Life, Ego, Responsibility, Love, and Relationships.

I am going to discuss several philosophical subjects which I believe are key to understanding life and our own self improvement or spiritual growth. This encompasses many aspects and these aspects all affect our benefit and growth. Much of what I will say will be controversial to many while others may find truth in it. Opinions are opinions and each opinion should be respected since everyone has a right to their own opinion. Different points of view are encouraged so long as it is done respectfully. The examination of these issues is healthy so long as done in an atmosphere of mutual respect. This is a part of life and necessary to grow.

Just keep in mind that this thread is intended to help those who are looking for answers, not those who have all the answers. I do not claim to have all the answers myself but I think some of my research and experiences can benefit others and hopefully some other postings will benefit me.

To enter into the discussion it is prudent to look down the road to see where we are going...we should plan ahead. Someday and somehow we are all going to leave this Earth through the mechanism we call death. Some of my discussion assumes the reader believes in an afterlife but that is not necessary to get value from this discussion and the subject of an afterlife is best discussed in another thread. Once we die, whether we believe in a judgement by a god or not, we may look back and ask "What have I accomplished?" or "What am I taking with me of value?". To answer those questions, one would need to ask, "what can I take with me of value?". Here's a short list:
1. What we have learned
2. Our relationships
3. Who we are and the characteristics we have gained such as love, patience, wisdom, etc.
4. What we have experienced (which should lead to learning)
Obviously wealth, power and other possessions are not on the list. Also, note that taking an abundance of any of these items would deprive nothing from anyone and actually some items give more to others.
Considering these items, what can we do to ensure we have obtained the most which are on the list? (To be discussed in the body of this article)
Note: Some of the links and articles I reference are from various religious perspectives. Many religions have great philisophical truths and I choose to use the parts of them that I believe are helpful to self improvement whether I subscribe to the particular religion or not.

Below are items (A through F) that relate and will influence our ability to obtain or increase items on the list above.
A. The Mystery of Life
B. Knowing Yourself
C. Responsibility
D. Ego
E. Love and Relationships
F. Hazards to Development

A. Life is a mystery:
There are many conflicting philosophies, religions, and sets of cultural norms across the planet. There is some commonality in some yet there always seem to be some contradictions between them so it becomes difficult to determine what is true. Although certain "holy books" contain many truths and are proclaimed as the inspired word of God, evidence of such claims may be scant, especially when there are flaws in such books that either indicate they were not written by the claimed authors or not in the time frame specified (subject to a discussion in another thread). Different writings claim different things about the meaning of life and what a god may want humans to do. The answers are not obvious. The fact that the answer is not obvious is a clue. If there is a god and he is powerful, he would be powerful enough to be sure we know what he wants (if he wants to make it obvious). Therefore, because it is not obvious, I conclude it is our responsibility to learn the meaning of life, whether there is a god, and what that god or God may expect of us. I believe this is a point of logic which is hard to refute since we are told to seek God and this attempt to learn is a seeking of God, if there is one. (Note: I do believe in a God but the reason why is a subject for another thread and would derail this thread). Therefore, we should look for the clues ourselves and come to our own conclusions. This includes all considerations including religion including beliefs outside what were raised in. Just because we were raised with a certain set of beliefs, those beliefs of themselves, are not enough to conclude they are correct or incorrect. Conclusion: Seek to learn, item 1 in the list above.

B. Know yourself:
Who are you? Are you your name? Are you made up of your beliefs? Are you how you feel? You are none of these. Your name is a label. Our beliefs may change and our feelings change constantly. It is important to look inside ourselves and know who we are at your core. We should learn to understand ourselves. Learn to know why we want what we want and why we do what we do. Learn what ego is (discussion later) and how and when it will affect behavior. Realize what we do is a reflection of who we are! Once we know who we are, we automatically have a set of values and build on them to re-enforce who we are. In this way, we are true to ourselves, are comfortable with ourselves, and even love ourselves. Then we can build on what you we and acquire the characteristics we want. (Item 3 in the list above)

C. Responsibility:
We have as much responsibility to ourselves as we have to others. Responsibility is the foundation to a healthy society and spiritual life. We must not transfer our responsibility to someone else. Many people shift their own responsibility to others rather than holding themselves responsible. If people would be responsible themselves rather than trying to put the responsibility on others, people would be healthier, happier, and even wars would end. Here are examples of shifting responsibility to others:
1. Transfer your responsibility for your health to your doctor, nutritionalist, or other health professional.
2. Transfer your responsibility for your spiritual well being and growth to your church or minister.
3. Transfer your responsibility for what you do to your boss or society leaders.
4. Transfer your responsibility for the failed relationship to the other person.
There is no one who should care more about your spiritual growth, your health, what you do, and your relationships more than you. How then, could it make sense to expect someone else to be responsible for you and expect them to care more than you? It makes sense to use other people who are experts in various areas to provide more information regarding what to do but the final decision and responsibility for what is done is ours and ours alone. No one else can get the blame if we make the wrong decision, choose the wrong doctor or even choose the wrong minister or religion then follow bad advice. The holicost would never have happened if those involved did not shift the responsibility for what they were doing to their leaders (There is a free ebook written by a Canadian psychologist, Dr. Robert Altemeyer, called "The Authoritarians" which describes this kind of responsibility shifting). This is why we should question and understand the judgements of our doctor, minister, and leaders. If we don't agree or their advice does not work we should consult another expert in the field or do the research ourselves and learn. Delegate or buy a book from an expert where needed to boost required knowledge to be responsible to yourself and others you love. The conclusion is to be responsible for our own health, spiritual growth, our own relationships, and what we do. Be willing to invest what is required for that which is important. (The proper application of responsibility will add to items 1 through 3 in the list above)

D. Ego
Learning how to handle our ego and what it is will prevent us from being side tracked away from who we want to be (item 3 above) and help our relationships (Item 2 above). The best illustration I have seen regarding how ego can interfere with a person's life is on this site:
Mind Control in America
The article discusses mind control in America but is really about how to prevent yourself from being manipulated by others through your ego. It also explains how to break out of the pattern of control by using love and patience.

There are two basic principles, one extending from the other, of seducing a soul from loyalty to the self it was born with. The first is a kind of "original sin" appeal to the ego, a seduction by means of suggestion/deception. You can cause a person to partake of some for-bidden experience by suggesting that it will provide him with an exalted state: power, glory, and riches, something that it cannot possibly deliver. You simply stroke your victim into believing that he can have what he selfishly wants to have, and be what he wants to be, without exerting any effort. All he has to do is believe and do as you say. This appeal is hypnotic in its effect because the deception sounds so reasonable to the ego that it allows the soul to bypass the alarm system that would ordinarily operate to keep it within the bounds of conscience. An example I often use concerns the boy whose dad has forbidden him to ride his bicycle. Along comes a friend who uses some challenge to the boy's ego, like a dare or a taunt, to make him override his dad's instructions and pedal off on his bike. This could be the lad's first experience with "forbidden fruit.

Once you experience the forbidden, the original hypnotic influence contained in the persuasion or deceit will alter your nature at the core, and you will become a creature of conditioning, subject to the presence of the person who seduced you. This second state is more powerful than hypnosis alone: it is animal magnetism. His very presence will become irresistible, and his authority beyond question. He will render you choiceless, compulsive.

So there you have it. The secret of resisting mind control and undoing your programming lies in your not becoming intimidated by pressure and challenge. You must practice forgiving and letting go of resentment and rage—repenting of the ego weakness that has made you vulnerable. In short, stop blaming others. Take a few minutes to look at your own fault. Your critic may have a good point, after all, and you might find it helpful.

The beauty of a patient, non-emotional response to pressure is that you gain power without ever having to do anything cruel to get it. The manipulator responds, while you remain calm and innocent. You can watch the adversary sting himself to death, or see him surrender to the good and change his life for the better. Even though you might have started out as the victim, isolated and controlled by a manipulator in possession of all the physical advantages, you can free yourself and take command of the situation simply by availing yourself of the true spirit of love. You can prevail over your adversary in the same way that Joseph prevailed over Pharaoh.

Everyone should realize their ego is not their true self and learn to recognize their ego. They should know when their ego is influencing what they do.

Difference between ego and self

Ego is considered in relation with pride. In Hinduism and Buddhism, ego is considered as the identity over identity, it is how humans see themselves. Ego is believed to be more temporal, where it is created now. Humans and only a certain number of animals are considered to have ego. Ego is believed to put down a person’s ‘spontaneous identity to represent'. In terms of spirituality, ego is considered as the sense an individual that believed it is human and believes that it must fight for itself but is unaware and unconscious of its own true nature. Many traditions seek to dissolve the ego, allowing the person’s true nature to come forth. That term has been regarded as Enlightenment, Nirvana, Fana, Presence, and the "Here and Now".

In terms of philosophy, the self is a description of how or what a person exactly is. It is the qualities that make a person individual or unique. The self is considered as the source of consciousness, the thing that is responsible for an individual's thoughts and actions or his nature.

The ego vs self-esteem
This article describes it well and I highly recommend a quick read of this article. It provides good examples of how the ego works and how to deal with it.

What I ultimately learnt was this: whenever you have a thought, whatever it may be, where is it coming from and is it to the benefit of your ego or your self esteem?

Your ‘self’ concept is founded on a high self esteem; what are your self beliefs (I am confident, I am honest, I am loyal) and do they help you actualise who you want to be in other words, your ideal ‘self’?

The ego is the opposite of self esteem. The problem with the ego is it can often ‘disguise’ itself as your self-esteem and it is important to become aware of this behaviour when it arises.

You have to re-direct you focus on yourself, your ‘true’ and not your ego or what others may (or may not) think about you. Be honest with yourself, what do you like about yourself and what do you not like about yourself? Do not challenge it, just accept it. The ego is concerned with emphasising strengths and de-emphasising weaknesses.

In short, your ego is the part of you that wants (not needs) stroked. It wants to feel important, wanted, and desired. These things are not necessary but a balance is healthy. To constantly feel unimportant and rejected is not healthy so in some cases and for periods of time some feeding of the ego can be healthy so long as it is not allowed to get out of hand. To do that it is important to differentiate between the real you and your ego. The real you is the part of you that calmly watches what goes on in the world and ultimately makes decisions to be true to your values. Your ego will compromise for quick gains. The real you is the part of you that may love or refuse to love. For example I would describe myself as a compassionate loving person who cares about others. I am a curious person and am trying to learn all the time. I try to be responsible to those I love and who love me. Although I consider myself to be an intellectual, I do not consider that to be a part of me, but one of my characteristics.

The best advice I can give to isolate the ego is to pay attention to your emotions when you feel complimented, insulted, have a success, or have a failure. That part of you that feels good or down is your ego. The feeling may not change the situation but it may change your reaction. If you recognize the feeling and the reaction, you may be able to over ride a negative reaction and gain something positive rather than being hurt or hindering yourself. If you are in a situation where you are constantly having your ego stroked, it can run away with you and you can lose control. You can become addicted when your wants become needs. Learn to pull yourself back or you will get hurt.

E. Love and Relationships

In order to actually love anyone else, a person needs to know themselves. They need to know who they are and who they are not. Who they are not is their ego. They need to understand their ego and how it is not really them. They should know when their ego is getting stroked and not let their ego get out of hand when it is stroked. If they develop a need for what is stroking their ego, they are letting their ego get out of hand.

To form a quality loving relationship, it is important to not only know yourself, but to love yourself.
One way to learn to love yourself:
I don't deserve to be loved

It's easier to tell ourselves that we don't deserve love - which then makes it our fault and gives us a feeling of control over not being loved - than to open to the loneliness, helplessness, and heartbreak of not being loved.

Having a healthy self-esteem (not ego boosting though ego stroking. However ego stroking can be a positive thing in the right situation with those who could use a boost in their self-esteem) can help a person love themselves.
Here is a good article for determining if you have low self esteem and boosting it.
How to boost self-esteem

If you have low self-esteem then you are better than you think you are. This is the definition of low self-esteem. When your self-esteem improves, it’s because your self-knowledge has improved; just as the ugly duckling in Hans Christian Anderson’s famous tale had to learn its true nature before it could become fulfilled.

If you catch yourself doing this - for example, telling yourself you're stupid because you made a mistake - then force yourself to find examples that contradict your own negative blanket statement.

Low self-esteem makes us magnify failures and personal faults and minimize or completely discount successes and personal strengths. Don't do this. Be fair. If other people say you are attractive, clever, kind, fun, or whatever, respect them enough to at least consider that what they say is a probability.

To have quality relationships, it is necessary to care about others and be willing to love them. Loving is always a risk but I believe it is a risk worth taking. In my own case, I have been hurt many times by loving others but I have made the conscious choice to continue loving anyway. That conscious choice has paid off in my life since I have since met someone who loves very deeply. In any event, I would still feel good about loving because I was true to myself. By being true to myself, I could continue to love myself and feel good about myself. I keep my self respect because I follow my principles.

Based on observation, I believe many people do not genuinely care about others (I still hope to be proven wrong and hope this is a pessimistic view). Most relationships are built around what the "self" can get out of it. Examples in society include those seeking "adventure" from strangers who don't care about them and who they don't care about. Rather than this, they should be rewarding the ones they love with their presence and attention. However, they seek to do otherwise and show selfishness rather than love. They want their ego's stroked and do not care whether their actions build up or tear down those who they claim to love. Their love is a superficial front that is not real and not deep.

Many people are not interested in a relationship unless they get exactly what they want out of it whether the other person gets anything out of it or not. Many have proven themselves to be very superficial and not care about values, principles, or noble actions of themselves or others. Some people prove themselves to be judgemental of others when they do not know the situation and prefer to judge based on inaccurate opinions and/or perverted religious teachings that emphasize guilt, condemnation, and death.

The world needs to step out of the rat race and look at what their actions and "knowledge" are producing. These activities are ruining relationships and ruining the world. The world needs to put love and their own code of ethics first then let everything else fall into place. They need to determine their own code of ethics from scratch rather than being handed a perverted one for free which may come from a manipulative individual or organization. They need to take the time to question and learn for themselves.

For a real relationship, love should go beyond what works for you. It should be to a point where you want what works for the other person even if it is not good for you. Your concern should be for the happiness of the one you love rather than what is best for you. Their happiness and well being should be primary with everything else secondary. However, when care of self serves the one you love, it should still be an important consideration.

People aren't happy because their priorities are out of whack and they do not know themselves. They can't establish and hold relationships that way. They will not be able to leave this life with much if anything of any value unless they change.

There are various psychological reasons that some people have difficulty with relationships. This article discusses how those who feel like they don't deserve a good relationship and what they can do to improve the situation.

Feeling like you don't deserve

If a person feels they don't deserve and they feel they have done wrong things, the best thing they can do is to acknowledge the things they have done and resolve to change. Then reach out for the positive relationships that will help them rebuild their lives productively.

Some people will enter into relationships that re-enforce their beliefs about themselves rather than entering into a relationship because it is healthy and they have found someone they believe deserves their love.
How Our Relationships Reveal Our Beliefs

Many people are consistently attracted to people who reinforce their limiting beliefs. If you believe that you don’t deserve to be loved, then you will be attracted to people who are incapable of loving you. They will also be attracted to you. No matter how hard you try, that relationship will never be deeply satisfying. This will only serve to reinforce your limiting belief that you don’t deserve to be loved.

Low self esteem carries with it a sense of unworthiness. If we feel unworthy of a mutually respectful relationship, we will be attracted to people who lack the ability to show respect. They will also be attracted to us. It may not be real obvious at first, but our radar can sense the signs and draw us in. In this case, familiarity will probably breed contempt and our belief that we are unworthy of respect will be reinforced.

Once we become consciously aware that it is our beliefs that are creating an unpleasant relationship experience, we have taken the first step toward freedom. Then we can take decisive steps to dismantle those limiting beliefs.

When limiting beliefs are replaced with empowering beliefs, it changes the kind of people we are attracted to, and the kind of people who are attracted to us. It changes the whole dynamic of our relationships. We begin to build relationships with people who reinforce our positive beliefs about ourselves. This will completely change what we take into a relationship, and that, in turn, will change the way we experience our relationships.

If we don't believe we are loveable, we can sabatoge our own relationships:
The single greatest attractive quality- confidence

If you don’t like yourself in the sense of seeing yourself as loveable, you won’t believe it when someone says to you ‘I love you.’ It will go through the filter of your low self esteem and come out as ‘I want something’ After all you know they really can’t love you because you believe that no one could.

You will always fantasize that the person will leave at any time. You will consciously or subconsciously sabotage the relationship. this will be done by demanding excessive assurances of love, becoming overly possessive, over reacting to incidences that a trite. You may even become subservient, demanding, dominating. You will always be seeking ways to reject your partner before he/she rejects you.

Interestingly it has been observed that such people tend to choose partners who are most likely to eventually reject. A self-full-filling prophecy. They fight mercilessly to get love, then sabotage the relationship if they are successful or conclude that they are unlovable anyway if they don’t. a viscous self-fulfilling prophecy.

Before you begin to love you must have the inner confidence your are worthy of love. You must come to the conviction that you deserve to love and be loved. You must conclude, “I am loveable. I am admirable. I am worthy of happiness and love. I deserve to have the best mate there is for me.”

This article describes what happens when you don't love yourself and you sabatage your relationship because you think you are not worthy.
On Loving Someone who Doesn't Love Themselves

What happens when there is someone in your life that is so amazing and wonderful, someone who looks at you like you are the most cherished thing on the planet, and you find yourself feeling unbearably distant because you just can’t feel their love? And yet, in your brain, the only sounds are:

How can that be? Don’t they know how awful I am? How repulsive? I bet they are only pretending to love me. I bet they just think that they love me, but someday they will realize that they were mistaken. Don’t get comfortable. Don’t let your guard down.

Before long you find yourself picking fights. You find yourself taking apart every bit of the relationship, aggressively, trying to locate the evidence that will support your lack of self-worth. You find yourself sabotaging something good, because you don’t think that you deserve it.

The thing about love – reciprocal, intimate, lasting, nourishing, fantastic, gorgeous, exciting love – is that it requires that both parties believe that they deserve to be there. It is impossible to participate wholly in a relationship with another person when you are constantly tripping over your feet, getting in your own way, and demanding all of your attention.

Therefore to establish a loving relationship the following are required:
1. Know yourself
2. Have a healthy self-esteem and love yourself
3. Genuinely care about others or the one you love.
4. Accept the one you love for who they are and give them the freedom to be themselves.
5. Put the one you love first.

F. Hazards to Development
There are many hazards to development of the characteristics we may desire. Some of the characteristics I want to develop include:
1. Patience
2. Greater love for others
3. Wisdom
4. Understanding and knowledge about life and how to help myself and others
5. More and deeper relationships.

Hazards to these developments include:
1. Ego
2. Distractions such as on the job distractions, anxiety about the state of the world, any kind of fear, too much attention to superficial information and entertainment.
3. Failure to know one's self
4. Failure to examine your own moral values and whether they are productive.

Items 1 and 3 have been discussed. Item 2 is obvious.

The failure to examine our own moral values and determine whether they are productive can hinder our development since it can prevent us from developing the characteristics we desire and can even hinder relationships. For example, it is important not to judge others. However, many people judge others based on their belief system which is many times guided by religious belief. Judgement of others is a difficult situation since regardless of our belief system, we cannot possibly know why a particular person does what they do. This is because we cannot understand their life (without living it and experiencing what they experienced) and know what has happened to them which can affect their wants and needs.

When people join a religion and take that for a set of morals without questioning, they make themselves infants with regard to learning about life. Life is meant to be a mystery for each of us to solve individually. Taking a set of morals and answers to life from a canned solution rather than learning on your own removes the ability to learn unless the person examines those morals for themselves and independently decides they make sense. Once a canned set of morals and answers are accepted learning can be stagnant to non-existent thereby depriving the religious believer of spiritual advancement, learning, and improvement of the self. Not all believers may be this way but many majority are. This kind of system teaches group thought rather than individual thought. It can be used by society's "leaders" to control people and justify or get people to accept evil (this is happening today) . Individual thought is necessary to learn and improve one's self.

All the items I have discussed here, though several are interrelated. Strengthening or improving on one will improve one or more of the others. For example raising our self-esteem will improve our ability or willingness to take a chance on love and our ability to understand ourselves and love ourselves. Understanding ourselves will help us improve our relationships. Taking responsibility for ourselves will help us be true to ourselves and we should be more comfortable with ourselves and improve our relationships, health, and other matters. Overall, we should all continue to learn and question so we can grow. If we decide we have all the answers, we will not feel the need to learn and we will stagnate. None of us has all the answers, so we continue to learn.

I hope this at least helps some.

zbrain75


Just keep in mind that this thread is intended to help those who are looking for answers, not those who have all the answers. I do not claim to have all the answers myself but I think some of my research and experiences can benefit others and hopefully some other postings will benefit me.

No one has all the answers (correct ones).
So thank you for sharing some that you have discovered.

I think you have created an excellent and much needed discussion.
Especially about learning to balance the forces of "Ego" , because it cannot be eliminated and probably shouldn't be.

It's a daily struggle to find healthy self-esteem while avoiding narcissistic self-destruction.
Learning to Share Fairly is another important aspect to balancing our relationships with each other and forging a positive future.

So although I often want to tell other people stuff, I try to also listen to others and understand their point of view so that I can see what it is like in their shoes. Seeing things from someone else's life can really help.

Going to go back to reading.
Thanks again.

zbrain75


I hope this at least helps some.

I believe it can help anyone because we all need to at least be reminded of many of these points.

This is an excellent thread and you are my favorite poster of the day.
I am being very judgmental about you, in a good way.

I hope others seriously sit down and read this over.
No one's perfect of course, but these are surely quality insights you offer.

BUmp to read

Looks wonderful

Excellent post! Very well done.

I sure do hope you are (or will be) a parent. This is the stuff kids need to hear and know.

Bravo, OP.

Alot of the ideas are good, and a look at how to overcome lower mind and gain higher mind before you leave. But, the part about shifting responsibilities is wrong. Everyone is born into societies. There are cosmic ones too. Good societies use their technologies, clean ones by the way, to enhance all the people who are family. So medicine, which is a tangible thing in a "tangible" testing ground is put here for use, we have put on earth, cannabis and various coffees, stimulants and natural coc aines, some of which put you to sleep for surgery, we have barbituates, poppies for example, and yet massive control and abuses of these things often done and run by CIA and royal families. That the medicines we need are put here to begin with by the Higher Powers that caretake earth should show us that real tangible things are needed. We have to be in this world, not just focus on outside. Live the life given for its a gift and grow up more here.

We have food abused.

People should be in good societies, we shouldn't have to reinvent the wheel a thousand times over, but progress as a whole with good and real breakthroughs being used by all.

That is a kind of responsibility too. Its like the master test one. Do you shine light for all, wanting a better society. Yes we can get out of this to Beyond but people do things there too. Its like societies there too. Eutopian ones, where all are living in abundance and healthy and able to work at many interesting task they wish to learn to accomplish, with lots of time outs for families. Here, you'll find not everything gives way to meditational, to waking up, to gaining HS contact or God/Goodness. And the reason is because some of it is to stir the compassion in those around you so that our socities can advance.

So relying on medicine, or if you're sick for a week, kids not in school, having phone numbers for services is not giving away your power or responsibility. Not having that means your in hell and need to work at your own problems abut also speak up about the world and start to work for some changes.

Because as part of the tests here, the Higher Ups made health issues a real thing, and made universal medicines for the masses, physicians always were needed, even in the past they have dug up artifacts, used in childbirth for breech births. Many mothers would die without doctors, and for every survivor of surgery, universal medical is wonderful. And its put here by design, that we need to grow at overcoming the abuses and corruption in our world and start to work for all the resources of earth and all breakthroughs in technology to belong to everyone.

There is a group of spiritually minded folk who assume that tangible things, medicines, equality and technology is all bad. That we're just supposed to float up and out as spirit. But in reality our spirits came here to grow up and the tangible is a part of the real lessons and real foundational concepts of infinity itself. Family here is Family there, and there is work to do here in the meantime.

And the technologies always progress. This universe is a kind of organic holographic technology. Technology is good and for all the population increases, there always has to be increases in technology given, ie upgrades given. That is how the universe works, and how the Managers on Higher Levels work overseeing the schools.

There is a group of negative entities and ETs and managers who are vying for power, that want all people to suffer in extreme poverty conditions without technology to grow spirit in a harsh way, but naturally in such a system the vast majority would end up in their lower realms, which is really what they're striving for, to steal souls.

Don't buy into that idea.

The difference between technology and lack is, Canada and the slums of Calcutta. The difference between Canada and eutopias is that the technologies are really based on the universal principles not the errors we're making, that theyre clean technologies that don't pollute, that all people are loved equally and that they are treated as family and resources are shared without slavery, yet that in those societies they also give back and do things, they work part time too.

wildtimes
Excellent post! Very well done.

I sure do hope you are (or will be) a parent. This is the stuff kids need to hear and know.

Bravo, OP.

What happened?
Where did you go?

Yes it is good stuff

reply to post by Stormdancer777


Oh no, I hope they didn't ban wildtimes. She was one of my favorite members. That really sucks.

The biggest wall I hit was that I couldn't help feel that all the attempts at explaining the difference between the self and the ego really end up just pointing at the self as the ego.

I don't think this is wrong. I think the ego and the self are the same. Your ego isn't who you are any more than your body is who you are, but it is a face that your body wears to allow Your Self to be perceived. Some egos are swollen and ugly, while others are radiant and beautiful, but denial of ego is really pointless and the effort is fruitless. The closest you can get is to an acceptance of being unaware of your ego. That's not a bad method of controlling your ego, but you cannot kill your ego without killing your self.

It just seems like this Article has too much mixed in from different philosophies and it hasn't been fully dissolved, but the colors run together nicely. Good job, OP.

wildtimes
Excellent post! Very well done.

I sure do hope you are (or will be) a parent. This is the stuff kids need to hear and know.

Bravo, OP.

Thank you and for the positive comments. I just don't want it to inflate my ego. I agree, this is something that is very important for children. I am a parent but recently divorced and remarried. Unfortunately my ex-wife has done a good job of isolating my son from me and I fear it will cause psychological damage to him. The situation is complicated and can't be discussed here. I have joint legal custody and court ordered visitation but she has worked her way around the law. However, the wonderful woman I married has a daughter who needs a father figure since her first dad passed so I put my efforts toward helping them.

Unity_99
People should be in good societies, we shouldn't have to reinvent the wheel a thousand times over, but progress as a whole with good and real breakthroughs being used by all.

There is a group of spiritually minded folk who assume that tangible things, medicines, equality and technology is all bad. That we're just supposed to float up and out as spirit. But in reality our spirits came here to grow up and the tangible is a part of the real lessons and real foundational concepts of infinity itself.

I agree with much of what you said. However, it is difficult to impossible for most or all people to break away from the society that seems to run this world. But as you said, compassion needs to be stirred in order to advance, in my view, not only as a society, but as individuals. There is nothing wrong with using the tools at hand provided by the society you are in to help yourself, family and friends. However, one should accept the responsibility for their own decisions including when something goes wrong if they make a poor choice. That was my point, not to avoid using the available technology or tools.

As far as using the things put here, I agree with you. These things can be abused and many of the solutions provided by nature are ignored and avoided by conventional medicine or food processing companies. I have done much study of plants and herbs and found many herbs to be very useful to prevent and cure disease. I still have much to learn there but that is a subject for another thread.

Your statement regarding the tangible being part of the lessons we learn reminded me of another point to life. We have many challenges in life. Those challenges can be looked at as an opportunity to grow and learn by enduring hardship or difficulties that come our way. However we cannot tell the exact reason we may have hardships or difficulties, we just need to do our best with them.

reply to post by GodIsRelative


I agree on the idea that you cannot kill your ego. All you can do is minimize any of its negative effect and be aware of it so you can know if it is pushing you to react in ways best avoided. I think of it as... I have a body, soul or spirit, mind, and ego. I consider my spirit or soul to be my true self. I consider my body to be controlled by my mind. I consider my mind to be a tool for my soul to use. However, I believe my mind is controlled through a combination of my ego and my soul. Therefore I want to bring my ego into alignment with my soul rather than the other way around. Many of my feelings come through my ego. So I try to use my heart to be my guide rather than my emotions and when I feel a negative emotion, to override that with a combination of logic and my code of ethics. However, if I feel the emotion of compassion, something I know is positive, I try to act positively on it.