A heartbreaking e-mail I just got - Did a GI leave a girl high and dry?

I'm an ex-Army guy. 6 years, the last nine-months in Iraq. Now, even though I am a civilian, I work for the Department of Defense, on a Naval base. Where I live is pretty remote, so I buy lots of stuff on line. I got this message from an E-bay seller. She's Korean, I was buying a Korean product, and she knew I was military from my FPO address. Here is her e-mail:

do you know anyone who staying in Korea? my finance is us army but currently he is in Iraq. I couldn't talk to him so long. so much worry about it. and I don't know anybody in US mil. if you know anyone would you give me any information?

I know for a fact that e-mail is readily available in Iraq. Either this guy died, and his family didn't know about his future wife to tell her. Or, and this is my theory, some jerk off GI promised to marry her to get some, and then used an "I'm leaving for Iraq" excuse to get out of it. He could be stationed in the states right now, maybe with his wife and kids, leaving some poor girl he used left to wonder whether he is alive or dead.

I was stationed in Korea for over two years, I have seen soldiers promise the world, just to get some sex, and then be the cruelest creatures you have ever seen.

I e-mailed her back, saying give me his name, unit, etc., I'd try to find some info. Being a fluent English speaker, I can traverse Google a lot more easier than she. I also told her, tactfully, that e-mail and letter writing is very easy in Iraq.

Maybe this guy is dead, but if she was his fiance, wouldn't she have contact with his family? I suspect the worse. That this guy just used this poor girl for sex, and made up an excuse to leave. Either way, it's on my doorstep now.

Kinda sad.

Not sure which is better, if he's dead or just ditched her. Ditched her I guess, but that's not right.

Man, if he's really ditching her thats very upsetting. How could someone be so cold Really sad though, I really feel bad for that lady.

as posted by curme
I know for a fact that e-mail is readily available in Iraq. Either this guy died, and his family didn't know about his future wife to tell her. Or, and this is my theory, some jerk off GI promised to marry her to get some, and then used an "I'm leaving for Iraq" excuse to get out of it. He could be stationed in the states right now, maybe with his wife and kids, leaving some poor girl he used left to wonder whether he is alive or dead.

.......
Maybe this guy is dead, but if she was his fiance, wouldn't she have contact with his family? I suspect the worse. That this guy just used this poor girl for sex, and made up an excuse to leave. Either way, it's on my doorstep now.

Your making a crapload of assumptions here, and all based subjectively and tainted by your own experiences. And because of such, you are unfairly marking and throwing this guy and this situation into those experiences. Really objective, huh?

First off, curme, are your assuming that this guy has immediate family?
Maybe his parents are dead or have died and he has no brothers or sisters to let her know what is going on. And being she is in Korea, the parents, if they have not passed away, may not know how to get in touch with her, may have never met her, and/or feel that they do not have any obligation to let her know, among a host of other unmentioned circumstances. After all, it is their son's responsibility, not theirs, and not yours in getting involved in this matter.

Secondly, as for your suspicions, you stepping into the realm of assumptions again? You accurately "suspect" such because what? Your past experiences?
That because some soldiers that do get stationed overseas, such as Korea or Japan or Germany or the Philippines, etc. do such things, therefore, you can safely and with 100% certainty "suspect" that this is another case of such?
Did not your DI/TI, family, etc. instruct you or advize you that assumptions are dangerous things to make, especially since you, the one doing the assuming, do not have privy to all the facts but whats given from one side? How do you know that she is trustworthy and telling you the whole deal here?

Either way, your making something your business that really should remain not your business. Reminds me of how people get broken noses and what not. Sorry for being blunt here, curme, but before condemning, those who do the condemning should know all the facts before passing, making, or insinuating such judgmental verdicts.






seekerof

[edit on 28-8-2005 by Seekerof]