My "awakening"....

I am not sure that what I am about to post should be in this forum. Maybe it would be better suited for the short stories forum and if moderators think so then please move. I posted here because I think this has much to do with philosophical and metaphysical ideas.


I am about to describe my "awakening". I do not call it that because I claim to know everything....I DO NOT....
When I say..."my awakening" I mean the moment in which I shed the old skin of my old thoughts and began to rediscover my inner-self. Since then it has been a learning process and will continue to be as such until I am no longer in this body.

O.K. This all happened when I was 17 years old. (I am 26 at this time)
My brother (who was 15 at the time) and I were having a conversation, like we always seemed to be, about many things....Just contemplating reality, the world around us, the possibilities that exist, those type things. I was doing most the talking...I was doing most of the talking on this particular night.
We were sitting outside on a warm summer night...the moon was bright and nearly full. I remember it all like it was yesterday. We were just discussing things and embracing this chance to be alive.

This went on for a few hours....Then suddenly out of nowhere something happened. Something profound. Something life changing.
I said something....and to this day I don't know what it was exactly....and my brother stood up with this look in his eyes that I had never seen before. I looked at him and for a split second I wanted to say "what is wrong with you" but then suddenly the energy took me over as well.
At this exact moment I had an outer body experience....but not alone...my brother also experienced this. We both exited our worldly bodies. It was as if something pulled my spirit out of my body.
I could see my "worldly body" still sitting in my chair on the ground and I could see my brother's worldly body as well, standing on the ground....but we were in the air....That is the best way I can describe it. We felt as if we were about 50 ft or so off the ground looking down on ourselves.
Not only that though. I could perceive my brother's spirit beside me in the air....Not see him....but feel him...Like we had become one. That type of thing....Like I said, it is very hard to put such a thing into words.
This lasted what seemed to be only a brief moment.
And as suddenly as it began it ended....we were both back in our bodies. This, however, is not the end of this story...it is merely the beginning.

At the very moment we both re-entered our bodies something profound happened. We both began to weep like babies. Uncontrollably even. But not from sadness....It was not that type of weeping. It was something else.
There was an energy around us both. We were sharing this moment in a way that I will not even try to put words to.
It is what happened after this that I wanted to share.

We shared this moment and for about 30 minutes or so the weeping continued....we embraced this moment without fully realizing its impact at the time. After we were able to speak and discuss this again we began to try to rationalize what just happened. But something happened inside me....and inside him....It was like an entire database of knowledge....Well I hate to call it knowledge because that implies I think I know things I don't....
Let's call it ideas...An entire world of ideas were suddenly inside us both....Things we had never even consciously thought of. Thoughts I had never entertained before. It was as if I had been "born again".

Neither of us sleep for many hours after this happened...our minds racing. I felt alive for the first time in my life and suddenly I seen the world in a very different way. I could suddenly see all the lies and all the beauty of certain things all at once. Suddenly I knew I was being lied to and manipulated. Now you have to understand....this is not something I had thought of much before this "awakening".
It was like suddenly the veil was pulled back and I was seeing things through a different set of eyes and the same can be said about my brother. For a while afterwords....after we did actually sleep...we did not share thoughts. We were trying to figure it out on our own I guess. But when we did actually sit down and talk about it our thoughts were very much in line.

I felt like I could suddenly see things I had never seen before. I would start speaking and things would come out of my mouth, from my subconscious I suppose, that I had never consciously thought before. We would be having a philosophical discussion and I would say something and then after I would say it I would hear what I had just said and think...."wait, where did that come from" and "man, that really makes a whole lot of sense and rings so true".
We both suddenly had this urge to absorb any information we could. I had this urge to learn things and to find truths that I had never even thought about searching for before the "awakening".


I could go on and on trying to describe this thing but in the end I will just end up talking in circles because words simply cannot describe it to me. It has stayed with me and is as profound today as it was the night it happened. It still gives me goose-bumps and makes my hair stand on end to think about it. It makes my brain pulsate....(in a very good way) My brother still feels the same way about that night as well and has been a "sponge" ever since as well. When we are around eachother which is not as much now ("real world" priorities take up much of our time now) but when we are we share ideas and thoughts constantly. We never cease to try to learn new things....

Now what do I think about all that? Well I think that in a way I reconnected with something inside me that knows the truth. Not that I have completely found that but I am still trying and that is all that matters...IMO....
I think that the truth is something that is inside us all. Something we do not need to be taught. We merely need to open our eyes and see that there is a divide between body and spirit and therein lies our problems. We are taught that this world is all there is...by society...that we should just try to be happy because this is it. (Of course some are not taught that...I am just referring to the lies they train us to believe in)
Some even try to say they have the truth and they can show it to you. I just do not think I need anyone else to show me the truth because I have always known the truth. I feel that way because of my "awakening". I learned so much in that one split second....Like I said it is hard to put into words....But hey I'm trying

What do other members think of such a thing? Has anyone had a similar experience? I would love to hear about it if you would want to share it.....



(I hope this post comes off making sense....if not fully at least somewhat....I welcome any and all questions about my experience.)
Oh and if you made it this far....thanks for reading....

Peace and love to everyone......

S&F. That is an amazing story! You and your brother could make one heck of a book with that story! I hope to one day feel what it is you two felt. I sm reading a book now called "I Am" by Howard Falco in which he describes his moment of truth as the top of his head opening up and allowing all sorts of information to pour into him while in a blissful state. He said he couldn't even write it all down it was so much information. Sounds a lot lime what you experienced. The simultaneous out of body experience is something I have never heard though. That is very unusual and amazing. I'm happy for you all!

Amazing story...
here is my:

Short after it i decided to make a second trip (i was on a world trip short before) to switzerland visiting a friends grave and make a pilgrim to Sitten, a little village called "Sion" before .... (My swiss friend stated this pilgrim is his last will for me...). When there i went into a priory and had a night long talk with the prior...

After that he invited me to have a meditation session in a cristalcave on the near mountain (what was normally only allowed for the monks but i thought my friend has made the ways for me...) I did. And it was the most sacred moment i have had (til now!). First it was a very amazing place. Crystals all over the cave and a view over the mountainworld of Jura. There was a little shrine in the back and a place to sit in front of it. Candles all around, a small fire place and firewood. First day was more about exitement about this ""find" and i wasn´t able to get the concentration to come into a meditative state as usual.
But early in the morning a monk came in and brought me some food and fresh water. I asked him if he did this here and if he has tips for me. He just grinned and went away. I was confused... The second day i started to meditate, viewing to the shrine. It was just normal as everytime and as i had no instructions i did it as usual. Concentrating on a certain symbol or point to get the full focuss on it. But nothing special happened...
I started over and over again but no efforts... (As i am not religious i felt a bit uncomfortable with the shrine, anyway...) Next day the monk plus another one came again and brought me more food than the day before and more fresh water. I told him about my disbelief in christian symbols and asked him again if he had some tip for me. This time he talked: "First, all the christian symbolics represent a knowlege that is far beyond of what you are thinking they are. And second, don´t focuss on the shrine. It is your backing. Expand your view. Expand your conciousness to everything that is..." Then he went away, grinning. Okay, i would give it a try. I turned around to the opening of the cave and this time i blended out all the symbols and else...
I expanded my consious mind from a little point of concentration to my body (did that before, tho it was merely easy), then i expanded it to the crystal cave. I felt a resonance i never felt before. It was a special kind of vibrating and i had a vision of a few, maybe a hundred monks that where doing the same as i did. Most of them seemed to have same visons like i had in this very moment but i felt that they have failed. But there where two that where other. i felt a kind of happyness and light streaming through them and after they had this they, where jumping up and where running down the mountain. Happy. I tried to focuss on their happenings but it vanished few times, when i tried. Tho i had a hint. There was something to them i had to figure out. I slept in. Next day i woke up early (as usual with the first sunrays) and i thought i got it. I ate a bit of bread and and started to meditate. I quickly came to the situation from the day before and i tried to enter the akasha chronicles (did it before) for this place, but shortly i noticed it was a dead end. Tho after a quick lunch i started again at the point of expanding my view. my conciousness embodied my body then the cave. The i expanded to the mountain i was in. i saw the world around like i am the mountain itself! and then i came quick. I embodied the whole viewing field, the whole countryside the whole continent the whole earth, the moon, the other planets, the whole solar system, galaxy, all the other ones, the whole! I was one with everything! I was happy! I was ... LOVE!
It stayed for a moment and then it went in reverse, but like i was seeing it starting from the beginning to today! Wow! It was amazing! I just wanted to run down to the prior and tell him everything i undergone but there was a stopping feeling inside i couldn´t explain. So i followed it. I drank a tea and tried to understand what i just have expirienced but it was too much. I felt asleep. I think i have slept for a whole day, when i was waked up by the monk. I tried to explain to him what i have encountered but i couldnt describe it well. But he just grinned and said: "Now you have to let your ego go! You have entered the one. You know how it goes. You are very talented. my prior said it to me, you will be different. yes you are! Go on. do the next!" And i did. err... i just see i have not enough space to desribe it in one post tho i try to shorten it...
The next day i didnt do anything as i had to figure out what just was happening to me. I felt connected to this supreme source, i felt connected to everything around me and much more i felt... the energies flowing! ( Kinda like neo in matrix at the one scene!) I... no there was no i anymore! I couldnt remember anything out of my life, but it was irrelevant i was one with everything! No i just was!
Well to make it short in the next two days i was going through a transcendention of myself. I felt i wasnt I anymore i was more my higher self that started to create a new ego for me. This is now what I am. Memorys came back but they aren´t important for me anymore (more for others to have something to tell to them). ...

reply to post by Subconsciously Correct


Thanks for the reply...It was indeed a pivotal moment in both our lives and neither of us have been what we were before that moment since then.
Thanks as well for mentioning that book....I am curious now and will have to read it.

reply to post by JimIrie


Thank you for sharing that story....
You mentioned something about sleeping for many hours after you had an experience and I can relate to that. I did the same...Though it may have been because I had not slept at all for many hours, after I finally "came down" off the "high"...."cloud 9" that I was on because of our experience I was very tired. Like the body just needed rest.

I also shared the experience of feeling "as one" with everything. I suddenly realized I am merely a single grain of sand on this infinite beach that is everything. All at once. It wasn't something that took years to realize. It just was!
It was beautiful and wonderful....
I struggle with ego...wrestle with it to this day...but I think the most important part is to understand that battle. Being able to step outside myself and know that I am wrestling with ego is very important for me. It keeps me humble if nothing else.

Thank you again.....great story btw...

reply to post by Jakal26


Thanks for the thanks.
This happened to me when i was 19. I am into all this spiritual/occult stuff since my very early childhood and i was practising OBE astral travel and meditation since i am eight...
After i have done some bad things in my early teens i knew that i had to rework my "karma" (i dont like this word...)
and then i could go on...
As this happened when i was eighteen i knew that soon i would go on...
This happened inside this cave.
Now i am 24.
The ego thing was very hard...
If it helps think about the pheonix from the ashes legend. It is an analogy for this very issue! let the ego die and get reborn in the state of the higher i...
The indian shamans called it, "to walk along the great eagle (right to left wing) without getting eaten by him"...
It is all the same.
Maybe if it helps read my thread series down in my sig...
part two should be something for you...

Oh and btw, i cannot see why this is in the gray area? It should be in the metaphysics forum!

Peace, love and light,
let u guide by higher i

Jim

reply to post by JimIrie


I thought it should be in the metaphysics forum as well but I guess maybe I shouldn't have said anything at the top of the post. Maybe it was moved before it was read. I don't know.....Oh well

The things you mentioned are very interesting to me. I have recently been learning more and more about astral projection and am at this time attempting to have a "mutual dream" with a friend that I recently met online. I have never met this person in the "real world" but am hoping that we can both project ourselves into a dream at the same time and be conscious inside that dream. I am not sure what we will do there. We are first just going to attempt to meet up inside this dream and remember it when we wake up from it.

Also....you mentioned your attempt to "rework" your karma because of things you done in your teens. I am in a similar position and have done some things that I think may have projected some bad karma. I am hoping that by being selfless and doing what I feel I am destined to do in this life at this time I can balance that out if nothing else.

I have thought of the phoenix many times before and it does help sometimes.
I have experienced "ego death" at points in my life but have began to think that though I must rise above ego I sort of need it as well. Though that is a whole different topic in itself I suppose.
I feel that we may share a common bond on many fronts here.

Oh....and I will be reading your threads btw. Thank you my friend.

reply to post by Jakal26


mutual dreams are fun! I done this a few times... mostly with one good friend and with two of my past girls (the ones that came so far)... I am sure you know a littlebit about this... so you surely know that you need a prebuilt dreamlevel that both should know... (think of it like the net... this level would be a html code and then the thing both dreamers need is the domain name) You will need to make a entrance for it with a sign on it (www.xyz.com?)
thats is the easiest way to do it... But surely you could do an OBE and enter another ones dream...
I did this sometimes with my past girls when i was on the road... They always told me on the phone that they have had a ...nice dream, with me inside...

For the karma thing... well, only to live a peaceful and selfless life wont bring anything... (Hello EGO !) Sure you may have learned your quest.
But to "rework" it you have to get ready to get back what you have once done and let it unfold...
And this is very hard....
But i would assume if you are so far that you can do this by will you are strong enough to endure it...
Most spirits aren´t ready for it and fail! (this ones got help from outside!)
I for myself have lost everything! My love, my baby, my family, everything materialistic i had... everything!
All i had afterwards was me, naked - if you want to use this pic...

reply to post by Jakal26


That is one of the most amazing experiences I've ever read. Beautiful really. Lucky you.

reply to post by JimIrie


Thank you for the info about the mutual dreams....I have not looked much into them until she brought it up the other night and have never attempted such a thing but I know it is possible. The hint about creating a type of dream landscape will be very helpful I think.....
I do not intent to attempt to try to enter her dreams or her enter mind....We are trying to meet up in a dream and remember what happens and be able to control what happens in that dream together...just as we would if we met up in "real" life.

I do not quite understand what you are saying about living a life of selflessness not being able to bring anything. I do not know that I personally want anything......What I mean is I am not looking to help myself....Not even in the next world....That will come as it comes and is what it is. (And about the peace part....I never really said peace...sometimes it takes something else) I do not understand how ego plays a role in all that. I am not trying to rise above anything or "obtain" any "redemption" or "salvation".....I don't even believe in salvation....redemption...ummm....yeah...that I have experienced. But not salvation...That is something I have no need for. Please elaborate on that if you will....
Also if you would....elaborate on what you mean by to "rework" it one must get back to what they have done and let it unfold. I am not understanding exactly what you are saying and do not wish to misinterpret by replying to something I don't quite understand yet. But I am interested in what you mean by that.

I am sorry to hear you have lost so much in your life my friend.....I too have lost many things....my wife was killed...my family is...well....I will not elaborate on it......but I have never lost a baby and I cannot imagine how horrible that most be....
I too have lost everything materialistic but not because I "lost" those things.....I gave those things up in search of better things. I choose to separate myself as much as possible from the falsities of this world because I feel it makes me a better person...Maybe not on the physical level but it makes me whole on the inside and that is all that matters. Just as being selfless does the same....If none of that is enough then so be it and I will take what is coming to me with open arms with a smirk on my face holding contempt for that which I feel lacks a fundamental understanding of me. (If such a thing exists....I don't know....Cannot be sure)

reply to post by Jakal26


Hey mate,

Wonderful..wonderful story!

I can relate, feeling of ecstasy, weeping, sudden rush of knowledge.. mostly knowledge about the real world around us.. looking past the lies.

I was was once racist, warmonger, hate loving child and i have grown into complete opposite and i try to care as much as i can for the fellow man and our earth

Best Wishes for you and your bro!

reply to post by Jakal26


Ha! your last post proves that you are till living your ego... (re:hello EGO!)

Well this is a topic i don´t want to and cannot explain in public... please understand that.

For the dream issue, i can tell you alot about this... I´ve mastered it all. It seems to me it was quite easy to do...
But first read my series and write me an u2u if you are interested in this stuff. i feel that you can get to the next level but again.. . i am not able to talk about this in public at the moment...

Peace, love and light,
let u guide by higher i

Jim

reply to post by AlphaANDOmega


Indeed wonderful!

What have you to provide? you seem to get a 180°
So you must have a wonderfull story! What has driven you to do it?
I think you should work this out for all the people outthere that where that same!
Make it a big story! i would like to help you on this if you want!
Could be a bestseller book!
I am a writer and also ghostwriting for some, now famous people!
u2u me i you like!

reply to post by JimIrie


Wow! Talk about talking in circles....I ask you a simple question with a simple answer and you answer with something like...."Your last post proves that you are still living in ego.....Well by that post the same can be said friend. Such judgement can only can from such a thing. So does such a thing as "I've mastered it all" when referring to the dreams.....Umm....Sorry probably not...."He he thinks himself a master is still a student"....

I will still read your series and see what I think.....I am just always weary of anyone who says..."please understand I cannot talk about this in public at the moment"....Why is that? Are you afraid someone will pick it apart and find the lies within what you are to say? (Not saying that is the case...just saying it makes me weary of you) The truth does not need to be hidden behind u2u's and the like. It should be free information....It should be allowed to be scrutinized so that others may come to the conclusion that it is the truth.

I mean no offense and am just stating my opinion....but you come off to be very elitist with that post and that is what I said what I said here.

Please elaborate to some extent or understand I will only see what you are saying as something based in ulterior motives. To say I am living in ego but you have....what...transcended it, do not experience it, and are beyond it is naive at best. Is it because I said we need ego? Really? If that is the case then I guess we just have a fundamental difference in prospective and that is ok....But to come out laughing and appear to act above another because of difference in such opinions.......
I just don't know about one who would do that.....
Just sayin....

Peace and love,
Jason

reply to post by Jakal26


S&F
My experience happened much more recently(july) and can related to most all you said. Except I was alone and don't remember seeing myself from above(obx). I can definitely relate to still struggling with my ego as it was pretty massive before hand, even though I had little in the way of what the tax man would consider material possessions.
I felt like a freakin x-man for the next few days afterwards

reply to post by Jakal26


sorry, but you have misunderstood my last post a little.
And i apologize for it if it sounded "elitist"
I am surely the last one who would think so...
I have really no bad or selfish intentions to do anything like that, i just wanted to point out that your sentence was truly a an oppression of the ego. not less and not more...

well for the dream issue.. i have told you that i have started this stuff in my early childhood... i came trough the different levels of achieving the dreambody. I am able to have lucid dreams anytime i want, i am able to get out of my body with the dreambody (not the same as astralbody), i can travel through different dream planes by will and alos know how to move from one to t the next stage. By the time i learned many things in there. I am able to create my own dream landscapes and can even go into another ones dreams...
So to say, i am able to control my dreams to the fullest... Thats what i have ment with mastering my dreams... I surely know that this doesnt mean that i am the master of dreaming and i surely don want any titles, like that...
If you would know me in real life you would know what i mean...

and i don´t want to talk in public about differnt special things ´cause some are private (for me and for you) and some things i cannot speak of because i would harm myself if anyone would do bad things with it or get harmed by what i told in public...
Also everything i am writing is everytime honest and (at least for my point of view) understandable and true...
I am only here to help others out, but again i don´t want to stock up more bad karma than i once had... can you understand that?

And for the ego issue.
surly do you need some kind of I identification at this level... but when you realize that it is an illusion you dont need it anymore. you get acces to your subconciousness and be one with the higher self...
Now you have three choices...
To stay in your alter ego, to embody the higher self or to create a new i perception with the aspects of this oneness witht the higher self...
I did the last choice, what is for me at the moment a kind of compromise, as i am living in the society at the moment...
I apologize once again if you have got the feeling that i have laughed at you or anyone at this point of view... This was surely not my intention...

Oh and i am quite sure that you will see my true intention by reading my thread series...

Peace, love and light,
let u guide by higher i

Jim

reply to post by Jakal26


I had such an experience myself, about a year ago, right here in my home. I was home alone, watching TV news turned down low, and I stood up for some reason or other. I sat back down, and thought to myself that 'hey, I stood up, but my body did not.' I then felt compelled to again stand, which I did, and from the corner of my eye saw myself still sitting on the sofa, I quickly sat down again. I gave this some thought, and saw that it didn't hurt, or nothing sinister happened, so this time I consciously stood up again, and purposely turned around and looked at my corporeal human body sitting there!

I had been "out of body" before, but never like this. To me is showed that when the time comes, I can most easily step right out of my body and go forth to any place I wish to, for when out of body, all memories are retained for me, having formed a Merkaba before going, so this should be an easy transition for me.

Click here for more information.

reply to post by JimIrie


Man, I sincerely apologize for being abrasive. I think I definitely took what you said out of context...Many times it is very difficult to understand true intent just by reading words on a screen.
I also understand what you were saying now...How what I said is oppression of the ego....Like I said it is something I struggle with daily and will never try to say I have a grasp on. I tend to be somewhat self-destructive by nature and harboring many bitter feelings for the world around me and many other things is something that I know I must overcome in this life....I will be the first to admit my shortcomings!

Now for the dream issue....I do think it would be cool to talk some more about that through a u2u....I just misinterpeted you saying that about mastering it. Sorry I had been about 48 hours with no sleep...LOL...Sometimes it will do things to the mind...

I would really enjoy some more conversation with you so maybe if you don't care I will u2u in a day or two when I have time and after I have read your series. I think we are very much on the same page regarding the ego issue as you said that you are living in society right now and that to do such a thing one must "bend" in some ways. It really is a good description of it when you say it was/is a compromise. Thanks for clarifying.!

Peace and respect to you my friend

reply to post by autowrench


Thanks for sharing your experience.
It is interesting to hear how different people experience such things in such varied ways. Some feel like they become "one" with everything. So still perceive themselves to be individuals and for some a mix of both seems to happen.

I am curious to know why some must be guided for such things to occur while some experience such things void of intent? How does one have such an experience out of nowhere? Is it a subconscious response? I am not sure....It is something I am still learning about.

I guess much of what one experiences has much to do with how they perceive "death" and the "next life". It intrigues me nonetheless.

Thank you again and thanks to the others who posted that I have no personally responded to.....I figured I would tell this story and get a reply or two....Maybe none....but it has been interesting.....

Peace