Official anouncement

Thank You DG.
The greater picture is hidden for you, I don't wish to go there. :shk:
I am truely grateful for your words, but I will not let my self live a nightmare, I want Life, and we had our chance.

I see where my past needs to rest.


If I hadn't used my anger I would have curled up and died.
Literally, I deserve better than being an "accessoriy" an "attachment".
I F :bnghd: want to LIVE, I didn't chose this, but I can chose to NOT be part of it.

Thanks Khun,


Guys if I don't stop here I will be doing some serious bashing soon.
I have found my pride again, I am standing tall, and I won't put up with being made the culprit by LGM. At All.

I have been crushed and pulled my self up again, and I am F:bnghd: angry, I am not a toy, my life is not an amusement park.
Enough said.

Blessed Be
WIS

I just want to say that if the two of you cant work out your differences that everyone feels pain from time to time. If we didn't feel pain we wouldn't know what the good times are like. You have to always bear in mind that tomorrow can only get better.

Originally posted by xpert11
I just want to say that if the two of you cant work out your differences that everyone feels pain from time to time. If we didn't feel pain we wouldn't know what the good times are like. You have to always bear in mind that tomorrow can only get better.

Thank you expert11, I wish we could, but you see I was wrong and made some unforgivable mistakes. This I did to the only thing in my life that really mattered. This I did to the only person that I have ever really loved. I did this to us. She was nothing but wonderful to me and I ruined it.

Thank you WIS for being my friend, you didnt deserve this to happen to you.



[edit on 26-8-2007 by LoneGunMan]

The eagle thought he was the strongest and could soar above all others, higher and higher. The little Wren hid under his wing and when the eagle could not fly any higher the little Wren came from under his wing and flapped her little wings and soared high above the great eagle, crying and singing…she flew from his sight.

The eagle was crushed, he could not fly anymore, his wings gave out and he went crashing down on the rocks below, his other half the little Wren flew above singing, forever casting her shadow on his broken heart still beating beneath his proud chest.

The eagle knew his fear had ruined his life.

The fear of finally being free to soar with his courageous little Wren. The one that pulled him from hell and had shown him heaven. He screamed out his cry to little Wren, come back please come back I have made mistakes and I cant live in this hell.

This hell was of his own doing you see, for he had found something beyond anything any eagle before him had ever discovered. A love so great the mind could not comprehend it.

The eagle laying still awaits his death, yearning for it, hoping that in his next life he would find her again. This time he would not let The Greatest Flame be extinguished.






[edit on 7-12-2007 by LoneGunMan]

"how can you see into my eyes like open doors
leading you down into my core
where I’ve become so numb without a soul my spirit sleeping somewhere cold
until you find it there and lead it back home

(Wake me up)
Wake me up inside
(I can’t wake up)
Wake me up inside
(Save me)
call my name and save me from the dark
(Wake me up)
bid my blood to run
(I can’t wake up)
before I come undone
(Save me)
save me from the nothing I’ve become

now that I know what I’m without
you can't just leave me
breathe into me and make me real
bring me to life

(Wake me up)
Wake me up inside
(I can’t wake up)
Wake me up inside
(Save me)
call my name and save me from the dark
(Wake me up)
bid my blood to run
(I can’t wake up)
before I come undone
(Save me)
save me from the nothing I’ve become

Bring me to life
(I've been living a lie, there's nothing inside)
Bring me to life

frozen inside without your touch without your love darling only you are the life among the dead

all this time I can't believe I couldn't see
kept in the dark but you were there in front of me
I’ve been sleeping a thousand years it seems
got to open my eyes to everything
without a thought without a voice without a soul
don't let me die here
there must be something more
bring me to life

(Wake me up)
Wake me up inside
(I can’t wake up)
Wake me up inside
(Save me)
call my name and save me from the dark
(Wake me up)
bid my blood to run
(I can’t wake up)
before I come undone
(Save me)
save me from the nothing I’ve become

(Bring me to life)
I’ve been living a lie, there’s nothing inside
(Bring me to life)"

I keep holding onto this thread of life that is left in me, only because my community needs me. For you and I though I am a dead man walking aren’t I? Never an answer from you, ignored u2u’s, emails, and cries for some help.

I have been in love a few times before. With very beautiful women. Some were models. None of that really mattered though, it was all just skin deep.

None saw the world like you and I did though. I have never meant anyone that does, until last spring. Why wont this suffering inside me stop? I try so hard to forget you, but something always yanks me back.

The mornings are the worst. After having dreams of us together, I wake up and am crushed all over again. I only write here because it is futile to write to you, and I don’t give a damn who reads my pain. I am pretty sure you wont read this either but wtf, it feels like I am talking to you at least.

My badge reminds me everyday that I must stay alive for I have taken an oath.

So I keep going. For the people, for the Brotherhood.

No tears in heaven.





One more


[edit on 9-12-2007 by LoneGunMan]

It's nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home...

When you've lost it all thats when you finally realize that...

Life is beautiful

You can't quit until you try
You can't live until you die
You can't learn to tell the truth until you learn to lie
You can't breathe until you choke
You gotta laugh when you're the joke
It's nothing like a funeral to make you feel alive

Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful
Will you swear on your life that no one will cry at my funeral

I know some things that you don't
I've done things that you won't
It's nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home
I was waiting for my hearse
What came next was so much worse
It took a funeral to make me feel alive

Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful
Will you swear on your life that no one will cry at my funeral

Alive
Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful
Will you swear on your life that no one will cry at my funeral

Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful
Will you swear on your life that no one will cry at my funeral

Dude I feel for you I really do but, you have to stop this. At this point your cryptic posts are actually pretty unsettling, and I am not trying to berate you or anything but try to look at it like this, If a man who can understand the whole regret of a tremndous lost love can be unsettled by your behavior what do you think the one you lost is going to think about it?

These things are unfortunate they really are perhaps you really did see the error in your ways, but it doesnt change the fact your pleas are falling on deaf ears. No amount of begging and pleading is going to change anything at this point he most you can do is accept the loss and move on. Perhaps one day the Almighy will move the world for you two to figure it out. But you should be prepared to understand that it may not be a love that was intended for you to have for but a moment.

Stop crying over sand up and be a man you made choices and now you must face the consequences of those choices. This is nothing new and nothing unique to you my friend, it is a part of life. All past relationships are is a means to preparing you for the next one, take the lessons you have learned and apply them to your next one. Find something more positie to focus on and just let go, if it is meant to be it will hapen you just dont get to decide when it will.

Originally posted by Jovi1

Stop crying over sand up and be a man you made choices and now you must face the consequences of those choices.

Well thank you for pointing out to me what is obvious. You say for me to stand up and be a man? You dont know me at all, how can you make such a statement? Try walking in my shoes, then you can make that statement.I left a mentally abusive wife, and had to sacrifice MY happiness and went back to make sure our house was not lost to the bank and ended up stuck here because I tried to do the right thing. I had the guts to face my family after leaving just to make sure my abusive wife did not end up on the streets and she paid me back by manipulating the situation so that my soulmate hates me. Now I am stuck trying to sell this damn house and be free but have no one to talk to about it. I did NOTHING except to try and do the right thing.

So I vented here.

I am well aware of how I sound on this thread. It helps me purge the feelings I can not share in real life. Venting here made me feel better.

Right up until I read your post.

Peace, LGM

Maybe this is the only way for you to get my messages? Just in case someone is deleting your u2u's I will make an attempt here. There are signs of you everywhere and I can feel your presence. The synchronicities are as strong as they were last year. I wouldn't be writing this but we both know who the wolf was for in your Avatar, he is gone now and your location is watching your back and mood is present. I don't know.

Neither one of us are very happy right now.

I am a little confused...

[edit on 25-3-2008 by LoneGunMan]

I saw your new Avatar...nevermind.

If you log on and see this I wouldn't mind hearing from you.

Maybe send me a u2u?

I was listening to Runrig and our song kind of got me down...here it is.



[edit on 1-2-2009 by LoneGunMan]

a reply to: WalkInSilence

scary

you are exactly like us ! everything is sooo weird

and both a happy or a sad ending to this story scared the living hell out of me !!

I do want you to know I am reading then I don't want to bring up old stuff and I also don't want to know more but it reminds me of a crystal ball and I don't want you to be the psychic lady showing me my future

sorry I hope this will get across as I intend it.. I just don't want to know lol freaky this whole thing you is so darn weird
please ignore me I am just crying out loud I wish u a beautiful day and yes please keep meI out of the loop frankly I am freaked out right now it will pass just can't go on without a comment