"They"

It had been a rough day and a rougher night. Joshua was in juvenile detention.

Joshua had been blessed with an amazing perception and wisdom beyond his years. Unfortunately, he had not been blessed with the ability to react to it with controlled maturity. In fact, it was the exact opposite, uncontrolled immaturity. He hung his head in his hands and thought about the numerous times in his life he had suffered what 'they' referred to as a melt down. It was a sadly disproportionate number compared to his age.

There was that time when he was six years old. They thought he might find a movie entertaining. He was dragged out of a theater not even half way through the movie yelling, “Its monkeys on horses! How do they expect me to believe monkeys on horses?” He had a point, after all.

Then there was the scene with his first girlfriend, Jennifer. The two formed a quick bond and were always at each others side. She didn't show up one day and Joshua was troubled by her absence. She was his rudder in open seas. She kept him on an even keel. She failed to appear the second day and Joshua was concerned, not just for her but himself as well. Days followed days and still no word from Jennifer. Joshua inquired as to her whereabouts. “Attic monsters,” they told him. His mind reeled at the thought of it. But he could not deny, she was apparently gone.

Two weeks later Jennifer reappeared, bronzed from the sun, and laden with tales of sickeningly sweet fresh picked pineapple. “Attic monster fruit – very common,” they said.

Joshua thought about all the things 'they' had said over the years.

“Don't run with scissors!” Why did scissors have to travel slowly? That made no sense.

“Stay away from the lion cage!” Why? The lion looked perfectly fine in there.

“Don't plug in the hair dryer if you are sopping wet!” When else would I want to? He wondered.

Joshua realized his entire life had been one long caution shouted at him. It was the only interaction they had with him. It was the only time they paid him any attention. And it had taken it's toll. It was too much for his young fragile mind to take.

Joshua heard them talking outside his room.

“That's why they found Joshua parading back and forth in front of the lion's cage at the zoo, sopping wet, his shoe laces untied, with a blow drier in one hand, a pair of scissors in the other, a plastic bag over his head, covered in meat tenderizer, with sliced pineapple draped around his neck looking like a terribly upset garnish on his way to a hair stylist's convention.”

Joshua, sitting serenely on the floor looking amusingly bohemian and meditating, chuckled to himself when he heard the description of his condition. They were in for a treat this time. He hoped they would be satisfied with his latest efforts at fulfilling their wishes. For a moment he wondered if he had misinterpreted the meaning of all the cautions they had shouted at him. No, he had it right. It had to be what they wanted him to do. After all, they always shouted at him for the things he hadn't done, not the things he had. He hoped his latest display would make them happy. Joshua was funny that way.