They're cutting his brain in half! [LEWC]

My breath caught in my throat as I looked out of the airplane window at the blanket of dark clouds below. “I have to get there before the surgery,” I thought. “It may be the last time that I see my son alive.”

Only a parent knows the palpable weight that presses on your chest when you ponder the uncertain fate of your child. Mine had epilepsy. For most of his life, he was plagued by uncontrolled, violent, sudden seizures. They happened at the grocery store, at the mall, on hockey ice. Once, he started seizing on a plane trip to Alaska. When someone quoted a Bible verse about a boy being “thrown to the ground by a demon” I knew that I had witnessed it firsthand.

You could say that, after twenty years of doctor visits, therapies, drug trials and trips to the ER, I was accustomed to the unexpected. But, this was different. They were going to cut his brain in half – sever the corpus callosum – in an attempt to control the seizures. The drugs had failed. The diets had failed. The prayers, the natural remedies and the Vagal nerve stimulator had failed. The only recourse was this barbaric procedure.

The projected results of the surgery were vague. He might live or he might just as easily die. His personality could be forever altered. He could lose all coordination. Or, by some miracle, the bright, happy young man that I once knew might suddenly return, well and whole.

The voice on the intercom jolted me into the present, “Ladies and gentlemen, this is the captain. Due to the weather we expect a brief arrival delay…”

“No, no, no!” my mind reeled. “This can’t happen. I have to see him before the operation, hold his hand, tell him that I love him…” Like avid sports fans who paint their faces, wave banners and jump up and down in support of their teams, I believed that my mere presence would somehow affect the outcome.

At last, the flight touched down, an hour behind schedule. I raced through the rental car lot, drove like a maniac and then clopped my way up the hospital sidewalk. The words on the hospital directory swam before my eyes. “Where is it? Where is it? Ah, yes, there! Inpatient surgery – G7.” The sweat dripped down the back of my neck as I counted each floor in the elevator.

The waiting room was huge, full of families, patients, friends, all huddled together and trying to get comfortable on vinyl orange couches. I searched the sea of faces and suddenly, there he was. He saw me and his eyes lit up. I would never be the same, again.

I don’t know if my being there had an impact on the procedure’s outcome. They said it went well. He suffered no adverse effects except a massive lingering headache, and the seizures actually abated for a time. But, I do know this: when you’re staring at the end of your life or a loved one’s life, you realize that love is the only thing that matters – not your plans, your work, your bank account – just the love in your heart. And, the world is a different color after that.

Deep stuff! I liked reading it a lot. Stuff like that is hard to share... so thanks for sharing it with us!! S&F

reply to post by Kangaruex4Ewe


Thank you, Kangaruex! (Sounds like a good name for a Dr. Seuss book.)

I appreciate your comments, and BTW, I enjoy your funny pictures on my favorite thread.

That was a really good read. I got a little emotional about it and that pouched hopper is right, it's hard to share a story like that. Also, awesome avatar think it may be my favorite here.

reply to post by graceunderpressure


S&F.

I have to say this contest is really bringing out the best in all involved so far, something I was not expecting. Your read was very heartfelt. Reading it, I feel as though the problems as a parent I face are nothing by comparison.

I wish you the best, and a very good read.

Originally posted by graceunderpressure
reply to post by Kangaruex4Ewe

 

Thank you, Kangaruex! (Sounds like a good name for a Dr. Seuss book.)

I appreciate your comments, and BTW, I enjoy your funny pictures on my favorite thread.

Shucks.... The feeling is mutual.

reply to post by graceunderpressure


Well done. SnF. Thanks for sharing that story with us.

It's rough, being a parent, sometimes, but you sound like a very good one!

Originally posted by Domo1
That was a really good read. I got a little emotional about it and that pouched hopper is right, it's hard to share a story like that. Also, awesome avatar think it may be my favorite here.

Thank you, Domo. It's nice to have a venue such as this one where I can pour out my soul amongst friends, be they pouched hoppers or joker cats. I always liked your avatar, too. It's the perfect ATS mix of cute and disturbing.

Originally posted by 74Templar
reply to post by graceunderpressure

 

I have to say this contest is really bringing out the best in all involved so far, something I was not expecting. Your read was very heartfelt. Reading it, I feel as though the problems as a parent I face are nothing by comparison.

I wish you the best, and a very good read.

Templar, thank you for your kind words and wishes. Every parent's job is challenging. I have a friend whose son was recently sent to prison for a terrible crime that he absolutely did not commit. When I look at what their family is going through, I feel like my family had it easy.

reply to post by graceunderpressure

Whew! As I'm not a fan of horror, I almost did not click on your story because of its title.

I wish more was understood about epilepsy and its trigger mechanisms. I found it easy to put myself in your place, even though the various situations involving my own children were different. Such is the world of being a caring parent. Well done.

Originally posted by 74Templar
I have to say this contest is really bringing out the best in all involved so far, something I was not expecting.

Yes. It most certainly has. to all who have shared their life experiences thus far.

Your read was very heartfelt. Reading it, I feel as though the problems as a parent I face are nothing by comparison.

Agreed. We've raised two girls and Tha Boi with nothing mOar than a few stitches, strains, sprains, braces [dental] and the like. No 'major' medical problems whatsoever. My heart, too, goes out to those faced with far worse, even life-threatening, issues.

My thoughts are it will prove extremely difficult to choose a 'single winner' in this particular contest .... just too many wonderfully beautiful, sad and memorable experiences being shared throughout.

You rock ATS Members.

reply to post by graceunderpressure


I'm a nurse who has spent many years in a neurosurgical ICU. I've seen this surgery and it was worked wonders in children who suffer from seizures, often with no deficits or problems in personality at all! Good luck!

reply to post by graceunderpressure


S&F

This was very good. Heartbreaking, but excellent.

Originally posted by aboutface
reply to post by graceunderpressure

 

Whew! As I'm not a fan of horror, I almost did not click on your story because of its title.

About, thank you. And, I apologize for the sensationalist title. I figured that a more subtle line might be drowned in the ATS sea of "End of the world" and "Nuclear bomb at the Olympics" threads.

I appreciate everyone's kind words and wishes.