"Twisted Fate" [Feb.2014]

"TWISTED FATE"

Romeo is bleeding
Thou's heart has been broken
Of another man's love
Juliette has spoken

For this love story
Has another twist of fate
And in Romeo's fouled soul
Twas not a moment too late

As he offered Juliette
To put her hand in thine
Sharing a goblet of poison
Portraying it as wine

And as they lay together
Trying to endure the pain
Romeo told Juliette
True lover's they would remain

He would share her with no man
Of this he would make her a believer
Together they would end as lovers
Questioning whom was the deceiver

Twas it the unfaithful Juliette
For loving another man
Or tis it the jilted Romeo
For conceiving his deadly plan

Or could it have been us
And not Romeo or Juliette
For we wanted such a love
This world could never forget..

reply to post by HumAnnunaki


I like your style of writing. Very nice. I enjoys this one as well.
It was kinda heart breaking... But at the same time beautiful..
I enjoyed this
-nat

reply to post by natalia


Nat - your too kind!
I thank you once again
Would you care to contribute to my third installment of this 'tri-poetry' contest?
(we could write together or I could use your ideas..?)

This poem was taking a traditional story and updating it to
how in the new millenium our world reflects.
True it is dark - but in a way, a love story..a devious love triangle accustomed to
how our world can truly work.

Be well

reply to post by HumAnnunaki


I finally wrote a poem tonight for the contest.
Have you done your third entry yet? I feel I may only have one entry.. Maybe two

reply to post by natalia


No Nat, I haven't given thought yet to third entry..(other than one line)

Reading through the posted poems of other members, seems the obvious ideas
have already been submitted, and as a person whom prides himself in individualism -
I would like to write something not yet chosen (hard to do with only two topics given)

Have you thought of my offer to co-write something..we could do it for fun.
(even submit it as a non contest fun coloboration)

Happy to hear you are entering this contest as I believe you are modest to your talent

Thank you once again, can't wait to read your submission(s)

Be well

reply to post by HumAnnunaki


This was great! I quite like your use of rhyme and meter, it all felt very flowing when reading it, and using Shakespeare's classic star-crossed lovers as a framing device always make for good tragedy. I like what you're hinting at in the last stanza, perhaps asking a lost love if perhaps she and the author are to blame for killing the Shakespearean sweethearts. Bravo!