Here's a joke for you - Brexit!

Let's face it, Brexit and the state the Tory Party have got us into are hilarious (if you don't laugh you have to weep).

So here are some of the jokes and puns I've heard and read about Brexit.

Feel free to add your own...

Q: Why do Brits love tea so much?
A: Because tea leaves!

Q: How much space will be created by the UK leaving the EU?
A: 1GB

Q: What did Britain say to her trade partners?
A: See EU later!

Voters: We want to give a boat a silly name!
UKGov: No!
Voters: We want to break up the EU and f**k up the world economy!
UKGov: OK!

"A lot of Leave voters say ‘Stop complaining, it’s democracy!’ Well democracy doesn’t always work. If five people democratically elect to take your iPhone, it’s a mugging.” – Dane Baptiste

"I voted Remain, not just for political reasons but because my mum’s moved to Spain and I want her to stay there.” – Leo Kearse

"How about that Brexit, huh? I’ve haven’t seen so many Brits pull out since Madonna was dating.” – Conan O’Brien’s ‘Brexitbot’

"Brexit was like the UK got drunk and accidentally unfriended Europe on Facebook.” – Leo Kearse

Knock knock!

Who's there?

Brexit.

Brexit who?

It's not my job to tell you that, work it out for yourself!

"What’s the best way of uniting Britain following Brexit? The unexpected death of an attractive Royal!” – The Man’s Daddy

“David Cameron announced he is stepping down in the wake of a vote, which should make me happy, but it doesn’t. It’s like catching an ice cream cone out of the air, because a child has been hit by a car. I’ll eat it! But it’s tainted somehow.” – John Oliver

May I als add...

Theresa May!

Yeah... it’s a joke because it was skewed and biased from the start, with a EU globalist puppet at the wheel who then repeatedly trying to derail it

No Deal - WTO

It’s that simple, that’s what we voted for and that’s what we’ll get, or we’ll follow suit with Franch, at this point time for talkings over, we’ll never live in an undemocratic NWO dictatorship

Q Why is Sean Connery a Remainer ?
A He's not for Breg#

The US Corporation fears the day Texas tells them to go piss in the wind.
I reckon it's about the same over there.

originally posted by: skunkape23
The US Corporation fears the day Texas tells them to go piss in the wind.
I reckon it's about the same over there.

Texit?

:p

a reply to: djz3ro

Is the UK leaving the EU in May, or are they gonna leave May in the EU?

a reply to: Nothin

I like what you did there but we leave the EU in March but we may ditch May by May...

Best one:

People: We want to leave.
Government: Well vote on it.
People: We voted, and it passed.
Government: Ummm, no.

originally posted by: gallop
Best one:

People: We want to leave.
Government: Well vote on it.
People: We voted, and it passed.
Government: Ummm, no.

Could be premature but I'll give you that, though is that funny or scary?

I can see how it might be funny but that's from a Remainer point of view, I think it will be more scary if we do leave but it's what we voted for and it should be happening.

I corrected it for you:


People: We want to leave.
Government: Well vote on it.
People: We voted, and it passed.
Government: Ummm...
People: Wait, what did we vote about? Crap!
Government: We don't wanna do this.
People: We neither, but we can not pull out, can we?
Government: Hey, lets try this: embarrass ourselves in view to everyone, have some loud clowns yell around and then look surprised when the date comes closer!
People: You what? We did not want that, we wanted what we were promised! No more taxes, no more laws!
Government: Well... about this north ireland..
People: What about that? Build a wall in the channel, then remove it and rebuild it! We want both and none of this!


Guys, the brexit is a desaster. Nothing else. I do not want the people to suffer, but this is a problem with no easy solution whatever the loud yellers promise you.

What do we want?

We want Brexit!

How do we want it?

Erm...

originally posted by: djz3ro
a reply to: Nothin

I like what you did there but we leave the EU in March but we may ditch May by May...

Oh! 3 Mays, with the mayonnaise, you win!

originally posted by: ManFromEurope
I corrected it for you:


People: We want to leave.
Government: Well vote on it.
People: We voted, and it passed.
Government: Ummm...
People: Wait, what did we vote about? Crap!
Government: We don't wanna do this.
People: We neither, but we can not pull out, can we?
Government: Hey, lets try this: embarrass ourselves in view to everyone, have some loud clowns yell around and then look surprised when the date comes closer!
People: You what? We did not want that, we wanted what we were promised! No more taxes, no more laws!
Government: Well... about this north ireland..
People: What about that? Build a wall in the channel, then remove it and rebuild it! We want both and none of this!


Guys, the brexit is a desaster. Nothing else. I do not want the people to suffer, but this is a problem with no easy solution whatever the loud yellers promise you.

This is a problem only because the EU want to make it as big of a problem as possible, to dissuade other countries waking up and doing the same. Britain will be fine with a no deal Brexit but the EU will suffer. I hope your leaders wake up and realise they CANNOT bully us into submission, it is just not in our nature to accept the way we are being talked to by your leaders.

If you can't see the tides turning that's not our problem. We can and we want out before the hot dog# mess of the EU collapses in on itself. The French are a pretty good indicator of the rest of Europe, always have been a good nationalism barometer. Do they seem happy with Brussels? Do they seem happy with socialism?

"Threatening" Britain with a no-deal Brexit is laughable. It's so obvious to the whole world how desperate the EU is to keep us in. Start treating us like the sovereign nation we are and you might be lucky enough for us to bow out gracefully but keep up the rhetoric and bullying and you will get a couple of fingers at most.

a reply to: Dem0nc1eaner

Well, according to people on ATS, you don't have a clue what you want, so being controlled by people you didn't even vote for is a good thing.

And enjoy the globalist orders, or else !!!

Gimme some humour people

Another good point about E.U....

... Do you really want to live in the Nitd Kingdom of Grat Britain and Northrn Irland?

lul.... nice joke

originally posted by: djz3ro
Gimme some humour people

Well, now you know how it feels. -An American