NN2021 Today

originally posted by: MountainLaurel
Sad

Sorry for your loss Lumenari, it’s brutal.

It is just life.

Things happen that are entirely out of our control and you have to deal with them.

I today found something that my brother wrote a long time ago.

I posted it in the kitchen so I can read it in the mornings and start thinking about it again.

Live life to its fullest. With open arms, with an open heart but most importantly, an open mind.

Words to live by.

originally posted by: Lumenari
a reply to: Bigburgh

I'm a person with a horrid and despicable past that was given the opportunity to live a real life.

She set my goalposts, she gave me hope in humanity.

The dark part of my soul she balanced out.

I'm going to keep being good in her memory.

She was the best part of both of us.

THIS.

I can't state it as beautifully as you have...but my 'she' was responsible for bringing out my better self and restraining my baser one.

It took time...and I now know I was often difficult for her...even though I wasn't as aware of it as I should've been at the time.
But she loved me in a way I've never known before, or since, she was in my life.

Now that she's physically gone...I can never replace her...only love and value her gifts as I do her.


See...there I go trying to be as eloquent as you.
Epic fail.

a reply to: IAMTAT

It took time...and I now know I was often difficult for her...even though I wasn't as aware of it as I should've been at the time.

But she loved me in a way I've never known before, or since, she was in my life.

I think you were quite eloquent on the subject.

As for me in retrospect I would like to give a word of advice to anyone in a relationship BEFORE you lose someone important to you.

It is a line from the movie The Crow, of all places.

Little things used to mean so much to Shelly. I used to think they were kind of... trivial. Believe me, nothing is trivial.

I too never realized how much time and energy she put into making me better until she was no longer here.

The times I blew her off on the little things because they were not that important to me?

THOSE are the things I am regretting now.

a reply to: Lumenari

There are people who write , even people who try to write .

Then there are Writers , you can tell it's effortless for you to write .

beautiful story truly .

originally posted by: asabuvsobelow
a reply to: Lumenari

There are people who write , even people who try to write .

Then there are Writers , you can tell it's effortless for you to write .

beautiful story truly .

Writing is getting easier for me to do.

Opening myself up and sharing what I feel with people I don't know is... really hard.

But to me, the best Writers do exactly that.

So I am practicing.

Thank you for your kind words.

I had read this right when you wrote it and couldn’t comment yet cause I needed my password

it’s so sadly sweet.

originally posted by: IAMTAT
a reply to: Lumenari

You're one helluva writer.
I felt your ennui...I lost a wife as well.

Now that the contest is over I would like to gift you 1,000 Lumenari points (they are worth the same as stars, which is nothing) for using the word ennui in a sentence.

I should have titled my entry "Ennui".

It exactly describes my life right now.