I've been a mobile phone lurker on this forum for a short while, but your post prompted me to join this forum and make my first post, so you must
have a knack at it!
Thank you so much for sharing your story in such an honest way, I found it fascinating and quite moving too - hence me taking the time to join and
The internet's a funny place, with lots of BS and exaggerations etc, so not sure how this comes across from a "newbie" - but since a very young
child I've been obssessed with all things OBE, astral projection, lucid dreams, NDEs, meditation, "kundalini", entheogens etc etc - and there's no
need to be "unsettled" by your experience, you're not going mad, haha
These kind of experiences do happen, multiple identies/perspectives held in conscious awareness simultaneously, bilocation, some sort of time
travel/teleportation etc (don't get me wrong, I am not saying, or even denying, these are literally "real" experiences - whatever "real" may be -
but that you can have the experiential appearance of these phenomenea, though interpretation of what these experiences are or mean is up for grabs.
(that's a rabbit hole too deep and dark to go down here
I have had similar experiences myself - and some related, but entirely undescribable experiences involving multiple "identities" all inter-related
and "held" within a singular consciouss awareness - mind boggling and blowing really (I believe there is a strong possibility, based on a lifetime -
I'm 36 - of study and experience, that we may possibly be beings outside of time and space, with multiple inter-related aspects of our being being
played out across multiple "realities" - but enough random speculations from a random poster on the internet!!
What I thought, perhaps, you may find very interesting and helpful to you, is a book called "The Daemon - a Guide to your Extraordinary Inner Self"
by a guy called Anthony Peake:
Now whilst I don't fully agree with (or even generally to be honest) with many of Anthony's conclusions (especially regarding his
interpretation/charictarisation of NDEs, and how we live the same life over & over again), I nonetheless find some of his work very interesting and
fascinating - and this book is absolutely fantastic! I'm not just randomly suggesting this book, but feel you may, possibly, get a lot out of it in
specific relation to your experience - it may genuinely help or soothe you in some way, and help give you an alternate insight into your experience -
and maybe why you should appreciate it as it sounds like it was something you may have needed at that point of your life, in context of your
relationship with your son.
Anyways, thanks for sharing - it's gems like your post why I trawl through forums like these