What I want you to use my body for after I die.

I give permission for my body to be temporarily used as a speed bump on a highway that passes by a elementary school.
You can use the hair on my dead body to replace the hair of balding women, though there is nothing really wrong with a bald woman.
My liver can be used to find out whether 35 years of too much alcohol can be somewhat negated by a very healthy diet (true).
You can use my brain to find out whether it's size is related to the size of my penis, and whether this relationship matters.

Finally, you can use my dead body to start a cheerful blaze in your fireplace. Will that smell? If not, enjoy.

originally posted by: droid56
I give permission for my body to be temporarily used as a speed bump on a highway that passes by a elementary school.
You can use the hair on my dead body to replace the hair of balding women, though there is nothing really wrong with a bald woman.
My liver can be used to find out whether 35 years of too much alcohol can be somewhat negated by a very healthy diet (true).
You can use my brain to find out whether it's size is related to the size of my penis, and whether this relationship matters.

Finally, you can use my dead body to start a cheerful blaze in your fireplace. Will that smell? If not, enjoy.

I understand your logic brother.. But I have to ask.. Are you suicidal? If you are it is perfectly normal in this sh*t world, just asking.
Fp

a reply to: FirePiston

No, not suicidal. But I think that after we die, our body is just a rotting corpse.

originally posted by: droid56
a reply to: FirePiston

No, not suicidal. But I think that after we die, our body is just a rotting corpse.

I agree.. This flesh and blood is just a vessel, and our real true self leaves this corpse.
FP

Donate your body to science as a medical cadaver. My whole family is set up for that one.

a reply to: NarcolepticBuddha

I wouldn't mind being used as a medical cadaver ... as long as someone set up a great prank while i was kind'a fresh.

Are you in bad health? I need to quit smoking and drinking, but stop drinking? idk if I want that, almost would rather live it up young, and die kinda of young. I'm a chef at a very nice brew pub, and have a healthy diet, but alcohol def takes a toll. I'm about to be 27, and I think it is too late to turn back, but turning back now might get me an extra 10 years. YOLO ONCE! (

a reply to: droid56
My body can be used as well...
Unfortunately when they cut me for harvest, they will be confronted with a burnt out husk of what was a human male.
Now the scientific discussion can start, how in the hell did this guy live so long?? And he must have had one hell of a good time at it!

a reply to: droid56

You can use the hair on my dead body to replace the hair of balding women - See more at: www.abovetopsecret.com...

Would you by any chance happen to have red hair?

I think more and more people are beginning to see the human body as nothing more than an empty vessel after death. I wonder if the outrageous cost of funerals now days has something to do with it?

I asked Johns Hopkins in Baltimore of they wanted my body for Sjogrens research. They said 'no'. So I plan on being cremated. I"m so ticked at my body breaking down that my husband said ... I know how you hate that body so I'll be a good husband and cremate you twice. I liked that .... revenge on a broken body!!

I my self, would like to be a medical cadaver. BUT, I'd like a note tied to my toe for the young intern, that says,

" I hope you learn something from this, to go on and discover something huge, and you can look back and say, "If I didn't have the one cadaver, I would have never discovered this."

Ehh, I know, not gonna happen. Usually, there really isn't much of a back ground on cadavers, I don't think.

I am also going to be at my funeral. I'm not gonna say how, but, I told my ol' man to make sure everyone gets drunk.

It will kinda be like a party from the Twilight Zone. Just my style!

a reply to: droid56

Not sure how long your remains would last as a speedbump bud...could get messy fast-but it would make me slow down for sure-and reverse at speed.
I would be happy to be buried in a forest myself (but not by a serial killer) and have a tree planted on me,yew or oak are my preferences.
Hopefully not for a good few decades yet.

I've told my family that I wish to be cremated when I finally die. They asked me what I wanted them to do with the ashes, and I replied "Flush them for all I'll care at that point."

It's just a body, and I won't be needing it after I go.

In order to fulfill all that you have given permission for, permission to use your pens is necessary. For the penis/brain size study. You specifically gave permission for the use of your brain for such a study, but your hypothetical contract is missing permission for the use of your penis. So, if you plan to actually have this list as your final requests or something like that of a legal nature, you may want to consider that.

As for me, I plan to use the last of my money to travel to a place where people are starving, and tell them that they can just eat my body if they want and maybe use the bones for tools or something. The skull could make a nice soup bowl for example. Some bones could be used as a knife handle. The skin could be used for something like binding books or as actual writing paper, or a wallet or some type of clothing like a hat or a face mask or a shirt or cape. The scrotum could be a coin purse.

I too believe there is nothing really sacred or special about a human body once it is lifeless. I respect the traditions though because I realize some people need that. It's not for the person who died, they are no longer in that body. All the funeral ceremonies are just to help those left behind to transition into their new state of existence in life without that person who died being a part of it anymore except perhaps in spirit, and memory, and such... And some people need that. I guess most do. Some people may need it after I die.

But it's still a fun idea to imagine that our bodies could go to a real, tangible use other than becoming worm food, and subsequently fertilizer for plants. Not that it isn't an honorable purpose, no! But I just think it doesn't have to be the Only purpose. That and cremation. I wonder if those ashes are healthy for garden plants like other types of ash are supposed to have nutrients?

a reply to: SixX18

You only live once, once? Holy crap I think I just lol'ed out loud! Haha anyway I came back to say it's scary to donate organs or donate your body to science after hearing all the stories about how they thought someone was dead but then a day or two later they woke up in the morgue... How do we truly know when someone truly is truly dead? "Science" told those people that someone was in fact dead without a doubt. They don't just stick you in the morgue on a whim.

But they were not dead. Either that or they came back to life somehow. How do we know I'm not gonna come back to life somehow? I don't want to wake up on a table in Harvard halfway through a vivisection with half my organs lying around me on the table. Actually I believe those cadavers have already had their blood replaced with embalming fluid...maybe... so if they had a chance to come back to life, it was "killed" already? Or do they get corpses in original condifion? Maybe the embalming fluid is just for open casket funerals... i think the organs are all removed and put into a bag full of embalming fluid and then the bag is placed into your stomach and chest cavity. Is that true? Is anyone here a mortician? Or an undertaker? Or whatever the he'll it's called? Medical Examiner?

a reply to: ProfessorChaos

Then donate your body to help others
See my sig for more.

originally posted by: g146541
My body can be used as well...

Fine...I'll let my body be used also.

Someone please make another weekend at Bernie's movie with me.