witnessing trauma, followed by nightmares, possible ptsd?

i was vending at a small market on saturday, witnessed a horrific motorcycle vs; pickup truck crash.
2 fatalities, a few of us vendors along with a couple other passersby were the first on the scene.
i've witnessed crashes before, but not like this.
in a way i want to type out the gory details, but something is telling me not to.
i have no doubt many here, including myself have witnessed death before, but this is the first time it
has hit me this hard. i've had horrible nightmares the last 2 nights, i keep picturing the teenagers and motorcycle rider.
just so everyone knows i'm not making this up, here is a link to a news clip about the actual crash.

local news of crash

so, i'd like to hear from some people who have witnessed such things,
will the nightmares subside in time?
if not, should i seek professional help?
the 3 teens wandered through the market minutes before this happened, one was obviously autistic, or similar, and
he's the one who died, i clearly remember him asking the others if he could sit by the window on the ride home.
the cops interviewed us on saturday, but no one i know witnessed anything beyond what i did,
a loud crash, not even any screeching brakes, and upon looking that way, watching the truck roll at least twice.

a reply to: rubbertramp

Yes, the nightmares will subside in time. I have PTSD and suffered from pretty brutal nightmares on the subject of my trauma for a bit. What my therapist explained to me is that the sleeping mind was both trying to make sense of the traumatic event and desensitize me to it as a method of dealing. Recurring nightmares of traumas are pretty common and a trauma can occur even when you weren't directly involved so don't feel silly either.

The best thing to do when you wake up in a panic is to calm yourself down and remind yourself of the above--it was just a dream, the event itself did not recur and the dreams are trying to get you to deal. Then make sure you do deal with what you saw but in the context of it being a past event. My therapist also suggested lucid dreaming so that, when in the midst of it, you can stand in the dream and say "this is not real" or even take control. The sooner you start doing these things, the sooner the nightmares will end. I was having unchecked recurring nightmares at least 3-4 times a night for 3 mos before meeting with this therapist. In a month, the nightmares were pretty much gone.

The key is, I think, making sure to associate the nightmares with being dreams meant to help you--not pose additional harm. Good luck and hang in there.

a reply to: WhiteAlice

thank you so much, it really makes sense, and is very close to what i've been going through.
it's no fun waking up covered in sweat and gasping for air.

a reply to: rubbertramp

Yep, really hated waking up like that, too. Originally, I had sleeping pills thrown at me and that wasn't much of a help. Far better to just go through it and get through it for sure. A lot of times, it can feel like your sleeping mind has become your enemy but honestly, it's just trying to hash stuff out. So no worries, your mind isn't out to get yourself when you're sleeping. I was thinking that for a bit when I was going through it.

Another thing that you might try is actually writing out what happened, all that you remembered and how you felt at the time and feel about it now. Nightmares tend to be those subjects that we're trying to avoid thinking about. Maybe a few writing sessions where you do think about it will help stop the nightmare cycle, too.

i've been writing out my dreams for years, helps me remember them.
it's strange when sometimes you wake up in the morning and remember a dream
completely different from what you wrote down in the middle of the night.

Just a couple weeks ago i was in the car with a friend who turned out to be dumber and drunker than i thought. He hit a pedestrian on the way home...a chick out for a run...idk what happened to her but a 40mph collision even through a turn where it wasnt a clip but a full hit. It #ed me up a bit. I no longer hang out with that person and i had about a week or 2 of messed up thoughts emotions and dreams. They do subside but when you recall the event they will all flood back. Its the nature of the game...you will never forget and remove it just learn to cope.

a reply to: rubbertramp

As one who witnessed the death of a friend who ran off a bus straight into traffic I highly recommend you seek some form of counseling.

Unfortunately this occurred long before the help that is available today .

I suffered for years with stuttering, anxiety,nightmares and lost self esteem.

So yes, by all means seek help in dealing.

DON'T DRINK UNTIL YOU LEVEL OFF! Avoid taking SSRIs and have ANOTHER look at weed.

a reply to: RickyD

man, that's a rough one. i'm 50 now, and completely convinced that just like with broken bones, we heal quicker when younger.
i witnessed 2 friends die in my teens, and it didn't hit me nearly as hard as this.
sorry to hear you had to go through such a tragedy.

without getting into to many details, one of my dreams was about watching the biker 'bleed out', it was like in the movies, watching the pool of blood work it's way across the blacktop.
in my dream it just doesn't stop, but keeps going.

a reply to: dezertdog

thanx, and i think there is a good chance i will, but to be honest, i have no insurance, so am worried about out of pocket cost.
my pockets are not very deep right now.
kinda' sucks i have to say that, but it is the truth.

a reply to: rubbertramp

Sucks you had to witness that. i find that things like that have a funny way of grounding you and showing you whats really important in life. Sucks it happens like that though.

PTSD requires work. You have to really break down the barriers and allow yourself to feel the emotion of the traumas and learn about it and identify it.

It helps to connect with the experience and come to terms with it.

originally posted by: cavtrooper7
DON'T DRINK UNTIL YOU LEVEL OFF! Avoid taking SSRIs and have ANOTHER look at weed.

been sober for over a decade, so no worry there, the other i'll think about, i do partake on occasion, but not often.
i avoid scripts like the plague, so i have no plan to change that.

thanx to everybody for sharing, this is exactly what i was hoping for.
sometimes just knowing your not alone helps by itself.

a reply to: onequestion

the ptsd part was really just a guess on my part, assuming so because of the dreams.
in no way am i educated enough in the field to diagnose myself.

as i'm reading this and thinking about it, one thing keeps coming to mind.
it's a very small town, everyone knows each other, and this is the first time i remembered watching some of the paramedics and firemen cry, literally, they knew the dead teen they had to remove from the wreck and i can now clearly see tears in a few of their eyes.
should i continue with some of these thoughts or not?

a reply to: rubbertramp

No i think you probably had a trauma.

It doesnt have to be from war you know.

I have had it in the past but i cant discuss it on ATS. Not without violating T&C. Sad really.

originally posted by: rubbertramp
as i'm reading this and thinking about it, one thing keeps coming to mind.
it's a very small town, everyone knows each other, and this is the first time i remembered watching some of the paramedics and firemen cry, literally, they knew the dead teen they had to remove from the wreck and i can now clearly see tears in a few of their eyes.
should i continue with some of these thoughts or not?

Yes, when you talk/write about what you are thinking it helps you internalize your feelings and deal with it. When you don't, the upset doesn't go away, it gets pushed down but surfaces later, at least in my experience.

My Grandma was killed when I was a pre-teen and I made a thread here, trying to sort out my complicated feelings regarding forgiveness. I worked through a lot of emotions in that thread and then talked to my Dad about it, and now, a couple of years later, those issues I had been trying to deal with for years (now I am 46) seem to have evaporated. It wasn't fun, but I think it was necessary.

So yes, I think you should go ahead and write about those thoughts that will not leave your mind. Most people who reply will do so because they can relate and want to share and try to help. A few may reply who are less than helpful, just ignore anybody mean and converse with the ones who are helping.

HUGS for you from Goodyear!! I am sorry you are going through this.
Gwynn

The thing with PTSD is that if you get treatment very soon after experiencing the trauma, you likely won't have the long term effects. I know you said you didn't have a ton of cash at the moment, and I don't know where you live, but maybe there's some counselling available to you on a sliding fee scale. A lot of communities have that.

You're doing exactly what you need to be doing, TALKING about it.

Get it out there talk to people about it. Get together with the other vendors and see if they feel the same. My guess is that they probably do.

a reply to: rubbertramp

Psychology of the body - PTSD (questions, observations from personal experiences)

the above thread might be helpful.

I have severe PTSD and because of it, I have done a lot of research. In times of trauma...a lot of People's processing ability struggles. The memories become distorted so that one moment @ 10 pm then becomes entwined with another event at 10.35pm. I hope that makes sense? Either way, it is a bitch of an illness. I would not wish it on anyone.

Terrible as it is, if I hear a word that cognitively takes me to a memory of trauma, I become disorientated and confused with era, recognizing the reality. It also effects the eye sight.
I try to laugh at my own illness but, for eg: 'when 4 People were standing in one spot, I only saw one person but that person's 'eyes' changed 4 times'

Cars vanish when in fact they don't... it is a terrible illness.

If your getting flashes of memories interrupting your daily life, if you are experiencing loss of time, things vanishing... etc you may have PTSD.

originally posted by: onequestion
a reply to: rubbertramp

No i think you probably had a trauma.

It doesnt have to be from war you know.

I have had it in the past but i cant discuss it on ATS. Not without violating T&C. Sad really.

Are your talking about a substance?

Many Countries are now legalizing it.
A study showed that Soldiers who had used this substance did not develop PTSD...those that did not... developed PTSD.

the study is incredible... I tend to feel that that is why many Countries are now decriminalizing it.