Rudeness is a part of life

hi ats this is my first thread ..and its a rant (sorry) ..it was a situation i've been on the receiving end of before and want some opinions

Why is it acceptable to abuse and scream at a person because they work over a counter?

i was in a Q in a store where a customer was verbally abusing the member of staff because of a previously bought 3 month old broken item costing £500..the actual complainer was responsible for the damage from what i heard and refused to 'pay' to have it repaired, while this guy was pointing and waving his arms and getting increasingly angrier the shop assistant (keeping calm as he could) kept saying 'sorry' and 'ill do all i can' even tho it was not the stores fault and the guy was being pretty harsh and intimidating.

the complainer then continued to verbally harass the assistant until the assistant couldn't find a reply and other staff and manager were on hand to be screamed at aswell ...while i was getting uneasy in the situation in the Q the lady next to me said 'its disgraceful how they wont help that man and the store should be ashamed'...even tho it was clearly the customers fault he broke his item and who was now throwing it up and down the counter at staff shouting 'fix it'.....'you have no insurance and physical damage isn't covered by the warranty ' .. said the store manager to which the guy then started telling people in the Q 'they shouldn't shop her its a con' ..after a few rants he left with a number and address to complain to.

the thing that has made me rage the most is why everyone in the Q felt the need to HUFF and SIGH and agree with the guy who was clearly wrong.....

.is society that wrong and human nature that damaged that is acceptable to take your problems and stress out on a kid working in a shop?

would the complainer enjoy that situation if it happened in his work place?




( i've been the kid in that type of shop before and wont mention what type of retail shop because its deemed accepted behavior in them and attitudes change when its revealed.. some people are arrogant and extremely out of touch with how to hold normal civilized conversations )

reply to post by DukeEligos


I live in Seattle, WA and if a customer acted like the one you have told us about.....that person would be thrown out of the store and not allowed to shop there any more.

reply to post by caladonea


its a strange thing here in the uk it happens all the time from the smaller shops to giant retail chains....its a 2 or 3 times daily situation ..sometimes the same people returning everyday for a week to continue the argument

Wow! Poor kid. I have been in his shoes many times before. Not only do you have to worry about the customers giving you grief, you have to worry about whether you have handled the situation correctly in the eyes of the management. You know what they say, nobody is irreplaceable. Being a manager now, there is no way that I would allow a customer to victimize one of my employees. I would step in and handle it myself. That is why I get paid more, because I have enough experience under my belt to make things run smoothly.

We are never going to be free of jerks like the customer you mentioned, but hopefully the employees have management backing and should all have training in exactly what to do in such a situation per the employers policies.

I agree there is a lack of respect for others today and have tried to teach my children that being kind will get you a lot further than being an ass. And it will probably keep that fast food cook from spitting on your food.

If you are reading this and are an employer, please take the time to school your employees on what your policies are in a situation like this. And let them know that you have their back. Oh and also, get rid of your rude employees. They suck and lose you business.

Rudeness and flying off the handle have become standard behavior in public these days. It is unfortunately part of working with the public that the employees must put up with some truly awful people. I used to work as a welfare case worker, so I got my share being cussed at and treated terribly by people who were demanding free money.

Typically I would try to be calm and make things right, but when people would get really rude and crazy, I would cut them off and tell them that I would be happy to hear them out, and try to fix the problem, but if they were going to continue to yell at me and insult me, I wasn't going to stand for it.

I remember telling one lady who was cussing me out that, if she didn't calm down and speak to me properly, I was going to terminate the conversation and walk away from her. When she sputtered and said that I had to take her crap, I told her that the state didn't pay me enough to be insulted in such a manner, and she could either behave or be left there standing like a dummy. She threatened to tell my supervisor. I told her to go for it, and while she was at it, go ahead and tell my supervisor the exact curse words she used to describe me.

Sometimes rude, ridiculous people will keep on dishing it out, assuming that paid employees "have to take it", until somebody stands up to them and lets them know that there is a right way to get your problems resolved, and rude behavior will not be tolerated.

Customer service is an art, one that should be taught to every employee who has to deal with the public. As far as the dummies in line (or the que, as you say in the UK) who thought that boorish crybaby was correct, it is a sad commentary on how low people have sunk in regards to what is considered proper public behavior.

Rudeness should not have to be a part of life. I haven't seen much of it at all since I moved out to west Texas. It's a little more old-fashioned out here, and not really tolerated in these small towns...Thank God!

When I have a complaint, regardless of how frustrated I am, I always try to be respectful of the person who is trying to help me. Sure, I want to scream and rant sometimes, but it really accomplishes nothing but makes the person look like a jerk.

You see one of the things missing in the modern age is a small thing.

It's called common courtesy.

it's just two tiny little words that have a lot of meaning to other people.

It means don't be a jerk to people and treat them with respect. Such as opening a door for a lady and calling someone ma'am, miss, or sir.

It also means helping someone if they're having a bit of trouble with something and not accepting a reward other than a thank you for it.

This concept has been lost because many parents these days believe that a child must be utterly spoiled and never a harsh word be said of them. For many children, when they're spoiled they always think the world owes them a living and revolves around them so they don't have to respect people. And that's a sad thing in this day and age and will only hurt America in the long run.

I would love to see the return of common courtesy myself.

It also means if you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all.

I think it's mainly due to the lack of MEN to punch douchebags like that in the face. That's what used to happen. Today you would be arrested for assault, sued, etc.

This is why everyone should be packing heat. Guns don't kill people. I do.

People behind counters are rude people too. They're not two different kinds of people. But I understand your rant.

I was in Matalan the other day and the guy serving asked if I had a store card. I said no, so he handed me the form to fill in and started searching for a pen.
I asked if I have to have a Matalan card to buy the little bundle of kids clothes I had and he looked down his snotty nose and spat out NO at me, and was clearly very annoyed. So I said I wouldn't bother filling out their form then, I'll just pay for these items, (if that's okay?) and explained I used to have a card but dunno what happened to it and I'm not in that town to shop very often so it's no big deal, and I smiled at him in a chatty friendly way. After that his face was really tripping him, so I said to myself internally, and not out loud, -I don't come in here because the staff are miserable bastards. Then I smiled even more at my evil thoughts. Then I paid for my stuff and left.

I wont go back there either. Rude tosser.