but that the members should have the same care one for another.

26 And whether one member suffer, all the members suffer with it; or one member be honoured, all the members rejoice with it.

27 Now ye are the body of Christ, and members in particular.

Just covered it this morning in Bible study. I think these passages sum it up nicely.

Like it or not, believe it or not, we are all interdependent. The pecking order of Social Darwinism is a perversion of the 'survival of the fittest' lie, foisted on us by those that would have us remain isolated. Divide and conquer is the truth behind the lie of 'survival of the fittest'.

We are interdependent, and until we learn again to function as so, the bullying will continue. I say again, because I believe, prior to the ascendency of urbanization and specialization, we recognized our interdependency and functioned within it.

In American society, I think the turning point was the choice of our leaders to go with Hamiltonian Federalism over Jeffersonian Agrarianism. Centralization and compartmentalization have contributed greatly to the feelings of isolation and disconnection that drive the bullying culture. So many people have bought into the need to 'keep up with the Joneses', to feel superior to others.

It isn't working, is it? That's because it is dysfunctional. That's because it is contrary to God's plan for all of us to live in harmony to the betterment of ourselves and each other. We are all part of one great whole (not hole): humanity.

OUTSTANDING post IR,

The biblical references are right on in my opinion as well...

Whether one is Christian or not, how wonderful a world would it be if we all lived according to those principles?

Semper

jarheadjock:

I'm happy to listen to your concerns if it helps you cope with the crap. I had no one to talk to about it. My parents worked and we kids were five years apart. I was alone.

I don't have time to write more as I have an appointment this afternoon, but know that you are heard and understood here. You have my ear within appropriate boundaries. I make this last statement due to your age.

RRex13

how wonderful a world would it be if we all lived according to those principles?

Thanks, Semper.

I know it sounds utopian. I also know that the remnant the Good Lord sets aside will desire only to live this way.

Until then, we are blessed to have good people like you working to keep the bullies at bay.

Originally posted by RRex13
jarheadjock:

I'm happy to listen to your concerns if it helps you cope with the crap. I had no one to talk to about it. My parents worked and we kids were five years apart. I was alone.

I don't have time to write more as I have an appointment this afternoon, but know that you are heard and understood here. You have my ear within appropriate boundaries. I make this last statement due to your age.

RRex13

I thank you for that, and its only better that people are posting about this. I feel as if i have a second family here. My first family is great but limited to the size of 5. My second family here is anybody that will listen and its that feeling that makes me happy. Thanks.

Bullying is prevalent in western society. Let me give my opinion on why it is so bad in the US. The US is based on a highly competitive culture, which is why these instances break out (imo). I believe it directly results from the corporate and obsessive materialistic side of the West. The US ecapsulates this. Why are there so many US atheletes on steroids for example? I'm just thinking aloud, feel free to refute.

Originally posted by XerosI'm just thinking aloud, feel free to refute.

I wont refute, that is an excellent point. It creates more of an imperitive for our young to live in a harsher social heirarchy based on the "dog eat dog ritual".

I read an awful lot of Eastern literature, and it's not just Westerners that are bullies. It's PEOPLE.