posted on Dec, 4 2018 @ 05:08 PM
Interview with Jesus Christ
I haven’t slept for 50 hours and this is the conversation I am having. Consider it an interview with our savior, Jesus Christ. King of kings, Holy
of holies, etc.
Tim: I heard you are a werewolf
Tim: look at the baby jesus eating the innards of the gentiles!
Jesus Christ: Um, um, um…a werewolf? No, no, no…
Tim: #ing liar
Tim: all werewolves are liars
Jesus Christ: No, really…I swear to god!!!
Jesus Christ: I howl to god!
Tim: of course you do - you #ing lying ass werewolf
Tim: so how many people did you eat last night?
Jesus Christ: haha!!! It’s like I’m being persecuted all over again…! I
ate your mama!
Jesus Christ: hahaha!!
Tim: my mama?
Jesus Christ: Yo mama! Yep, that’s right! Watcha got to say about that?!?
Tim: you wanna come over and eat some garlic with me?
Tim: is it true that werewolves are responsible for emo music?
Tim: dirty evil werewolves
Jesus Christ: Garlic is nice! But don’t be blaming me for emo music. But I
do like that old band Rites of Spring…
Tim: I bet, you #ing filthy ass werewolf
Tim: you got dingles under your tail dont you?
Jesus Christ: Rites of Spring is good emo band! Not only for werewolves! I
don’t have a tail, goddammmitt!!!!
Tim: #ing lies!
Tim: I bet you didn’t even kill one person
Tim: your a pathetic werewolf
Tim: bet you eat raw hamburger so you dont have to eat anyone
Jesus Christ: I’m a nice werewolf…I mean person…!
Jesus Christ: No, no, no…you’re just confusing me!!!
Tim : that’s what happens when you get tired from being out all night
eating and killing people
Tim: or killing and eating
Jesus Christ: Eat and then kill!!! Haha!!!
Jesus Christ: Tell you what, you can eat me!!! Haha!!!
Tim: ok, no gay werewolves allowed in this conversation ok?
Tim: speaking of, I wonder if there is such a thing as a gay
Tim: that would be a great b movie
Jesus Christ: Wolfman Jack…gay as they come…
Tim: gay werewolves of london?
Tim: you bastard werewolf
Tim: those answers didnt make me feel love at all
Jesus Christ: Oh…you wanted to feel love…my mistake!!!
Tim: of course I did, I feel like everyone hates me and it makes me
Jesus Christ: I love you…
Jesus Christ: I just don’t know how to show it sometimes… :-
Tim: that’s because werewolves are sociopaths
Tim: so its ok
Jesus Christ: I’m glad you use the term werewolves rather than homo canines.
I hate that term.
Tim: yeah, that is so wrong
Tim: and bigoted
Tim: like werewolves can even help that they are gay
Jesus Christ: That’s right! It not like we chose it or anything. Also we
don’t reproduce well because of it…hence, almost no werewolves.
Tim: you poor pole smoking shape shifter
Jesus Christ: Next time I have lunch with you, you will see that I don’t my
Tim: I am not sure how to take that
Jesus Christ: Ohhh…I don’t mean anything nasty or terrifying…just that I’m
going to have a well-done burger or something. Don’t be scared….
Tim: you know, its sort of tough to know how to read between the
lines when werewolfs are yammering
Jesus Christ: You should try figuring me out at midnight…