Thoughts or inssights , I could use a little help.

In the last few months an amazing lady has came into my bussiness 4 or 5 times. Each time we have talked,just general chit chat. A few days ago she came in we talked a little more then usally , about careers, realationships, children ,even about politics. It seemed to me, She may have some interest in me, as I do in her.

In talking to her, I've learnt that she has an on an off boyfriend. An enough about her to find her on social media. Social media has shown me that she is even more amazing person then I even thought. Also, that she told me she was a little older than she actual is. 27 not 31. I'm 37.

I've been thinking about her ever since. I don't want this to be a miss conection, but I would never interfere with an on going relationship or contact her out of the blue on social media.

So, the next time she comes, in I want to let her know I'm interested in her. I'm not 100 pecent she is interested in me, so I don't want to come off as a werdo ! Thanks A T S for any help.

a reply to: DEANORULES24

No guts no glory, just keep yourself from having expectations. Tread in the shallow end first, before diving into the deep end head first.

originally posted by: DEANORULES24


So, the next time she comes, in I want to let her know I'm interested in her. I'm not 100 pecent she is interested in me, so I don't want to come off as a werdo ! Thanks A T S for any help.

No matter what you do, you will come off as a weirdo. Perhaps that's why she is attracted to you....

Small lies that make no sense end up to be because of big lies. Figure this age thing out.

Well, she DID lie about her age, which is weird. And she has a boyfriend.

Lying right off the bat is never a good sign.


a reply to: DEANORULES24

If she happens to be your soulmate. Don't be to shy.

If she changed her age to be more compatible with you.

Hello....Tell her you looked her up on FB. Tell her you wanted to be friends.

Then you chickened out. At that moment pay close attention to her response.

The on again off again thing might be to spur you along before you lose her.

I am older than you so listen to your elder.

Even if she says no thank you to your coy advances.

At least then, you won't spend the rest of your life wondering...What if.

If she is a liar I would stay away from her.

Sal

a reply to: DEANORULES24

a reply to: DEANORULES24

Liars are no good..
Don't beat yourself up about it. And by that I mean are you a glutton for punishment?
You're asking for it.

I'm not being funny.

a reply to: DEANORULES24

Just my o, warning signs about her, 'has a boyfriend', lied about her age, isn't begin forthright about her intentions, repeatedly letting you come onto her… a manipulator for sure.

I would pass.

Age is the most common of the lies, she might be lying on social media to make herself younger. Most women I know over 30, rarely claim it.

Other women make themselves older to seem more mature, but it's not something you find in older women.

Frankly, I wouldn't see the age thing as a big lie, the on-again off-again, however is another thing. People don't have those kind of relationships without major baggage involved. I'd see that and just let it go. She most likely has strong feelings for the guy, which is why it's on-off.

You want a woman with out that kind of baggage. Leads to less heartache.

originally posted by: DEANORULES24
In talking to her, I've learnt that she has an on an off boyfriend.

Stop right there and consider if she has a permenant boyfriend and is looking for the safe leap from one relationship to another without letting on about here real relationship with her current flame. If true, you could be the next in line.

Be careful but good luck.

I am agreeing with a lot that is being said....The lying part, so she lied about her age or did she? You are trusting Facebook as your information source?? Not the most reliable of knowledge of a person in detail because not everyone shares every detail on social media sites for various reasons. So, I wouldn't just yet say she is lying about her age. It does look like she was upfront about the on and off boyfriend and you could look at that two ways. 1. Competition and/or 2. Complexity. If she says yes she will go out with you, eventually, you will need to ask the question if she is still on and off with her boyfriend, hence the complexity.

Now, if you really want to know about this girl, I would suggest doing or having someone you trust do some real investigating to find out some of the questions you have such as age. There are plenty of sources you can use to find out a few details without feeling like a stalker.

Most men would give the sort of advice that the male posters on here already have, ie go for it, nothing ventured and all that, but I would urge caution.

I wouldn't make any move at all unless I got a definite green light from her. Women will usually make it very plain that they want a relationship with a guy and you wont be in any doubt when that happens. The fact that you're asking for advice sounds like she hasn't given that green light, just been friendly. If you go in all guns blazing now, you're likely to come up against that familiar cold force field. Don't be tempted (how successful is the brazen approach for men anyway? Think about it).

There are worrying signs...the "on-again-off-again boyfriend" you mention and the age gap are further reasons for a cautious approach. I wouldn't bet on her becoming your wife. Even if you get the 'go' sign, a brief fling might be the best you can hope for.

Keep your emotions in check or you could get strung along horribly.

a reply to: CJCrawley
Not all women are obvious when they are interested. I never was. It usually took a friend whispering on my behalf, because I was too afraid of rejection.

Also, the age thing..... I never give my real birthday when filling out info online, usually the right day but different year. INot necessarily a huge flag.

a reply to: chelsdh

...I did qualify it with "usually"...

a reply to: DEANORULES24
Run.
Not only from her, but also run from that mind set your using to pick your woman.

Either way you choose to run....wear boots....maybe some RedWings, and good luck, brother.

a reply to: DEANORULES24

I yield to our lady ATS members on this one. We have a bunch of smart and sweet ladies who can give you the best advice.

But, from me? Go for it....you'll never know if you don't try.

Ladies? Give this member some advice!!!

MS

a reply to: DEANORULES24


You could 'friend' her on face book, and open conversations on a

public site will give you subtle signs of her life and friends ....

much can be gleaned from fb about the lives people lead!

OR ....

Next time she comes into your business, depending on what time

it is invite her for either a spot of lunch, or a drink before going

home,

Not a date ...

nothing heavy ...

just casual and see how things go from there.

originally posted by: JessicaS


Age is the most common of the lies, she might be lying on social media to make herself younger.
Most women I know over 30, rarely claim it.

Other women make themselves older to seem more mature, but it's not something you find in older women.

Frankly, I wouldn't see the age thing as a big lie.

LOL!! Nail on head ...

No body except my immediate family know my age ....

When I was young I lied about my age to get into places.

I have lied about my age to get jobs.

When I was older I lied about my age for much the same reasons.

I no longer need to lie about my age, but never tell anyone, just

let them assume what they like ... and invariably they are wrong

sometimes as much as 20years wrong.

originally posted by: DEANORULES24
In the last few months an amazing lady has came into my bussiness 4 or 5 times. Each time we have talked,just general chit chat. A few days ago she came in we talked a little more then usally , about careers, realationships, children ,even about politics. It seemed to me, She may have some interest in me, as I do in her.

In talking to her, I've learnt that she has an on an off boyfriend. An enough about her to find her on social media. Social media has shown me that she is even more amazing person then I even thought. Also, that she told me she was a little older than she actual is. 27 not 31. I'm 37.

I've been thinking about her ever since. I don't want this to be a miss conection, but I would never interfere with an on going relationship or contact her out of the blue on social media.

So, the next time she comes, in I want to let her know I'm interested in her. I'm not 100 pecent she is interested in me, so I don't want to come off as a werdo ! Thanks A T S for any help.

Just ask - even if she says no, she will be flattered. Let her decide about the on-again-off-again dude. No need for 'exclusivity'. Just have fun. Ask her next time she comes in - not on 'anti-social' media.