Obligated to get along with family???

reply to post by AccessDenied


Yes I do. A massive sarcastic thanks to my southern polite-at-all-costs you-will-be-a-lady-like-it-or-not upbringing. You show up, smile, hug everyone, and bring cupcakes... regardless of what you think of them.

Highly fake but it keeps the peace.

AD i had a HUGE post written and then let it all go... I think that is what we need to do with family too sometimes.. Let it go. I had a poor relationship with my grandfather. So much so that he ignored my birthday ( his wedding anniversary .. not a tough day for him to forget ).

He treated my mother poorly since my earliest childhood memory ( this was my Dad's father ). When i was in my late teens and my mother was undergoing treatment for cancer, i spoke up . My grandfather was in our kitchen telling my father that his former fiancee was divorced and living in the area. My father seemed not to care, and to be honest i cant even recall how he reacted . I was so angry at my grandfather and curious as to what his motives were with that tidbit of information. He told me i knew too much for a young girl and never addressed me again. Ever. He died when i was 24.

Do i regret having stood up for my mother? Never. Do i feel like i missed out on a relationship with my grandfather? Nah.. He was who he was. I accept that now. I dont understand why he was that way.. but as i mature ( debatable to those that know me i am sure LOL )i find that i cant or wont waste my energy on those that are negative in my life.

Chin up and know that your brother in law will never get the best of you. You are waaaaayyy too much of a dynamo to let someone THAT negative bring you down.

reply to post by SugarJ


Thanks Sugar, no worries. He and his will never get the best of me. I just needed to let off some steam. I can't believe the audacity of some people. I removed them from my life years ago, and now they feel because of pending recent events that they can just barge right back in, and that I actually want them to. Um..NO. Um ..DUH..there is a reason why I don't wave to you when you drive by, I give you the finger. Stupid much?
/Rant off.

You can choose your friends but you can't choose your family.

You can disown them though.

My Dad was first to go, but he made it easy.

Others followed and I don't miss them.

While keeping the peace may be easy for some, I believe in truth a lot more, and alcoholics, philanderers and greedy b*st*rds get treated as such....family or not.

No guilt just truth.

reply to post by nerbot


I could not have said it better.

I think it's a good idea to try to get along,I know my 2 oldest sisters didn't talk for 20 years,now they are great buddys,lol but oldest hates my big brother,and the little sister has been excommunicated ,so maybe not