What is the point of life? (Not in a cynical or philosophical way)

I am tired of asking myself every day the same thing: what is the point of this life? I do this since high school (currently 41 y/o); I remember myself sitting in the classroom, surrounded by screaming kids, and asking myself what I'm doing there. Or waking up in the morning and wondering why I have to go on another day. Why I cannot quit life just like I can quit a job, or a friend, or a class.
Since then I've done a lot of things, changed jobs, changed countries, made a family, raised two kids, divorced, tried some other relationships, tried a million of things in between, and yet nothing much changed inside. I still wake up in the morning asking myself what is the point of this life.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not whining. I was raised in a spartan way, and always told that a person should do what it has to do, like it or not. And this is the way I lived all my life, responsibilities first, pleasure after. It doesn't mean also I had no fun in my life, or I didn't experimented things. I'm not ungrateful for the good things I had or have in my life. Is just that they are not enough to give my life a lasting meaning. I do live this life in every way, but is not voluntarily.

Also I'm not asking this question in a suicidal manner, even if I considered suicide many times. I have two kids and an old mother who would be devastated for life if I'll do something like this ( my partner will survive it, I think ). But if, by miracle, I could have the choice to keep on living or to die tomorrow, without anyone suffering any hard consequences, I would choose, without hesitation, to die. In a heartbeat.

Maybe I'm depressed, which I find funny since I don't believe in depression. And I'm not ready to take some pills just to reinforce the illusion that my life has some meaning. I'll probably feel better, and do my tasks easier, and find the entertainment more entertaining, but the underlying meaning of my life will not change. And to be honest I've tried some natural cures for depression; it doesn't help. I feel like I'm trying to lie to myself.

So I'm asking you people, what is the point of life? Why we do everything that we during our lives, just to die in the end and lose everything? Nothing is lasting for us, not our love, nor our hates, not our career, not our family, not our possessions, nothing that we fight for in life. We will lose everything in one way or another, so why even trying? I don't really believe in god, or more exactly what I believe is that even if god exists, he doesn't give a crap about us and our lives. I tend to believe in reincarnation, but again, is just a theory. I brought nothing with me from a previous life to help me somehow, or to ease my actual life, so even if there is a next life, probably I will remember nothing from this one, total reset. I mean, god damn it, I'll have to start all this from the beginning, all over again, and this is even more depressing. Do you know Freddie Mercury's song "Who wants to live forever"? That's exactly the feeling. So no, not even reincarnation help me with this.

I'm just so incredibly tired of doing something that I want to quit for so long, and not having any idea for how long I'll have to keep doing it. I'm tired of living in my own skin, of being myself and carrying this burden all the time. I just want to rest, somewhere in the dark and silence, and not think about anything anymore. But I can't, so I'm still trying to find a way to keep going.

So really, what a person can do in a situation like this?

reply to post by WhiteHat

you are created by a god, your purpose is to love and praise your creator. anything else means to be cursed and damned.

First of all it sounds like you're really depressed.

Now as for the purpose of life, there is no way to know. You just have to do what comes before you and find happiness and satisfaction as best you can. I have basically felt the same way you describe for my whole life too. I'm now 27 with a wife of 7 years and a job that I hate. I rarely see much point in living (besides to be there for my wife) except that I am alive. I do not presuppose myself to be the master of my own life. I feel like whatever this life is, it is something that needs to happen and I have a responsibility to carry it out. "Do what comes in front of me."

I figure since I'm stuck here, I might as well make the most of it. Normally I'm pretty easy going, but overall my emotions are flat because I feel like everything is a game and everyone is pretending.

I'm going to a psychiatrist for the first time in my life in 1 week to try some anti-depressants. Not for me, but for my wife. I don't want to be so flat around her.

and if you dont believe in God then just work on loving other people how you would wish to be loved.

Thats not easy.

Originally posted by icepack
reply to post by WhiteHat

 

you are created by a god, your purpose is to love and praise your creator. anything else means to be cursed and damned.

Really? For all I know I was created by my parents, and I love them very much.
But let's consider this thing for a minute; what satisfaction can there be living for someone you never met, never see, never hear from, and is always better than you, so it doesn't really need anything from you? And all his satisfaction seems to result from holding your nuts in a tight fist?
Sorry, not buying it. I think god is perfectly fine with or without me and my life, and so far I managed pretty well also without him.

reply to post by WhiteHat



If you're like me at all, then you keep asking this question because you already know the answer, and you don't like it anymore than I do. lol

There is no reason.

Originally posted by Socrato
First of all it sounds like you're really depressed.

Now as for the purpose of life, there is no way to know. You just have to do what comes before you and find happiness and satisfaction as best you can. I have basically felt the same way you describe for my whole life too. I'm now 27 with a wife of 7 years and a job that I hate. I rarely see much point in living (besides to be there for my wife) except that I am alive. I do not presuppose myself to be the master of my own life. I feel like whatever this life is, it is something that needs to happen and I have a responsibility to carry it out. "Do what comes in front of me."

I figure since I'm stuck here, I might as well make the most of it. Normally I'm pretty easy going, but overall my emotions are flat because I feel like everything is a game and everyone is pretending.

I'm going to a psychiatrist for the first time in my life in 1 week to try some anti-depressants. Not for me, but for my wife. I don't want to be so flat around her.

This is how I live my life too, and try to make the best of it. But sometimes the feeling of "what's the point" is overwhelming.
Thanks for your reply, and let me know if those depressants help.

Originally posted by jiggerj
reply to post by WhiteHat

 

If you're like me at all, then you keep asking this question because you already know the answer, and you don't like it anymore than I do. lol

There is no reason.

You're so damn right, short and simple.
At least you made me laugh at it, thank you.

Originally posted by borntowatch
and if you dont believe in God then just work on loving other people how you would wish to be loved.

Thats not easy.

I love the people close to me even more than that. But I stay away from new people, I avoid making new relationships, I don't want to be disappointed again.

Originally posted by WhiteHat

Originally posted by icepack
reply to post by WhiteHat

 

you are created by a god, your purpose is to love and praise your creator. anything else means to be cursed and damned.

Really? For all I know I was created by my parents, and I love them very much.
But let's consider this thing for a minute; what satisfaction can there be living for someone you never met, never see, never hear from, and is always better than you, so it doesn't really need anything from you? And all his satisfaction seems to result from holding your nuts in a tight fist?
Sorry, not buying it. I think god is perfectly fine with or without me and my life, and so far I managed pretty well also without him.

edit on 14-10-2012 by WhiteHat because: (no reason given)

if you love life, you love god. if you serve the creation, you serve god. your parents are not your creators, they themself are created, they are witnesses of creation. if you respect and love the creation, you love the creator. the goal is, every human exists in a loving relationship to god.

That's an excellent question and one that people ponder sometimes their entire lives. I suppose all one can do is speculate. Perhaps the answer isn't for us to know here and now. I do know that there is far more to life than just this physical body as I had an out of body experience many years ago. I know that sounds crazy and it's ok if you don't believe it. In any case, that has left me open minded and open to possibilities.

Sometimes I think that if it is natural to be born, then it is natural die. It is a process we go through. We are all made of enery and energy does not die. Strange that as human beings we are not even sure of our purpose. Perhaps we come here to learn and experience and when we die we go on to something better. I am not religeous but pretty much believe that there is a greater power out there. Some my say God, Allah, Buddah or whatever, but we all come from the same source.

With life being so profound on so many levels, there must be a reason. I just don't think that people have the answer. I have mild depression and anxiety so it isn't easy for me either. I just try to live my life with love, compassion and laghter and try to be the best person that I can be. All else will hopefully fall into place someday.

reply to post by Night Star


Thank you for your great reply.
Maybe this is why I can't just give up and let it be. The feeling that there must be a purpose. There must be something greater in this life. But then, why I can't find it?
I think that I'm open minded too. Yet I'm so tired of searching for an answer.

reply to post by WhiteHat

Life is meaningless.
Nothing matters.

Regardless of the journey to get there, everyone's story ends the exact same way.

Most of what you want, you will never receive.
All that you have, will eventually be gone.
All memories of you, will eventually be forgotten.

All that you are made of, will eventually decay and rot, and will mix back in with the dirt from which it originated.

Originally posted by icepack

 

you are created by a god, your purpose is to love and praise your creator. anything else means to be cursed and damned.

or in other words:
[color=FF996E]Shut Up! & Obey!!
Question Nothing.
Believe what you are told to believe.
Do what you are told to do.

Wow, I related very much to your post, at times I have felt much the same.

I can only speak for myself personally, I feel that our lives only have the meaning/purpose that we give them. For instance, one person may feel that they are here to be a parent and so that is their meaning, maybe another feels that they are here to be a doctor or to try to find cures to diseases and so on.

Many times in my darkest days I have had to tell myself that I am only here to survive. That all I have to do is keep breathing until one day, I stop. Sometimes I have to take it minute my minute because a day seems much too long.

I am glad to read that you are not suicidal. If you ever are, I would encourage that you speak with someone that can help you, of course.

I hope you find some peace here.

reply to post by BrokenCircles

or in other words: Shut Up! & Obey!! Question Nothing. Believe what you are told to believe. Do what you are told to do

not really. if you see injustice or wrong things, you have to fight them to respect and serve the creation. to correct the wrong and evil is a duty for those who serve god.

reply to post by WhiteHat


You have the power to create, since you have a family, you have the power to change any circumstance in your life, be creative, start new projects together with the people you love most, never give up, life is a fight, you are a warrior with never-ending potential, change your job, start studying some topic you are most interested in, never give up, you need to transmit the love for life to your children, empower and help them to be great seekers and compassionate powerful fighters, nothing can stop you being creative! You have a purpose, every single atom in this vast universe has a purpose and there is no greater or lesser for the matter.

If you do not like the circumstances in your life change them, if you cannot change them, change your point of view! The only remedy is your own strong will!

Happiness (the purpose of life) is not a point of arrival, but the journey itself!

reply to post by starseedflower


I'm still thinking about what you're telling me. You seem so sure of yourself, while for me, please don't take offense, your words are kind of empty. Happiness is so elusive and has so many meanings for each of us; temporary joy or pleasure, love, affection is what I know, I've met them many times. But happiness, as such, without any strings attached I don't think I ever felt in my life.
Thanks for your reply.
As I said, I'm thinking about it.

Generally speaking, I share much of your sentiment. Not that I don't want to live. However, I sincerely wish I had never existed; never even been conceived.

With regards to purpose, I feel that if the world was a simulation with no other human, I would say our purpose was to experience life and the world around us. In many ways, that becomes part of a personal purpose.

If destiny exists, a persons purpose may be grand or mundane. Your purpose may be to lead a rebellion to free a people, or it may be something as trivial as being the guy who gets the last seat on the plane which delays the next passenger who, because of the delay, has a chain of events leading to him saving the lives of a group of people. If that is the case, I think it would make life easier if we would get a little heads up to our minor role in the big play.

However, as we are a collective of humans, I believe that the purpose of life is more collective in nature. What is our purpose as the most intelligent species on the planet? I think this plays into your philosophy of responsibility before personal pleasure. In that way, our purpose is to improve the world and ourselves, increasing our abilities, efficiencies, liberty and happiness. It's a tall order, and one I think we have failed at. (ETA: I also think there is no hope for recovery to that path, but we are instead in a death spiral for the species and the planet.) If the world were operating in a noble and prograssive manner, the insignificance or troubles of one's individual life might be grim and depressing, but combining such a life with the global failure of mankind, life becomes downright devastating.

At this point, I think you and I are doing what we can. Meet your responsibilities, don't try to cause pain or problems to others, and try to find some joy in the little things.

I guess we make of life what we can. I'm pretty sure we're meant to persevere through all the obstacles, that it is a kind of spiritual growth. I am not religious, but I feel deep down that there is a higher purpose, and must have at least something to do with perseverance.

I’ve also thought about it since I was in school. It seems like a simple and important question that should have an answer waiting to be found somewhere. Maybe we understand it better after our time is done.