What does success mean to you?

After getting into something of a derailing conversation with another poster over the meaning of success, in a different thread the idea came up to make a thread on what success actually means. So I thought I would make it.

What do you consider to be success in life? Is it obtaining a specific net worth, leaving X to your children, merely having children, not getting fired from your job, obtaining some specific item?

I'll go first. I've come to the realization over the past couple years that when I talk of success, I seem to have very different metrics of this than what most people have. The people I talk to generally define success along the lines of having some sort of family/loved ones, learning a skill that can support them, having steady employment, and the benefits that go along with that like reliable access to food, shelter, and the disposable income to have fun with the people they like. Sometimes it goes a step further and success means being the boss at a company, owning a home, being debt free, or being able to cover their childrens college education.

All of this is very individualistic though, and I tend to view the world as a bunch of tiny parts working together, making one part better doesn't make the machine noticeably better, and this is where my disconnect with most people comes in. To me, success means doing something great that benefits thousands or millions of people at once. Creating a wildly successful product that brings enjoyment to people is one way to do this (and the way that most people can identify with this goal because it's very lucrative) but it's not the only way. Another way one could be successful in life would be to destroy billions of dollars in debt that are impacting people (similar to what John Oliver just did, though he did so on a much smaller scale), or to create grants that build massive public works and opportunity (like Benjamin Franklin and the Philadelphia Fund, though things there didn't work out exactly as planned).

While optimal success isn't necessarily defined as positively affecting millions of people in my mind and there can be success for a person on a local level as well. For example, if someone could end the drug problem in my town I would consider that to be a successful life.

I guess that what I'm getting at is that success to me isn't measured by number of possessions, size of your home, family status, or any other personal measure individuals typically compare themselves with. To me success is measured in how much good for society a person does in their life. If a person gets a nice job, takes care of their family, and so on that to me isn't being a success, they're simply maintaining the status quo and looking out for themselves. If their family disappeared society would continue into the future on pretty much the same course. Successful people actively make the future a better place.

How about everyone else? How do you define success?

In life, one has to expect to win some and lose some. If you win more often, you're successful.

Some people have very little and they're some of the richest people I've ever met. They're satisfied.

a reply to: Aazadan

I would leave this world and this dream of life a joyful person if truly I was a creative, authentic, loving, kind, peaceful, joyful, blissful, compassionate being to all other beings.

I aspire to reduce suffering and pain, act from a place of compassion, and become self-realized.

That is how I define a successful incarnation.

a reply to: Galadriel

You are describing NightStar.

originally posted by: Snarl
In life, one has to expect to win some and lose some. If you win more often, you're successful.

Some people have very little and they're some of the richest people I've ever met. They're satisfied.

But then, what do you consider winning? Is it winning to convince an employer to pay you $20/hour? Is it winning when you achieve the median wage? When you buy a house? When you have an awesome dog and/or child? Is it winning if you see your child achieve more in life than you did? Is it still winning if your child did that while you achieved less than your parents?

originally posted by: olaru12

So you equate success with perseverance? Does that mean you consider a person who runs a viable business but had many things in life handed to them, to be less successful than the person who won't end it all early but for who life is a daily struggle due to poor circumstances or life choices? Would you consider a person who makes bad choices, but continues to make them to be successful because they keep at it and continue to make choices?

originally posted by: Aazadan

originally posted by: olaru12

So you equate success with perseverance? Does that mean you consider a person who runs a viable business but had many things in life handed to them, to be less successful than the person who won't end it all early but for who life is a daily struggle due to poor circumstances or life choices? Would you consider a person who makes bad choices, but continues to make them to be successful because they keep at it and continue to make choices?

I've made terrible choices in life, stupid choices, but eventually saw my failures were of my own making, didn't make excuses and changed when the alcohol and drugs fought me every inch of the way. Still being alive and loved by people is all the success I need. That's why I count my blessings every single day, make amends, and dance like no one is watching.

a reply to: olaru12

Is that necessarily perseverance though? It's good that you turned your life around, but wouldn't that rather be a contrast with making better life choices now opposed to the past, so your success isn't necessarily pushing through it but rather gaining the wisdom/fortitude to make better choices?

a reply to: Aazadan

First of all I will never leave any X to my children. That stuff is way too hard to find. I will eat every last pill of it before I go, even if that means I'll have to be buried with glow sticks and a jar of Vaporub.

a reply to: Aazadan

Buy seriously, success, to me, means I left the world in better shape than it was when I came into it. I have no need of great wealth or fame. As long as my kids turn out well, which they have, I am happy.

Good Thread mate. And I agree with you. Success will mean different things to different people. Everyone is different.

For me success means two things. The first is happiness and for me that is a family, career that I enjoy passionately, kids and friends with enough security to enjoy all of that without worry. Security meaning income, insurance etc.

The second part is where people differ. Some of us have a need to expand and others do not. It's not greed or materialism or a mental disorder, but it's just a need for more. Maybe it just means the need for individual growth. I can't be happy in a job with a boss, I need to be the boss. I also can't be happy without freedom. That means freedom to travel and move about. The third thing I need is the ability to give back and make a difference somehow through volunteering, charity work or something else.

This is the one part of our discussion and I'll open a thread on the second part, which isn't just about what success means but the question of whether anyone can obtain wealth or if that is just luck?

originally posted by: Aazadan
a reply to: olaru12

Is that necessarily perseverance though? It's good that you turned your life around, but wouldn't that rather be a contrast with making better life choices now opposed to the past, so your success isn't necessarily pushing through it but rather gaining the wisdom/fortitude to make better choices?

Semantics....

I guess you needed to be there to really understand. Sorry, I'm not as articulate as you. My explanation apparently fell short somehow...

Anything that would deem me successful in the eyes of authority and/ or society (hate that word) I have a strong aversion to. The education system, the corporate ladder, the mortgage, the retirement fund...and everything the middle and upper classes strive for to maintain a status quo. I suppose over the years I have developed an op positional defiance of a sort, and measure myself by my ability to obtain happiness by doing none of the above.
To me, at this moment in time...that is success. Will I feel the same a decade or two from now? Who knows.

originally posted by: olaru12
Semantics....

I guess you needed to be there to really understand. Sorry, I'm not as articulate as you are!! My explanation apparently fell short somehow...

But it's not semantics. Do you consider yourself successful because of where you are in relation to where you were, or if you had gotten to your current position in life without any pitfalls would you consider that successful?

Good thread..

Success to me is the following..

1. Achieving the professional goals I set for myself when my career started.
2. Pushing myself as hard as I can in my chosen field.
3. Being financially viable so i can do what I want, when I want, how I want without having to worry about the financial consequences.

For me life has been pretty successful, rewarding and fun. It's come at the price of some other things but I have lived life the way I want.

To me success is crushing my opponents into obliteration stealing their soul for eternity.

originally posted by: NewzNose
a reply to: Galadriel

You are describing NightStar.

Ha! I count NightStar as a dear friend! As many of us here do.

She is pretty darn awesome and a truly compassionate being

originally posted by: Aazadan
How about everyone else? How do you define success?

Accomplishment of 1z personal set goals...

a reply to: Galadriel

Birds of a feather...

she is the definition of "caring".

There needs to be more people like the two of you in this bitter world.