Ixtab: The Mayan Suicide Goddess

Originally posted by mystiq
The real God/Creator isn't. Most religions mangle God a lot. Blood sacrifice is a demonic thing.

What is Blood? It is material like this wold is and will turn to dust like everything on this planet including your body. Why is sacrifice demonic? all that you are doing is returning to earth what belongs to earth.

Nothing on this planet belongs to us. The only thing that belongs to us is our soul. We are here just to experience life. The soul cannot experience life without being in a material body, that is, the soul need a material body to experience love, hate, fear, greed, compassion, cold, heat, touch, taste, etc etc etc. Suicide is just an experience for the soul like any other thing in life. There is nothing good or bad in life, everything is just dust.........

Dust in the wind, eh? That was a friend of mine's graduation song, sad.

Thank you for all of your responses, I have much to think about. On the way to work I was thinking about Melville's Bartleby, the Scrivener.

www2.bartleby.com...

Spoilers ahead.

Bartelby gets hired as a scrivener, and the narrator is intrigued by his refusals to do work. Bartelby's only response is "I'd prefer not to". Insubordination for certain, Bartelby eventualy gets sent to prison for non-compliance of the highest order. The narrator visits him in prison and learns that Bartleby dies from starvation because he'd "prefer not to" eat. Which leads the narrator to exclaim the best line to end any piece of short fiction "Ah, Bartleby! Ah, humanity!"

Bartelby committed suicide. The narrator blames humanity. Interesting how one could just "prefer not to" do anything. Suicide by loss of interest. How many people feel like this? I am not there yet, but I do feel that I may have outstayed my welcome here on earth (to answer your question, Kailassa).



[edit on 1-12-2008 by pluckynoonez]

I'm an atheist.

I don't believe in the christian god, i don't believe in demons or mayan goddesses or anything like that.... For me, it's all old fashioned, primitive thinking.

I have considered suicide often, but its not the fear of hell or the temptation of heaven that stops me or compels me, far from it....

It was the realisation that I would never see my best friends again, never see my young sister grow into womanhood or never see my brother change into the man he wants to be.

At the time, I was homeless, trying drugs, depressed, aimless, jobless, heart broken and betrayed.... I had NOBODY to talk to, my family didn't want to bare my problems..... my friends didn't seem to care.

I attempted to hang myself with an old shirt, but that failed (miserably in fact, i just started choking on my own saliva).... I sat late one night beside the railway track, ready to just.... step in front of the train, but my legs turned to lead and I couldn't do it. I didn't have enough money for an overdose.... Even in my most darkest moment, my fear of heights prevented me from jumping to my death.

I am effectively a failed suicide attempt.

Its the fact that, two years ago i was at the lowest of the low and now i've clawed my way back towards something representing a decent life (I now have two jobs and I'm studying for a degree) and i'm in a relationship with a beautiful woman, i have my own flat, my family now talk to me and I have grown up beyond my own despair.

Back then, if someone was to tell me that in two years time, i would have everything back together, i would have called them a filthy liar.

But it's true....

It wasn't God or anything like that which saved me.... It was my own cowardice and yet my own bravery to endure this struggle that is called life.

As for anyone who has lost a loved one through suicide... As an atheist, I would by lying if i told you they are in heaven, but I would also be lying if i told you they are in hell.

They are at COMPLETE PEACE with the universe, and don't let ANY pseudo-spiritual person tell you otherwise, but for the sake of everyone who loves you (whether you know this or not) reconsider your thoughts and realise that the world will be a lonelier place without you and there will always be someone who can help, whether you would like to think so or not...

We will all die one day, but remember if you ever feel that pain, that loneliness or that utter confusion and despair..... Send me a private message (at least then you can talk to someone who has been through the agony themself i.e me.)

Peace be with you all.

May your days shine bright and may you all be strong.

One Love

Mr - L