Why does everyone think they MUST belong????

originally posted by: CagliostroTheGreat
nullafides

The same reason you started this thread.

👍

No, that logic does not work here.

I started this thread because of the recent events in society which are germane to the topic at hand.

a reply to: jappee
I think we seek validation for a huge variety of reasons. Most of the time it is related to communal living, and self checksuming for societal norms. Some reasons are strictly personal, and sometimes we have no clue to why we seek validation from our peers.

I think you may find this TED video interesting and a little insightful.

originally posted by: GemmyMcGemJew
"Why do people need to be recognised".

Always makes me laugh when someone starts a thread with that as the main premise. Lol.

Plain and simple we evolved this way. Social dynamics and cohesion were a vital part of our success as a species and enhanced our chances of survival. We can live independently more than ever but we are more than likely feeling the effects of a genome lag. What was once beneficial and a key survival tool is not as relevant in today's society, like depression. It's still a driving force that we won't shed for thousands of years to come.

It would seem that you evolved this way. I did not. Nor did the people whom I love and care for.

a reply to: NightSkyeB4Dawn

No, I do not need a pop-culture "I'm an expert, and I'm going to explain it to you" validation.

I am perfectly well aware it is the overall pack mentality that we share with the other animal species of this planet.



My confidence, and my ego, are self sustaining.

a reply to: NightSkyeB4Dawn

It seems you have me confused as some without meaningful direction or self worth. or?? I may be reading you wrong.
The TED video is actually describing some things I have experienced..Off-grid living. No cell phone..until recent..I only got one since I arrived here, it is vital where I live. I have never had a credit card and never will, debit cards/prepay works just fine. FB for me is for communication abroad. I'm in the Philippines, family is in California, besides those whom I connect with in the U.S., without need for some communal support stream. I could do without it. It is just cost effective. I hate 85% of social sites. ATS being an exception. Agnostic if I have to categorize a religious alignment. I value being in a community, just not as one of "them", but me.
I am an addict...I confess
The Babymetal Addiction Center and Support Group
I think you have me confused..
What are you suggesting?
Do you know me?

a reply to: nullafides

Would the Google™ /farcebook™ algorithm agree? That is why 'THEY' herd You into a 'group' and when folks self-surrender when they join said group, they're doing the Gov't.'s job..

Would You rather have 1 herd of 1,000 cattle or 20 herds of 50 cattle?

Lend a friend Your cell phone and a credit card and send them to a sporting event and then see how Your life will change and see if You can notice it..

a reply to: nullafides


Group think? Hive mentality? Perhaps such lack of self esteem that once they find others that think as they do, they find some self worth? Problem is that they then seek power over others to push their cause?

I am nutty and mad as a hatter! Don't give a damn what anyone thinks about me nor do I need anyone to validate what took me years of mistakes and plenty of alone time to discard everything forced upon me that I carried as baggage to "Identify" who I was!

I will think for myself, and to hell with anyone who gets upset at me because I choose to not conform with their idea of what is appropriate or right in their view!


Otherwise, I don't need anyone's approval to be me!

a reply to: seeker1963

Group think to me is the most abhorrent thing I can imagine.

It is disgusting.

a reply to: nullafides

All Hail the individual who is confident in whom he/she is.

I suspect its partially because we are born to parents so grow up during our forma tie years in their care. Its their friends and those they introduce us to. Later its our choice etc. Some are social butterflies often feeding off the thoughts and ideas of others because of being shallow. Others have more content and are interesting and often fun etc

But perhaps its because we don't hatch from eggs that we have these ties as young and teens like to go around in a group or herd. The loose touch once in the real world except with those they live near by or reach through social media.

By labelling someone it is easier to dehumanise them - people love to label, compartmentalise, then hate.

You no longer are attacking, hurting a person, but some kind of perceived entity which is much easier on the human mind.

a reply to: jappee
My mistake. I posted from the wrong screen. My mobile device is not very ATS friendly. I was responding to nullafides post.

But in response to your comment,

I hate 85% of social sites. ATS being an exception.

ATS is not really an exception. Many of us claim that we don't seek validation, we don't seek to belong, yet here we all are.

a reply to: nullafides

Interesting.

Do you think subconsciously you need to belong and require positive reinforcement from us as your group/peers - hence the posting of this thread?

(I'm not having a dig, I'm genuinely asking you to explore your subconscious because opinions projected externally are usually the opposite of what's going on internally/sub consciously).

a reply to: NightSkyeB4Dawn

originally posted by: and14263
a reply to: nullafides

Interesting.

Do you think subconsciously you need to belong and require positive reinforcement from us as your group/peers - hence the posting of this thread?

(I'm not having a dig, I'm genuinely asking you to explore your subconscious because opinions projected externally are usually the opposite of what's going on internally/sub consciously).

No, not in the slightest. And, I'm being rather honest about that. I'm simply using the rant forum for expressing my disdain.....

a reply to: jappee

You were not born 100,000 years ago when it was beneficial unfortunately.

a reply to: nullafides

This is a truly beautiful rant. I believe much the same as you.

Screw society.

a reply to: NightSkyeB4Dawn

ATS is not really an exception. Many of us claim that we don't seek validation, we don't seek to belong, yet here we all are.

Irony at it's most obvious; and those claiming to be such original thinkers invariably align themselves with either the left or Right wing politically.

and to add irony upon irony....they can't even see it in themselves....no group think here!!!

originally posted by: DBCowboy
a reply to: nullafides

Once you identify yourself as "something" then you can be categorized and subsequently, manipulated.

Also, once you categorize, if you pick the right category, you get stuff.

Think about it. I have Joan, Frank, Steve and Fred working for me. I need to let one go because of tough times. I let go of Steve. It's a no brainer really. Joan is a woman. Frank is gay. Fred is black. Steve is a WASP. Of them all, Steve is the only one without any victim advocacy to stand up for him. He's the safest one to fire no matter what his personal work ethic or record with me might be.

Bye Steve!

So, pigeon-holing yourself can be important.

Geez, I'm cynical today.

a reply to: ketsuko

I'm actually a Panda. I just self identify as an elderly fat man.


So I'm safe.
(it's not that big of a stretch)

originally posted by: DBCowboy
a reply to: ketsuko

I'm actually a Panda. I just self identify as an elderly fat man.


So I'm safe.
(it's not that big of a stretch)

I love you (in a platonic, non-gay way).