Eyewitness News

It was a cold, brisk morning as I made my way down the street to Mom's Diner. I could see my breath exhaust increase in size as I labored through the remains of dirty sidewalk snow and iced over puddles. The tote bag I carried felt twice as heavy as it did ten minutes before. I was daydreaming about summer warmth when suddenly everything happened at once.
The scream. Alarms going off. Running . . .lots of running. A bus slamming into parked cars. More screaming. And swearing. Shots fired ? Sirens ?
Loss of consciousness.

I am asking for any eyewitness accounts of exactly what happened. And why, why am I . . . .so happy ?

Witness #1 - I saw it. I saw it all. Those damn robbers came outta the bank so fast and scared the living bejesus out of old lady McNiel, who began screaming her a$$ off. Some guy on the street got in the way and they just bowled him over. The bag he was carrying landed in the street and the bus that was going by swerved to miss it. Ran right into those cars. I think the guy was happy he was still alive.

Witness #2 - I saw this man walking pass the bank, carrying some kind of large bag. Just then people began running like hell and some old lady began screaming. People were running into each other and I thought I heard shots, but I can't be sure. Next thing I know the guy's down for the count. I think the bus driver must've freaked because he veered right into some parked cars. At that time I figured the police were on their way because I could hear sirens. I think the guy that went down was happy to hear the sirens too.

Witness #3 - Well, I was sitting at the counter at Mom's when I declare, the street turned into something from the Twilight Zone. Chaotic, that's what it was. I saw this man on the ground wrestling with some guy who was trying to steal his tote bag. The guy eventually just ran off. Then this local bus just ran right into those parked cars over there. That's when I spilled my coffee. Spilled it right down the front of this old gentleman and let me tell you I've never seen someone that old move so fast. But the swearing, oh my, it made my ears burn. Someone in the diner called the police thank goodness. Last thing I remember was looking at that guy on the sidewalk . . .and wondering why he was laughing.

Anymore eyewitnesses ? What did you see ? And why am I laughing ?

a reply to: SIEGE

Eyewitnesses #4

I saw some masked guys run out of the bank.

They knocked over a dude carrying a big tote bag that rolled into the street. They knocked him out! They kept on running. I heard sirens so I thought the bank teller tripped the silent alarm.

The tote bag was in the middle of the street. The bus swerved to miss it and plowed into some parked cars which set off the alarms.

I went to the guy and thought he was having convolutions because he hit his head on the sidewalk.

But he was laughing!!