Following up on ( psychological question ) thread . ( HOARDING }

Hi all, Thought i at least owed all of you that took the time to post and share your knowledge and heartfelt concerns and in some cases personal experiences. And especially for the advice to me to not be discouraged if things didnt improve and my endeavors seemed useless. Well needless to say she started cleaning her garage to make room for the transfer from the house, She , I found out later had even took before pics apparently in hopes of after pics of the progress.

Needless to say .... She had close to a month to do this. Would not except help . She kept saying soon she would need help that she was still making room and seperating and getting yardsale things ready for me to pick up etc.. I went by to check in hopes of getting her to let me help time was dwindling. She gave me a small box of junk that prob wont sell. I also recieved i more box of garbage for yard sale. Unbelievable what she kept , so anyway she never finished . the house is worse than ever. we visit in the garage now cuz there is nowhere to sit anymore upstairs . And when i talked to her today is i think the reason im getting back to you all, She had a very good friend whom had lost a friend recently. He lives 6 or more hours away, But was coming close to where we live for funeral and had arranged to leave early to drive and meet up with her. She was to leave at about 7 am to get there in time.

Mind you they were meeting in a diner or somthing like this some halfway point in a little town. Well i called to see how things were going this was at about 1.00 pm . She was still home , her bathroom is small and the one place she can vacum, well i guess she lifted an edge of it and seen dirt so she apparently before she new it had pulled up the whole carpet to vacum under it . And ruined it . The Perfectionist side in her.. could not leave a speck of dirt , Now new carpet she will need, So her friend had been sitting waiting and worring for at least 5 hours. His sole purpose was to see her and to send some things with her to bring back to his family he drove over 2 hours. She had not even called him or answered the phone. Oh and i forgot about the picture frame she came across in the garage she started sanding 5 yrs ago, She sanded it for 9 hours its perfect.. She did this instead of cleaning and she doesnt even have pic to go in it, I asked her what she was gonna do with it she said hang it in her house some day ???? alrighty then... That was a priority ??? Geez there is so much more to tell you all but this is too long already. do more later all... I guess i just needed to get this out. I love her and feel so frustrated with her. I dont want to give up i guess. But maybe its futile. Thanks for listening

[edit on 4-2-2010 by femmefreud]

To me it sounds like a nervous tick.

She is like full of anxiety or something and does not know how to channel it correctly.

Rather than call her crazy or say she has mental problems, I think she just needs some counseling with a smart person.

Once she can get a grip on her underlying issues, she can then learn to focus them outwardly much more effectively.

And perhaps she will not rip that carpet up next time over a spec of dust??

Try to find her a good person to sit and talk to about this.

reply to post by muzzleflash


Thank you , I was just given a recommendation for help for her. Getting her to go is the thing . Maybe i should go myself and see what i learn ,i dont know,Maybe i should just go for me ??? Maybe i shouldnt do anything at all . Thanks again

I think there is a lot to learn about hoarders. I had no clue about this until I recently inherited a hoarder and the mess. OP, I sent you a u2u. Maybe we can chat sometime?

[edit on 4-2-2010 by virraszto]

reply to post by virraszto


Thanks V, I returned your U2U, let me know after reading the original thread ,which will tell u a little more. I would love to chat and hear what scenario u are dealing with.. Teri