[TCD 2018] Through a Meme Dankly

Through a Meme Dankly

DBCowboy

(The following is a complete transcription of a letter found abandoned on the desk of the Oval Office of the White House, Washington D.C.)

To: Madam President
1600 Pennsylvania Ave.
Washington D.C.
November 13, 2027

Madam President, I write this letter with a heavy heart. I write it with sorrow and extreme reluctance, but I feel compelled to write it all the same.

My name is Dr. Gunther Davis. I am, was, a lead pharmacologist at MultiPharm. The name may be familiar as I was the person responsible for developing the Supervaccine two years ago that eradicated every known flu that mankind had been suffering from. If you remember, it was so popular that it went world-wide. As you may be aware, your mandatory vaccine program for every living soul on the planet insured that every single person now carried my vaccine.

And it is a killer.

I gave you a chance. I truly did. There was a cure, something as simple as an OH group addition on a carbon ring that would have saved humanity. Something so simple that just another injection would have caused no harm to anyone ever.

I was skeptical of your policies after the election. Your heavy-handed approach to foreign policy, your authoritarian steps domestically. But I thought that maybe if I just waited a little bit, things would turn around.
Instead, things got worse.
But still I waited, waiting until the last minute to deliver my cure to the toxin that you had so gleefully mandated that everyone get. You see, my vaccine does cure every known flu and lethal virus, but the catch is that after 24 months, the immunoglobulins in the blood start to congeal and solidify. After a brief bit of pain, the body is left a statue, dead. The blood and fluids solidified inside. There is no way to cure the onset. There is no way to stop it.

I was about to deliver the cure inside a booster dose of my miracle vaccine when I was fired. You see, I made a meme mocking your administration. I was joking online and made a meme insulting your administration.

Soon afterwards I was fired. My bank accounts frozen. My wife and children were forced to leave me or either suffer the same fate. My children weren’t even allowed back in school until they publicly denounced me. My wife, the same.
All access to social media, cable, water, sewer, electric, rent, finances were shut off to me because I insulted your administration. My only option was to enter a re-education center and hope for the best or live among the underground community, cut off from all ties to my family, friends, work, and life.

As a result, I was never able to offer the cure for my poison.

It only takes a few hours once the headaches start. Then you won’t have to worry about your place in history any longer.

No one will.

Kindest regards,

Dr. Gunther Davis

a reply to: DBCowboy


Justified.

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus



It was fun being so evil and dark.


I can see the allure.

a reply to: DBCowboy

I really don't believe Gunther would have done this. Now you and Augustus more than likely are pinning this crap on Gunther using him as a patsy for your quest for world domination. You may fool some people on here but I'm not buying what your selling.

a reply to: Tarzan the apeman.

It takes place in the future.

Gunther has time to "mature".

a reply to: DBCowboy

It is kind of hard to mature when you are Ree Ree from being beaten all the time.

I will say this much it is a good story Great work.

a reply to: Tarzan the apeman.

Thanks. This one was fun to write.

a reply to: DBCowboy

Great story DB! It's a bit morbid, but would make a cool movie.

Reminds of a quote that I love... the best way to predict the future is to invent it.

a reply to: Bone75


Thanks!

I was listening to a very dark muse today.

originally posted by: DBCowboy
a reply to: Bone75


Thanks!

I was listening to a very dark muse today.

Does Gunther at least save his family, or does he just strike a majestic pose and turn to stone?

a reply to: Bone75


Everyone goes away.

Everyone.

Nice one DBC. S+F

a reply to: DictionaryOfExcuses



Thank you!

Glad you liked it!

a reply to: DBCowboy

that was great to read. i like your idea about the vaccine

......... oh, suddenly i have a headache.. had a vaccine not long ag

originally posted by: lucia2389
a reply to: DBCowboy

that was great to read. i like your idea about the vaccine

......... oh, suddenly i have a headache.. had a vaccine not long ag

Glad you enjoyed it.

The headache won't last for long. . . . . . .

a reply to: DBCowboy

Great stuff! But, um, are you sure that is actually fiction? Lol S+F.

originally posted by: MisterMcKill
a reply to: DBCowboy

Great stuff! But, um, are you sure that is actually fiction? Lol S+F.

Uh. . . . yes?

a reply to: DBCowboy

S&F I liked it... call me sick !

a reply to: DBCowboyLoved the story, and the title Nice play on the PKD story.
Well done, I want to flag it but for some reason I can't flag anything.

flagged

Ironically, the only people to survive are the 'vaccines are bad' crowd. Maybe they all get polio shortly after though.

Nice story DB.