Vote for republicans!

They forgot the main reasons to vote Republican.

As several of the far-far-far-right posters in various Fark political threads lately have said:

1. If you feel that the US Constitution is outdated and "quaint", vote Republican.

2. If you feel that Liberals and others who value the freedoms fought for by 10 generations of Americans are the greatest threat to America, vote Republican.

3. If you relish the thought of getting to torture people, and if you feel that perhaps we aren't torturing *enough* people, vote Republican.

4. If you think that every single one of the ONE BILLION muslims on Earth is busy sitting at home wondering about how to destroy America, vote Republican.

5. If you think that big government is bad, and that people should be left alone to live their lives in peace.... and your prefered method of achieving these goals is to double the size of the federal government and install listening devices on every corner and have random strip searches of the general population, vote Republican.

6. If you make over five million dollars a year, and really don't care if the entire nation collapses because you can always run off to the Caymans, the Bahamas, or Switzerland with your loot, vote Republican.

7. If you believe that Bush is the leader prophesized in the bible, who will unite the world and bring about The End Times, and The Rapture... and you didn't bother reading the part about how that prophesized leader is also the Anti-Christ... vote Republican.

8. If you think that torture, rape, murder, secret prisons, and the covering-up of torture, rape, murder, and secret prisons are ok... as long as the people being abused are "suspected" of something... then vote Republican.

9. If you feel that "supporting the troops" requires you to keep sending *more* troops into a meatgrinder of a complete fark-up of epic proportions that has already killed or wounded 50,000 American soldiers in order to "achieve" the installation of a Shiite theocratic regime that runs deathsquads in place in Iraq, vote Republican.

So, as you can see, there are MANY reasons to vote Republican.

If you have no brain, no heart, and no soul, vote Republican.

Seen on fark.com!

[edit on 27-10-2006 by Vitchilo]

Or, otoh, don't bother, because as has already been amply demonstrated, they don't need your vote to win.

One more rigged election... coming right up!

posted by Vitchilo

“ . . the main reasons to vote Republican.
1. You feel that the US Constitution is outdated . .
2. You feel Liberals are the greatest threat to America . .
3. You relish the thought of torturing people . .
4. You think every single Muslim on Earth is busy sitting at home how to destroy America
5. You think big government is bad . .
6. You make over five million dollars a year . .
7. You believe Bush43 is the leader prophesied in the bible . .
8. You think that torture, rape, murder, secret prisons, and the covering-up are ok . .
9. You feel "supporting the troops" requires you to keep sending *more* troops into a meatgrinder . .

So, as you can see, there are MANY reasons to vote Republican. If you have no brain, no heart, and no soul, vote Republican. Seen on fark.com! [Edited by Don W]

Pure Genius, Mr. Vitchilo. Thanks for the concise and cogent summary!

OMG,,,
I came to this topic ready and willing to get banned (I won't say what I was going to say )

Great topic!

posted by Beer_Guy

I came to this topic ready and willing to get banned . . Great topic! [Edited by Don W]

As of Saturday, Oct. 28, 2006, 2,812 members of the U.S. military have died since the United States launched an unprovoked attack on Iraq March 18, 2003 . . The British have reported 120 deaths; Italy, 33; Ukraine, 18; Poland, 17; Bulgaria, 13; Spain, 11; Denmark, six; El Salvador, five; Slovakia, three; Estonia, Netherlands, Thailand, two each; and Australia, Hungary, Kazakhstan, Latvia, Romania, one death each . . Bush43 says, “Stay the Course!”

The latest America death reported by the military: A Marine was killed Friday in Anbar province. We don’t even count the number of Iraqis killed in this debacle that looks more like a quagmire. Or a fiasco. Say thank you Gang of Four. That is 2.133 men per day, each and eery day, since the much ballyhooed Decapitation Strike was launched on orders of our own Great Leader and Commander-in-Chief for Life Bush43. Him of ANG AWOL fame. VP Cheney him of 5 Vietnam Deferments fame and $70 million Halliburton anticipation "bonus." The Oberfuhrer, Herr Rumsfeld who once sold Anthrax to Saddam Hussein. And the world's highest paid coffee-getter, Sec State Condo Rice. Her of caught lying fame when she denied CIA Tenant told her of an “imminent attack by al Qaeda” in July, 2001, but he produced proof. What a team!