aaargh

I have been getting kinda frusturated with myself for not having a girlfriend by now but I for whatever dumbars reason dont because I have too high of standards (especially dumb because lets face it I'm not to good lookin myself...) I have really started to hate myself over it. What should I do?

talk to girls?

I know I'm a wuss....
ah well...
guess I knew what to do but didn't have the balls to do so...
Godd*** me...

Originally posted by TristanBW9456

(especially dumb because lets face it I'm not to good lookin myself...)

If it's weight, exercise or whatever you have to do to change it.

If it is a medical condition like acne, search out help in the medical world.

If it is fashion, seek help from someone near you "in the know" to help you.

If it is personality, evaluate yourself and find what may be turning people away, then make changes to yourself to eliminate that part.

And yeah, talk to girls.

JDub

OK, you're going to make sure you present yourself well (probably no need to tell you this but part of giving advice): shower, brush teeth, comb hair, and trim and clean fingernails. You probably wear clean clothes. Ok, you're ready to find a girl to talk to. Try to start out with someone you would enjoy talking to, maybe a girl that shares same interests. When you've picked one out, Smile, introduce yourself and ask a question (I saw you in the computer lab, class, etc were you working on the report, what music were you listening to , something like that. Now if all this still sounds too overwhelming, do any of your friends, guys you hang out with, have friends who are girls you could practice just talking to? You talk with guys, you can talk with girls, just don't talk to girls like you're in the boys locker room, you're trying to impress a girl not a guy. Remember, relax and be yourself, let the conversation grow, she might be shy, too, but girls like to talk so make sure you listen. Use each experience as a practice for the next time. You probably know all this already, so just go out and practice. Don't be intimidated by others, you'll get your skill level up with practice. Oh, take advantage of your school, youth center, church group for chances to get together with girls at dances, meetings, etc. Come to think of it, I'll bet you're good at videogames. Think how much time you spend to master them and don't give up, well, with time and practice you'll master conversation, too.

Ever see those really oogly guys with totally hot girls? Well they don't pay them to hang around.

I myself prefer personality over aesthetics (within reason) and personality is unfortunately something that takes longer to develope in guys that have no challenges.

I prefer a guy who's had to work on himself either physically or mentally. Someone who has overcome obstacles that others know nothing about - like looks.

I was a short stocky freckled red headed girly - I blossomed one day and the first time a man ever told me I was beautiful I killed myself laughing. Having grown up being teased relentlessly, I actually avoid the GQ guys...they haven't got a clue. Sure I look but, it's the "flawed" guy that wins out.

You'd be surprised how many women prefer a guy with a great personality. If you're looking for the hotties to boost your own ego though, you best have some cash handy cuz eye candy isn't cheap. A truly beautiful woman is one who shines from within and the same can be said about a man.

If you're not happy with yourself, that would be why you are single. Honestly.

Maybe try going out with some mates, have a beer to get your confidence up abit and just start talking to the first girl that grabs your attention.

The first time may not work but like everything else, practise makes perfect.

Hell thats another problem! Theres no where to go here and no one to go with...
At least I had a chance where I used to live...

Yeah, moving can be a bummer. Going from familiar territory to unknown. Consider it a challenge, kind of like unlocking the secrets to a video game. If you came from a big city, your new town might seem small and dumpy. Remember, there are people moving from even smaller towns to one your size, and thinking "Good!" Go online to find what there is in your city. Gotta get out and get connected. How about a local skate park?

I realise that you probably don't want to hear this, I know you are frustrated and all, but maybe this just isn't the right time.

The above suggestions are great and I wouldn't hesitate to take them, but after that maybe you should just work on being at peace. I think things happen when they do for a reason. Maybe it just isn't the right time for a relationship.

Lonliness bites, and it is really frustrating - there's no doubt about it. However, look at what you really want. Do you really want a girl friend or is it more a case of you really want to be happy and a girlfriend is what you believe will make you happy? My guess would be that you want what most every person wants - to be happy.

Trust me on this one - a poor relationship can make you the most miserable person in the entire universe. Relationships bring great potential for happiness, and just as great a potential for misery.

I guess... I know your right but do not want to hear it... whatev...

Originally posted by BlueTileSpookIf it is fashion, seek help from someone near you "in the know" to help you.

You could wear tight black jeans, affect an asexual accent, wear t-shirts of bands that you've never heard of, and dye your hair black and wear it in an effeminate way.

Originally posted by TristanBW9456 emo/goth/punk rock

what is with all of the people wearing tons of balck, cutting themselves, and guys wearing really tight pants. This is getting really stupid. Its the next dumbest thing next to sagging.

LOL ! Sorry, couldn't help myself.


[edit on 13-5-2006 by Beelzebubba]

Originally posted by TristanBW9456
I guess... I know your right but do not want to hear it... whatev...

Word up from the bay area, I feel your pain. Dude, just browse around craigslist a little and chat with some other lonely people. Learn what works, what doesn't work...

If you don't want to buy books on the matter, do a search for David DeAngelo and sign up for his e-mail list. I wouldn't recommend buying the book cause everything in it he says in the emails.

The people above have mentoned the most important things though... be happy without a significant other and finding that SO will become much easier.

Peace out from Oaktown.

Nice one beezlebubba!
What the hell is craigslist anyway???...