For Sale:

FOR SALE:
Non-existent WMDs found in Iraq. Hardly used. Looking for buyers specifically in Iran.

Unused conscience, available in pristine condition. The owners do not have any use for it.

Large amounts of faux, incriminating data, generic enough to be adaptable for use against any Middle Eastern country that possesses large of amounts of oil reserves or can accommodate multiple strategic military bases.

Large containers of mainstream media testicles collected over the course of the last 5 years.

Surplus amount of hypocrisy, available for anyone who might be interested.

A special deal on used 'HIGH' Threat Level Alerts available from Homeland Security Advisory Department. Procurement of a box of 10 'HIGH' Threat Levels qualifies you to receive a 'SEVERE' Threat level for free.

Hunting Rifles and cartridges available for sale, as 'undisclosed' owner has recently given up hunting birds.

Large areas of untouched national park reserves available for sale to highest bidder. Comes with pre-approved drilling rights.

Extensively large collection of factual, documented evidence regarding global warming. Never been used.

The constitution. Obsolete piece of historical document of little relevance. Any offer will be entertained.

Priceless collection of Iraqi national treasures (of historical value apparently but any offer will be accepted).

Contract for management and logistics of election rigging (in US and abroad). Always on the look out for best offer.

Last remaining pieces of Human Rights still left over from last year's sale. Already boxed up, shredded and ready to be used as refuse.

The War on Terror. Available for free for mass consumption. Comes with a variety phobias and fears for the general populace.

A lovely box set of the middle class and the poor. All proceeds to go to the foundation of the Repulsively Rich.

The Soul – (ALL SOLD OUT - SORRY!)

[sarcasm] Great thread! Really current events there! You should post more just like it! [/sarcasm]