Panties Panties Panties

Okay so here's the deal.
the other day I remember my wife saying she needed new undies, while she was digging through her dresser.

at the time I didn't think much about it...

then yesterday I was Wal-Mart picking up some grocery's and when I passed the lades section, I remember 'Hey my wife needs new panties' I can do that for her!

well it sounded like a plan at the time...

Look I'm not a total igg when it comes to shopping for girl clothes, my wife and I have been together for eleven years, we each know each other's sizes. on top of that we have two lovely daughters. Soooo I should have no problem buying a package of Hanes her way, right? Wrong!!!

Problem one... women's clothes is sized differently than men's clothes
problem two... regardless of size all those little plastic packages of panties are identical!
Problem three... like most men shopping for women's underwear I want to grab and go, get the hell out of there before anyone I know sees me...
problem four... when they say small medium and large do they mean like men sizes small medium and large or more of that nebulous I don't understand woman size small medium and large?

Remember now the clocks ticking, grab and go, make a best guess, I got a one in three shot of getting it right so this should be easy... I can do this...



Needless to say my wife has made it quite clear, she would prefer if I refrain from buying her any kind of undergarments for the foreseeable future...

reply to post by HardCorps


LOL Nice attempt

Perfect example of "it's the thought that counts". Good try though, buddy. You made an effort whereas a lot of guys wouldn't.

reply to post by HardCorps


Well apparently you got the Granny Panty selection down pat.

Personally i would have gone with something a bit smaller and shearer.

You get a A+ for the attempt though. Sticking my hand in a purse is another thing I've learned to avoid.

reply to post by Pistoche


What was really funny...
both our daughters one 9 the other 6 could each stand in a single leg hole...

SLAYER69
reply to post by HardCorps

 

Well apparently you got the Granny Panty selection down pat.

Personally i would have gone with something a bit smaller and shearer.

You get a A+ for the attempt though. Sticking my hand in a purse is another thing I've learned to avoid.

i did the hand in the purse thing yesterday looking for keys.....never again

reply to post by HardCorps


If that is your wifey in picture I am pretty sure of the three choices L,M,S you knew dern good n well L was wrong....

Char-Lee
reply to post by HardCorps

 

If that is your wifey in picture I am pretty sure of the three choices L,M,S you knew dern good n well L was wrong....

In all fairness to a man L would have been appropriate...
I blame package mislabeling... it should been sized as "OH MY GOD!"

Buy her boxer shorts, unisex ones you cant go wrong. Well I think?

Hilarious!! You are a sweetheart of a husband for trying to get your wife panties when you knew she needed new ones. I don't think my husband would ever brave that. Love the picture!

If you know your wife's pant size, and bought panties in that same size, that would be the problem. Is that what happened?

Pants size does NOT translate to panties size. I'm a size 8 (sometimes 10) in pants and I usually wear a size 6 in panties. There is no reason you, or any other husband, would know this. It's completely illogical. It's stupid.

Rough equivalents in packaged store-bought panty sizes... totally just making this up, but they should be roughly close... (these are American sizes, too... which don't translate to other countries... of course.)

Size 5 is Small - Size 4 or 6 in jeans
Size 6 is Medium - Size 8 or 10 in jeans
Size 7 is Large - Size 12 or 14 in jeans
Size 8 is XL - Size 16 or 18 in jeans
Size 9 is XXL - Size 20 in jeans
Size 10 is XXXL - Size 22 in jeans


Don't even get me started on bras and cup sizes. Arg! Whhhhhy?


Oh, and then there is the confusing business of when you cross a certain size threshold you go into "plus size" territory, which can have it's own sizing. 1X, which you might think is equal to XL, is really much much larger than that for instance. And then the vanity-type sizes, I guess you would call it, where something is plus size but they still say S, M, L.... but really, the small is equal to an XXL.

This is the kind of information that should be included in a pamphlet given to all young women when they reach puberty. We need some sort of central source for this stupid stuff that is not at all intuitive.

Basically, the only way you could have been prepared for the insane task, other than knowing her panty size, is to know her hips measurement. Most packages will have the hips measurements on the back to help you buy the right size.

Thanks so much for sharing... I needed the laugh! And, apparently, I needed to join in the rant!

So, have you come up with some creative ways to use those monstrosities?

A. Pup tent

B. Car Shammy

D. Panty hat

reply to post by HardCorps


OP, I gotta meet your wife. She is the most kind, understanding and warm hearted woman I've heard of in a long long time!

My wife would have seen me in a low rent motel for at least a week after something like that. Oh, no couch for that level of offense. Nope... I'd have been off to the no-tell motel and trying to study between bed frames slapping the adjoining walls all night.

That was a close one tho, I'm sure! Whew!

* They should have a clerk at the womans underthings section to deter well meaning men right at the edge of the tile, so we don't even walk into such a minefield of domestic unrest.

reply to post by SLAYER69


A battle flag

A kite

A handkerchief

A disguise

reply to post by HardCorps


Thanks for the laugh. I feel bad for both you and her. I'm with Slayer. Slinky and shear is the way to go.

I'm not sure I would have ever picked up underwear for a woman at Walmart however, unless it was an emergency.

A+ for the effort and thoughtfulness. Good guy!

reply to post by SLAYER69


I can't stop laughing!!!

HC, you learned the Secret all men must keep from the fairer sex...if you never want to do something again, do it as wrong as possible.
She will never ask again.
Good for you for being a gentleman and trying to do a good deed. Karma will come your way.

reply to post by SLAYER69


They came three in a package so I think I might have enough there
to tarp my old willies jeep???

Aww, you're a sweetheart OP!! (lol)
I seriously believe most guys would have gone straight to the leopard-print thong, edged with feathery boa...or glitter!
You definitely should get brownie points for picking Hanes from WalMart! Good intentions indeed!

Still laughing at the 'granny panty' pic...."Erm...do these make my butt look big?"

jacygirl

jacygirl
Aww, you're a sweetheart OP!! (lol)
I seriously believe most guys would have gone straight to the leopard-print thong, edged with feathery boa...or glitter!
You definitely should get brownie points for picking Hanes from WalMart! Good intentions indeed!

Still laughing at the 'granny panty' pic...."Erm...do these make my butt look big?"

jacygirl

I would have been better off buying her a pair of naughty undies...
those they leave out on full display so I can make a good guess as to size...

but normal everyday wear stuff....

I'm telling you, we guys need visual cues, we need samples!!!

and we need a look out to warn us if anyone is coming down the aisle...

jacygirl
I seriously believe most guys would have gone straight to the leopard-print thong, edged with feathery boa...or glitter!

He wasn't shopping for himself

reply to post by SLAYER69


Naw I'm more your eatable undies kind of guy.

That way I can scratch my itch and have a snack at the same time...

who says we men can't multi task?