Let's start a politician joke thread!

I'll kick off with this one:


A man and his wife were wondering what their son would be when he grew up, so the man comes up with an idea.

The man puts a ten-dollar bill, a bottle of whiskey, and a Bible on the coffee table. "If he picks up the money, he'll be a banker," the man tells his wife. "If he picks up the whiskey, he'll be a wino, and if he picks up the Bible, that means he'll be a preacher."

So the man and his wife hide and watch as their son walks in.

The young man picks up the ten-dollar bill, looks at it, then sets it down. Then he picks up the whiskey bottle, uncorks it, takes a sniff, then sets it back down. He then picks up the Bible, leafs through it, and puts it back down.

Then the young man takes the money and shoves it in his pocket, grabs the whiskey, and puts the Bible under his arm and walks out.

"Well how do you like that!" says the father. "He's going to be a politician!"

Very nice. I liked that one.

If Ted Kennedy goes golfing with O.J. Simpson, John Bobbit, and Heidi Fleiss who will win...


No one! O.J. keeps slicing, Bobbit doesn't have a putter, Fleiss keeps hooking it, and Kennedy can't drive over water.